ONE DAY AT A TIME

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by muntasira, Dec 29, 2015.

  1. muntasira

    muntasira Fapstronaut

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    I want to talk again about a concept which I posted earlier in a different thread, because I feel it is a powerful concept that is essential in recovering and it is the concept of "ONE DAY AT A TIME". We've all been in this situation where we set long desired goals for abstinence i.e I wan't to quit for the next 1 month, or 3 months or 6 months etc. Though it's not bad to set such goals the problem is you keep thinking too much into the future instead of focusing all your efforts and energy in the present. Instead we can all try this different strategy where we wake up everyday in the morning with positive energy and promise ourselves and to God that we will not let our guard down for the day. That's right it seems a lot easier when you say everyday when you wake up, "Today I will stay strong" rather than to say for the next 3 months or so "I will stay strong". Otherwise think of the journey of healing and recovery as small steps that add up to deliver you to freedom. I hope we all gain the strength to overcome our weakness.
     
  2. Rav70

    Rav70 Fapstronaut

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    From what I've read if you can say porn is no longer an option and stick with it that's your best bet. Everyone is different though. Good luck.
     
  3. muntasira

    muntasira Fapstronaut

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    That's right, I read that before somewhere but couldn't figure out how to put it into real practice. I think it means creating an environment that makes relapse difficult and abstinence easier. Like having someone close monitor browsing history etc.
     
  4. DRD

    DRD Fapstronaut

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    My approach is to set smaller goals like first let it be 30 days without PMO, then 90, then 180, you get the idea. I suppose it worked for me much better than if I would have set the goal to 180 days from the very beginning. Though it depends on your willpower, if someone is seriously addicted then setting a goal like next 24 hours may be the only thing that works for them.

    This works but only to limited extent. At the end of the day, it all depends on your willpower because there is nothing that can't be bypassed.
     
  5. Olaz

    Olaz Guest

    Your "today" approach seems great to me. I'm still struggling with non-stop relapse. A yo-yo life of porn use and hating myself the rest of the time.

    I'm using your approach tomorrow.
     
  6. Jack Writer

    Jack Writer Fapstronaut

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    I also follow the one day at a time mentality, sometimes it's one minute or one second at a time. I also have set long term goals, but sometimes the urges are so great, it it a struggle to make it past the next minute.
     
  7. Saturdaze

    Saturdaze Fapstronaut

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    I am with you Jack Writer. When I first started this journey I was happy to get one day at a time. Some days it was one minute at a time as the urges were really strong. I think One Day at a Time is a great goal. Even at day 79 I still have those days when it is "Just get through this day". Hopefully it gets easier but I definately am a believer in not setting too high of goals as they seem impossible to reach and many give up because the goals are so far reaching.
     
  8. muntasira

    muntasira Fapstronaut

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    I totally agree with you, everyone is different in their ability to cope with this load placed on our shoulders, there can be different ways to look at it. But even as we set long term goals we should put all of our effort and energy for today. That small steps combined will get us eventually past 6 months, 1 year or even long term sobriety.
     
    DRD likes this.
  9. muntasira

    muntasira Fapstronaut

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    Never give up hope, we will get there sooner or later God willing. I will give you an excerpt of a scientist who invented the light bulb we use today, though it might seem offtopic a bit the concept is very much related, "Thomas Edison famously designed more than 1,000 light bulbs before finding one that worked. As he was doing so, the public and scientific community regarded his oddity of an experiment as a grand failure. In fact, upon his successful invention of the light bulb, a reporter asked him, “How did it feel to fail 1,000 times?”
    I didn’t fail 1,000 times,” Edison answered. “The light bulb was an invention with 1,000 steps.”

    That is the right attitude. Each ostensible ‘failure’ is a learning experience, the people who have gotten rid of any type of serious addiction not just porn addiction also relapsed many times until they probably lost count, so we are on a journey of recovery and healing which has ups and downs, always be positive and try your best.
     
  10. muntasira

    muntasira Fapstronaut

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    That's right this is a journey of ups and downs, it's like a rollercoaster ride, there is always hope, porn addiction is probably in the same category as alcohol, cocaine, and other drugs since it is a difficult addiction to deal with. Also I researched online and found this Herbal drug/medicine called "Ibogaine" this ibogaine drug is allegedly used to treat most kinds of addcition from methadone, heroine, hard drugs, alcohol, allegedly it resets the brain chemistry and helps it break free from addiction by eliminating cravings. who knows maybe even porn/sex addiction. The reason I bring this up is because all addictions work the same way in the brain, so porn/alcohol/drugs etc all work by creating chemical dependency in the brain. I wanted to share this information out please check out ibogaine guys and give your opinions.
     
    Last edited: Dec 30, 2015
  11. Saturdaze

    Saturdaze Fapstronaut

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    A friend of mine who was addicted to cocaine and meth and porn told me that kicking his porn addiciton was harder for him than either cocaine or meth. Wow - that puts things into perspective.
     
  12. muntasira

    muntasira Fapstronaut

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    yes porn addiction is a serious challenge and I can only imagine how difficult it is to deal with 3 different types of addiction at once. Can you check into this herb/drug called "Ibogaine" it is allegedly used to treat many types of serious addictions ranging from hardcore drugs,gambling, alcohol and I'm thinking to myself probably why not even porn/sex addiction, since all addictions scientifically work the same way in changing the brain chemistry. Every problem has a solution(This could be the natural herb in nature) if things get to worst which I hope not I will be looking into this as the final solution.
     

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