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Nofap makes my love life harder

Discussion in 'Rebooting in a Relationship' started by Lastone, Jun 9, 2018.

  1. Jun 9, 2018 #1
    Lastone

    Lastone New Fapstronaut

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    hello guys!

    We have been together with my gf for one and a half year now and in the beginning of the realitionship i found out i have/had PIED(by the way she is my first who i truly love and i had my first sex with her). So i started nofap but i always relapsed after a few weeks this went on, my longest strike is 32 days. Before her i had a crush on a girl from school but you know i neved tought i had a chance at her. Half year ago i was in a middle of a no PMO session and idk why i started to chat with her and found out she likes me very much. My gf found out that we spoke and you would think that is was over there but unfortunately not. We started to chat again a few months later and my gf found out again. I know it was a digusting thing to do and i feel shame and hate my self about it. My gf and me spoke about it and went on( i feel very lucky to have her, she made my life special). I was thinking about why i did this and found out that maybe my fantasy or brain tricked me into the cheting. That time when i spoke with this girl i was fapping like non-stop but after a week or two i always felt like i don’t want to chat with her anymore. She never really made me laugh or anything as my gf do and i never liked the way she sees things, i was only in to her looking and sexyness but couldn’t imagine myself to be with her only sex. Now the situation my gf and me haven’t had sex for 3-4 weeks we both busy but i am afraid it is because of this girl. I don’t love her or anything maybe i like her. But anytime i fantasy about her my little guy gets hard but when i do this with my gf it doesn’t move. Maybe i am attracted to this girl? Is it possible that my brain tricks me? I want to be with my gf and have sex only with her but i just can’t stop thinking about that other girl altough i know that i don’t want to with her. I just wanna make sex with my girlfriend and forget all about my mistakes... i don’t know if you understand what am i saying. Maybe i just wanted to write down these things but please help me. I feel like sh!t and want to forget this girl and have sey with my gf.

    If you ever were in my shoes please tell me something
     
    Lastone, Jun 9, 2018
    Lastone, Jun 9, 2018
    #1
  2. Jun 9, 2018 #2
    Julius93

    Julius93 Fapstronaut

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    I haven't been in your shoes, but some of my friends were. You are in a bad situation. You have to fix this before it gets out of hand. I don't know the exact nature of the conversations you have with that other girl, but I can make a judgement based on the consequences:

    You could have invested this time and effort in your relationship instead. You have been caught twice. Your gf may have said that she has forgiven you, but girls (generally speaking) don’t get easily over these kind of things. It can be quite hurtful for your girlfriend to know that you have started to replace her more and more by somebody else:

    You have already broke some rules and your behaviour has already done some damage. You have to make the right choice right now. It’s quite clear actually. You have to stop that type of contact you have with that other girl. Maybe you should stop contacting her at all. I personally think that’s the right thing to do. Each time you feel the desire to reach out to her, reach out to your girlfriend instead. She deserves your attention more.
     
    Julius93, Jun 9, 2018
    Julius93, Jun 9, 2018
    #2

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