It's now 12 am and I have begun day 1 of no porn. I feel like I've watched porn too much, and I'm not the Human being I'm gonna be. I suffer from depression; sometimes severe, and I'm gonna make myself better. I also have social anxiety which I feel is holding me back too much. I've looked up the effects people have had once they quit watching porn, and it made me really wanna try it. The main and pretty much sole reason I'm doing this is help me get a girlfriend. I'm very very lonely and I need a lover. Everytime I'm done jerking it to porn I just feel empty inside because although it felt really good and pleasurable, the real thing I need is the intimacy of a real girl. I figured my energy was going towards the wrong thing, I figure why not give this a shot and see how much it helps me with finding a lover. Anyway, morning time is when I'm ridiculously horny and that's usually when I always masturbate and watch porn. Instead I'm gonna try using each morning as a time for meditation, I'm one who believes and practices astral travel, so I think it'll be a good thing to replace porn with that. When I was in elementary school I was such an outgoing and crazy kid, even the girls loved me. But now here I am, 20 years old and I have no friends aside from friends online I talk to. I'm gonna go back to my outgoing and free self. Tired of being anxious everywhere I go and not talking to girls I'm interested in. My mind feels toxic.
hey there, I haven't been on Nofap that long but I share your sentiments. today is my 20th day of nofap. I want to let you know that you have found the right place. This is where people like us come to try to make life better. PMO addiction is real and it has destroyed many people but the fact that you are here is a great sign that you want to change. PMO however pleasurable is always going to be temporary. In the long run, it takes us further and further away from what we ultimately want and that is true intimacy with human beings. Rather than being a quick fix, it is in fact not a fix at all. In fact it is a deterrent. it deters us from real joy and happiness. It keeps us in a cycle of emptiness and relapse. I am practicing meditation these days and it helps me a lot. One of the best advice I have received is that we do not defeat porn addiction with a void but with better plans and better goals. I keep a daily timetable with all the things that I need to accomplish each day and I try to keep create a new way of life for myself where there is no time nor energy for porn. Think about all the other possibilities that can enrich our lives apart from porn. Exercise, going out, new hobbies, gaining knowledge about different subjects, meeting new people. Anyway, we are all in this together and we are willing to help in whatever ways we can. keep going and take it one day at a time. Small changes each day and before you know it you will be so much better than before.
Welcome! I'm glad you're here. Getting away from PMO won't solve every problem, but I believe it makes facing other problems a lot easier; because the enslavement to PMO can be so dispiriting. We're all here to help each other. Let me know what I can do to help.
