hi people, I´m new here and today is barely my 3rd day I decided to quit porn of my life. I had some troubles with my relationships and I figured out that was cause of porn, It was like 12 years watching porn, now I´m 27 years old and single. taking this decision was not easy but I think it worths the effort, the time and everything. my last girlfriend talk me about this site and today I decided to take a look for some advices, only three days and sometimes I found myself trying to access to my my old folder, wich one I just deleted yesterday. now I see people here that had reached months and months, and it looks so far away for me. any advice? what should I do when a "urge" comes? how can I keep myself calm? any advice is well received, thanks for them and reading this post of a newbie.. It´s a very long way to me now..
Hey Mario, Really happy you are here now! Congratulations on your third day being clean. PMO (looking at pornography and masturbating until you have an orgasm--ejaculate) makes us slaves to our urges, makes us feel dirty and guilty, destroys our self-respect and self-confidence, weakens our relationships with others, especially women, and just generally exhausts us. So why do it? Good question! Maybe it's because we have not given ourselves the motivation to quit for good. I am convinced that every guy can stop using porn and masturbating and edging whenever he decides to, then does something about it. Nobody is too weak to stop and nobody is so trapped in it that he can't get out anytime. When you get urges, you can tell yourself that even after a 12 year habit, you can say NO right here and right now. When you get urges, you can tell yourself the truth--your body and your mind do NOT need to have an orgasm. When you get urges to watch porn or to masturbate, be sure to have some other things that you can substitute immediately. When I get the urges, I turn on my music, or I think about my next time to exercise and what I will do, or I remember something I memorized, like a poem, or, the best, I start to talk to God as a best friend and Father. It is late now, so I have to go to bed. I can tell you some of the other things that help me stay clean and pure if you want. For now, I am glad you are on NoFap, and I know you can succeed if you want it and work every day for it. Peace, brother.
Welcome, I will start by saying when you say it seems like months are far away from now just take it one day at a time. No journey is anything more then a long time taking a bunch of steps. Don't let it overwhelm you my friend. As for when the urges come slow down and think about the reasons to stay strong. Don't be overly harsh on a relapse just learn from them and reevaluate you plans for freedom and fi ne tune them to be better and pay very close attention to your triggers they will be your enemy at first and your greatest ally later on for once you know them you will notice them and be able to brace your self and over come your urges. Good luck to you my friend and may you find peace and freedom in your journey.
Good, Mario. Keep your guitar near you -- it can be a very useful substitute when you are having temptations. Do you exercise (workout)? It is very good for both the body and the spirit. Lift weights, go running, do calisthenics, anything to make you sweat a lot. Take cold showers. Don't keep any computer or smartphone in your bedroom or bathroom. Go to bed only when you can go to sleep quickly. If you see a pretty girl or woman, do not look again to fantasize about her. Is today your 4th day without PMO? That means you are farther along than you were yesterday. Can you set a goal for one week (only 3 more days) and when you achieve that, go for one more week....! Paz, Mario, y rogamos.
thanks for your words and time, trust me that any advice now and in the future is really apreciated.. and yes, every long journey begins with a few steps.. god bless friend..
Not all advise is created equal though nay Sayers will give advise to steer you back in the wrong direction. But you are not alone and those like us that support you will try and help you with the burden so you are not alone in this fight.
