Not sure if GF is helping or not

So, this is gonna be kind of long.
I have been in a relationship with a girl now for 4 months, my longest ever. We met this summer and instantly started spending almost all our time together. I had been very lonely and loved her company and interest in me (I am smart but not the best socially). She told me she loved me very quickly, less than a month and we had talks about the future and houses, kids etc. Maybe a little over a month later I was not feeling the same about the relationship and went to break up. It was painful for both of us, and after several days we were talking again and decided to follow through on previous plans to take a vacation in Jamaica. The trip was great, and it seems that whenever I'm 'on an adventure' with her we both have lots of fun and get along well.

We're back in the city now working jobs and the relationship isnt the same. Now I am getting the same feeling I had when I first broke up with her, I feel like she is trying to subtley manipulate me, she says she cares but can never listen more than a few sentences. She loves to talk which is great in a lot of situations (she's great at the social game) but can't seem to listen when I need her to. I've told her about NoFap and explained how serious it was, but she doesn't understand and always wants to have sex, which is good but then I orgasm when I dont want to. And a really hard thing is I am not physically attracted to her. I am totally turned off physically during sex and only do it to please her. She wants to please me a lot (too often) as well, but I just don't want it. I just like her company. So we've had sex maybe 2 or 3 times in last month. Also, she set up her messaging service on my phone and a chat popped up. When I looked there was a message from my gf to one of her friends about me saying "Im making the time he spends with me so intoxicating that he thinks im the way to life". That seems really manipulative to me. She does take me out a lot and spend money I know she doesn't have. Another thing is she is 35 and I am 23. I just don't know what to make of the situation and could use some outside opinions.