My Full Story (and I have a few problems that I can't solve, please help)/All-in-one Thread

Hi everyone, I'm a male and I am currently about 15 years old and a half. Oh, and you can call me anything similar to "Anonymous_User18312" based on your own preference. I hope you can tolerate any grammar mistakes or poor English here (just in case). Oh, and this post is extremely long. If needed, you can ask me to try to split it into a few threads or try to shorten it for me if possible.

So, let me tell my story first. It all started when I was attracted by a tall man who came to install Internet connection for my house the first time, when I was 7 years old that time. I was amazed by his height. That was the beginning of my sexual life. (Yes, you didn't read it wrong, I'm a male and attracted by this men) Surprising, isn't it? I am never attracted/interested to any women/girl/female and I never masturbated on any women/female before. Whenever I look at women/pictures of them, my penis would shrink. After that, I had naughty thoughts such as "wow, that man is so tall", then I started to fantasize about my own body and wanted to be tall like him too. Then I jumped at school during recess time to try to achieve that goal. I seem to have naturally have the knowledge of masturbating then later and later I discovered the act of it. So, one day, after kept thinking of such dirty thoughts, my hand held my penis and keep moving it up and down and at the end felt some pleasure. It felt like so fun/nice, so I continued doing this act of masturbating (just like everyone else). This is the story of the beginning of my masturbation life.

Let me try to be simple here on what's come next: over the time, I have been masturbating to stuff like: "my own body parts after I look at my own body and learnt about it", "my face with clear skin that time", "my legs with nice skin and I'm proud of its current height", "my arms", basically my own body (male body). Later, as time passes, I seem to be attracted to see any boy/men, especially those as the same race as me, and have dirty thoughts on their body parts. The naughty thoughts would usually be "wow, their skin is so clear/nice, no scars, their teachers/parents didn't slap/beat/pinch them", etc. I would masturbate on these. These few years, the dirty thoughts would be "about my own body not getting beaten, slapped,pinched by parents/classmates/teachers/etc., lack of scars as seen on my visible body parts like arms, palm", "my face is never slapped", etc..

One thing weird is, why my brain seems to be not interested/attracted by any people of the opposite gender(woman) but it's instead attracted to/masturbate on stuff like that (everything that I mentioned/described in the paragraph(s) above)? May I know whether it's normal or not? I get horny and get sexual/naughty/dirty thoughts only related to men/or my own body. I suspect I am maybe gay (or probably even born like that). Do you think the description as stated is considered as gay? If yes, can it be cured? Is it a psychological problem? If so, will I ever be able to get a girlfriend, marry and have children in the future when I'm an adult? This is just the first problem/question but actually there's one real main problem that I'm quite frustrated about. Keep continue reading to find out.

Secondly, another question, does masturbation before puberty leave any negative side effects like masturbation during/after puberty do? Seems like masturbation didn't really affect me when I did it when I was still small (aged 7 to 11/12), that's why I kept continue to do it until recently. I didn't know it was unhealthy or harmful. Furthermore, when I google about it, everywhere on the Internet says it's healthy, don't worry, prevents prostate cancer, reduces stress, many people does it, and so on. Even the majority of the Quora questions say so too. Ugh...misleading information. I have something to say about this later in this post too.

Anyway, I believe masturbation brings bad luck no matter what age we do it (be it before or after puberty). I remember last time even when I did it when I was small, it also brought bad luck. Bad things/events would happen after I masturbate. The bad luck effect became even serious after puberty, when I was in secondary school. Basically, or therefore, masturbation had ruined and destroyed my life, and even more seriously after I reached puberty. Continue reading to know what are them.

Also, may I know what is released whenever we achieve orgasm during masturbation before we reach puberty? I remember I felt like some sort of liquid came out...like urine. Do our body/prostate gland produce semen/sticky stuff liquid before puberty? Just wondering...

*** OK...so I do masturbate before puberty, however it didn't affect me seriously yet though. I still remember my mind was still sharp, my face was still clear, I was still good in my studies, people would care about me and give attention to me in school, energetic, no depression, no stuck thoughts, etc.
I remember I got sick when I reached age 11 and after that I was surprised to find out I have acne. Wow, I can't believe my clear-skin face got acne at such a young age. Does puberty start as early as age 11? I'm not sure whether it's related to my masturbation habit or not... Anyway this part is not so important.

