I’ve completed 60 days today of no masturbation to pornography, I still edge to my imagination of my girlfriend in the mornings everyday but I don’t cum, I masturbate with my girlfriend sometimes, and I’ve come across pornographic images (not videos) like 2 or 3 times by accident and not with the intention of indulging in porn. Have I completed 60 days or is it a facade? My goal was to cut out masturbation to porn and to stop watching pornography
It's a Grey area because I did the same. I personally don't think it's a facade because you still get to clear your brain fog and you've kept your addiction under control. Which is a hell of lot better than nothing. However if you are really committed to rebooting, you probably should eliminate all forms of edging. Just my opinion.
So to improve more on the next 60 days I would tell you to stop masturbation and stop edging. Continue to completely refrain from porn. I would say that your 60 days wasn't as pure as it should be. I'm not criticizing. I've been there many times. Let the penis rest. The penis is a muscle and it needs its recovery period. Only enjoy a nice time with your girlfriend. What I mean by that don't fantasize sexual things about her. To your mind that's a trigger for porn. Good luck on your streak. Your streak wasn't too bad so far but there's always room for improvement. My mouth is the closest to my own ear so I'm addressing myself as well.
I appreciate your opinions I guess for my next 60 days I’m going to cut out edging by myself, I do enjoy it when my girlfriend asks me to masturbate to her though so I won’t cut that out. Starting from tomorrow though no more edging at home. wish you guys all the best!
Sad to say, you have relapsed every morning for 60 days. Edging is much worse than masturbating until you cum. See: What if I masturbate (edge) or watch porn without orgasm? (yourbrainonporn.com)
I agree yes that edging is the worst ever. That is why in the past streaks of mine if I get so far to the point that I actually started to M ans I feel that the urge to O is near, then I rather just cum and get over with it because I basically already lost the moment I started to M. So may I then ask, is non ejaculatory sex just as harmful as the effect of edging?
It depends on what your problems are and reasons for recovery: 1. If you've developed hand-grip expectation/satisfaction (with M or edging - same thing here) to the failure of regular sex, you've just increased your erectile dysfunction all the more. 2. If you are dependent on dopamine hits to the brain (like any drug high), then you have intensely fueled the addiction more so than with edging than regular M - you've elevated your addiction to new heights. 3. Your controlled and sensationalized images of your gf (P substitute) in fantasy may not play out the same as in real life. Hence, you've only pornographized your gf as an object, and have failed in recovery here, but not accessing regular P is a good achievement here, at least. Sad to say, the 60 days may be largely meaningless (no streak at all) as you've indulged full blown in addiction many times along the way. Unless, of course, this is what you're going for and the bondage that you want over your life.
I agree with you in the sense that I get that high from edging, but I do disagree with you on the “pornographied gf” idea.. I think it’s only natural to fantasize, and I believe that if you can fantasize something about someone REAL not a porn actress then your expectations can be met. My issue was the hand/grip and the constant want for someone new or something new. My next goal is to cut out edging though I do believe it’s counterproductive
Its still 60 days of (mostly) no porn so thats a start. Don't discredit your progress. If your goal truly was to just cut out porn and masturbation to porn, that sounds like what you've done for the past two months. I'm not sure if its been proven that fantasies or images in the mind register the same as if you actually saw those images in real life, I've heard of that before but never actually saw any study showing it so maybe someone can link me something. I think generally fantasy can be normal and healthy for those not addicted or affected by it(so not most of us on this site haha), but it becomes a problem when you're fantasizing so much you're edging to it and therefore holding back your recovery which is what it sounds like here. So it sounds like for you at your stage of recovery fantasy is dangerous and at the end of the day, you're still masturbating to images, they're just mental images. You cut out porn for 2 months almost perfectly, the next step if you wish to do so is cut out those fantasies and the edging.