My journey with loneliness and its relationship to my PMO problem

This post will double as a search for support and a confession of how I feel most of the time, which I think might help my road to recovery. I hope you'll forgive that it's a bit of a stream of conscious.
I think that a mixture of loneliness regret about my lifestyle is probably the biggest cause of my abuse of PMO. When I was a teenager I never really had any friends. I had a friendship group but was never close to any of them. When I went to university I would only go to my lectures and seminars and then go home without talking to anyone. I'm currently twenty-three and I've never had a serious relationship or had a sexual encounter of any kind. When I started my Master's degree I realised that was no longer enough for me so I started to try and get out there and meet new people and maybe find myself a girlfriend. I realised during this process that I'd missed out on so much in my youth and I think that's increased my sexual frustration. I often resent other, young, couples and I can't stand to hear colleagues talk about their youthful "exploits." Even though I have a great group of friends this year, that I've never had before, I lack that companionship that I want from a relationship. Sometimes I feel so lonely I could cry, like no one really knows me.
I ended up dating a girl during my master's year but she treated me terribly with behaviour bordering on "gas lighting" in day-to-day interactions and when it came to sex it was always "next time, next time" which, as you can imagine, was somewhat frustrating to a young virgin. That experience only heightened my frustration which has led to more and more masturbation. Earlier this year I had what I thought was the best relationship I'd ever been in but it later emerged that it wasn't a relationship at all and she'd been leading me on the whole time. I don't even know why.
Every time I try and get close to a girl they abruptly cut off contact with me, "ghost" me I guess you call it. Each time it gets more and more distressing to the point where I can't imagine myself being in a normal relationship. It's so alien to me and my lack of experience of relationships makes it hard for me to construct one. I always think about times when I've come so close and failed, I imagine alternate scenarios, I masturbate. At this stage, having the sexual encounter has become the most important thing to me and I fear that that is what is poisoning all my relationships. My hope is that if I can get my sexual urges under control and then I can build a meaningful relationship and end this chronic loneliness.
Has anyone else ever felt like this? The isolation, the regret, the mythologising of the sexual act to the point where you can't even look at a woman without thinking of her sexually? How did anyone deal with it? Will I ever be able to get over it, or will it always be there in the back of my mind?