I was still overall OK and fine until age 12, although the only negative effect, if really caused by masturbation, is probably just the premature/early pimples/acne. I did very well in my studies and academics. Based on the Internet, puberty for men usually start at age 12. Symptoms aren't obvious yet when I just hit age 12. Oh, and for your information, my birthday is on September so after a few months (the following year), I had go to secondary school after completing primary/elementary school. So by right on the following year I'm still 12 until the next September. Effects seem to have began to arise after a few months, when I entered secondary school. I remember I was still quite social during the last year of primary school. Once entering secondary school (1st year), I seem to begin to have a bit of social anxiety although not so serious yet at the beginning.
This paragraph is about how it ruined my life and the negative effects that I suffered as a result of masturbating in 2015:
The next thing I noticed is, I started to slowly lose my mind...probably the brain fog had started and I wasn't aware of it/didn't know about it. Like I lose my ability to think rationally before acting. I remember I started to make wrong decisions, especially in school. My concentration to lessons had slowly decrease. Over the time, I went to school just to play-play, not to study. I became a busy-body with the school matters, like the class monitor book. I went to school just to wipe the windows, obsessing with the windows instead. Running around the school and sweating, disturbing the most senior (Year 5 of secondary school) class to make fun, etc. Ugh, I feel quite wasted, my purpose in school should be to study and learn but I wasted it so much. In terms of energy, probably still not yet affected as I was still capable of doing all of that. Anyway, overall, I would say the 1st year of secondary school is the year for the onset of the negative effects of masturbation developing slowly, means the year my original true self to gradually fade away and transformed by the devil spirit of masturbation. OK, so this paragraph sums up how masturbation affected me for my 1st year in secondary school - age 12. I guess this is because: we begin to produce testosterone as puberty begins.

The 1st year of secondary school ended. I feel like I didn't really learn much and my academic performance at the beginning was good but then slowly dropped until the end of the year. Wasted... Coming towards the 2nd year of secondary school, masturbation has successfully transformed me into a total monster, useless person, coward, masturbation addict, lazy, etc. My true self was gone and I kind of feel like I aged a lot/feel a lot older.
This paragraph is about how it ruined my life and the negative effects that I suffered as a result of masturbating in 2016:
Masturbation stole my life away, destroyed it, ruined it... The effects had become much more stronger and intense, it affected me the most that year (2016). The mature feeling of pleasure at orgasm has caused me to think I have grown up, made me addicted to it and think I should do it everyday... total destroy! I guess this is because after 1 year of puberty, we produce even more hormones and testosterone...hence the feeling when orgasm becomes greater/stronger and more vulnerable to addiction. It literally damaged my life from all aspects, including my health, organs, social capability, studies, schooling, behavior, just everything. I became dis-motivated to study and hated to go to school. I noticed my handwriting became terrible/worse. Something doesn't sound right as I gradually declined and became worse since around the age I started puberty.
My social anxiety level had became extremely terrible, I preferred staying alone at school, no friends. I would avoid people and tried to run away from people especially when people wanted to be friend with me. I feel REGRET a lot right now for that. Every morning after going to school, while waiting for classes start, I would go to somewhere which nobody is there. I would feel kind of irritated and uncomfortable to be at the crowd/place with many people. Ugh... In short words, it worsen my social anxiety, give up on my studies, always skip school, do badly in the exams, extreme tiredness, feel like an old man, etc. Yes, I feel extremely tired (no energy) everyday. At school, I would feel suffering and just waiting for the time to go back. As of 2016, my brain is no longer able to pay attention to the lessons. Everything the teacher teaches/say will be like "one ear in, one ear out" or "dreaming"/"tired mode", etc. It also caused a lot of bad luck, people started ignoring me at school and made me feel left out which made even dis-motivated to go to school. I felt like stopped schooling. They don't care about me/give attention to me anymore (students and teachers). I would complain about these to my mom everyday and always absent. They (the people at school) didn't really care even when I was absent. I felt like the school doesn't need me anymore. I'm not sure why but based on Internet research, it seems to be because our face become more dull/less attractive/more sad if we masturbate. My academic results weren't so good...I even failed 2 subjects for the End-Of-Year examination because I felt dis-motivated to do the assignment for History and for Geography I didn't do because I didn't know about the assignment as I was always absent. Another bad luck: maybe due to my brain fog,

My anxiety/OCD had also worsen and intensified. I would take more time on my compulsive actions and this would make my mother frustrated. My life became more difficult. My mum would say I purposely waste time or purposely be slow, etc. Ugh, she doesn't understand.

In terms of physical apperance: My mother and grandmother said I was possessed by some bad spirits due to my worsening behavior and change in physical appearance. She even said my face's skin became unhealthy/pale, eyes shrink (look like possessed by some spirit), eyes look tired, face become smaller, etc. I also think I noticed my face was full of pimples and look uglier that time. So, I guess masturbation causes acne! My mother and grandmother would say I'm getting worse as I get older and I was better in primary school, my grandmother would say "hey, but other people like to go to school, you are just a weirdo". I noticed my face became asymmetry like the 1 shown here at the "Happeh Theory" website: https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.p...e-help-all-in-one-thread.162698/#post-1373582.
I even noticed a little bit of hair loss... ugh, this masturbation is really a monster and way too much! Just a bit that it's not really noticeable. Luckily I stopped masturbating before the hair loss becomes obvious... Even my body hair seemed to loss and stop growing...
Hmm... masturbating makes me feel older/like an old man. Hey, does this mean masturbation cause premature aging? No wonder my face looked less healthy, I felt like I lose fat and muscles from masturbating.
I guess that's all for 2016... oh and 1 more thing is: I remember I would masturbate everyday or almost everyday in that year... I think much damage has been done to myself through that... *sigh* I became too addicted.

At the end of 2016, I feel this is all just kind of...weird...unusual. I started to suspect all of these might be related to my masturbation habit. So, heading to the next year. 2017. 2017 can be said as the year of realization and gradual recovery. Well, I guess I'm lucky as I just suffered for a few years before waking up and begin recovery. I saw many other people take many years/a long time, some up to 10 years masturbating destroying themselves before waking up. 2015: Begin to affect/infect 2016: Main destroy/sick year 2017: Time to slowly recover

I still had some sense/alertness about the physical environment though in 2016. However, I started to feel ridiculous when I lose that sense/alertness of the world around me last year (2017). I thought it was normal as a part of getting older, but no, it seems to be an effect of masturbation! I heard masturbation desensitizes us from life as well as damages our cognition ability.
Not just that, it seemed to affect my walking too. My walking became like an old man, no energy. In school, walking is difficult too and climbing up the stairs is really very difficult, lack of energy... Oh, and brain fog makes thinking difficult. I also experienced memory loss, like I feel like an old man and have no more/very little memories of the past. Memory loss also means decreased effectiveness in remembering stuff that I have learned during exams. Masturbation is really a monster...

In 2017, I started to slowly reduce my frequency of masturbating from daily, to once in 2 days, to once in 3-4 days and to once in ~5 days. Even by just reducing the frequency, I feel slight improvements in my life and feel a bit better. I'm starting to get a bit of attention from students and teachers in school again. Things are getting a bit better... My hate on school and dis-motivation to study had decreased a bit which means I became more motivated. My social anxiety had decreased... I'm starting to communicate with people in school a bit... My concentration level is still not yet recovered as my brain still felt horny in class. Energy level still not yet recovered though as these aspects needs 7-10 days PMO-free to recover. 1-2-3-4-5 days is probably not enough. Hmm...I'm wondering if I'm going through everything in too much details/complicated that makes my thread/post too long...
Oh, and guess what. Masturbation depletes so much valuable precious nutrients that it can actually cause this problem: Scars won't heal or the healing is affected/take longer time/etc. Same goes with any imperfections. The healing system will be screwed up too. I had a scar on my palm and it didn't heal/recover (it looked almost the same) since March 2017. However, recently, after abstaining for 20-30 days, I notice more improvements and healing/fading of the scar. My palm color also seems to look healthier. So, masturbation is UNHEALTHY!

Masturbation stole my life away and almost destroyed my future if I don't wake up now.

OK, let's move on to 2018...perhaps I should try to be more simple. OK, I still masturbated in January and February. So, over the time, I noticed my myopia/eyesight became worsen/more poor and eyesight become more blurred. Ugh...based on all the negative effects that I've stated in this thread, masturbation is really just like a TOTALLY 100% POISON/KILLER/DRUGS/CIGARETTES!!! I didn't and couldn't believe masturbation can bring so much side effects...just by ejaculating, I thought it was no big deal, really. As of late 2017 and 2018, masturbation started to become boring for me, as it isn't as fun as it used to be and every time I orgasm/ejaculate, I feel like want to die/feel like dying, my body would feel like "die/shut down/turn off", 0% energy and feel like "I need to sleep now". I guess this is because my body is mature now and can produce proper sperm in huge amounts so that's the result of throwing/wasting them away. I think masturbation must have destroyed most of my body/organ functions.

I plan to quit it FOREVER and NOT ever go back. OK, it's getting nearer to my MAIN problem that I'm frustrated about and it is related to this. After research on the side effects of masturbation, all the information on the Internet seemed to match everything I was facing/experiencing!

My analysis: My quality of life/luck seem to be 100% dependent on the frequency of my masturbation.


So, this year, I was planning to do some experiment of what will happen if I try to abstain from masturbation for a longer time. Throughout my journey of slow recovery in 2017, although I reduced the frequency, I relapsed countless number of times. Because: every time my testosterone levels peek at day 5-6-7, I usually get urges which make me unable to focus on doing anything/activities/life, this made me thought masturbation is necessary from time to time or else I won't be able to handle it. I would also usually feel stressed and emotional on day 5-6-7 but the truth is you have to actually suffer those phases temporarily in order to recover. On those days, your sperm/energy is reproduced and about to be flowed to your whole body for repair/recovery to normal. I made a masturbation log starting from July 2017 to monitor and help me to control the frequency so that eventually I will abstain from longer period of times. But now I plan to quit, which is I am actually already successful. It turns out to fix all my problems in my life and I'm really satisfied! My mindset is actually and truly 100% committed and firm to quit it forever and not ever masturbate again anymore in my life.
OK, before I say the positive effects/major improvements from abstaining from masturbating for a longer period of time, let me explain my real MAIN problem first.
The problem is related to: difficulty in determining/counting the accurate and exact number of days I have done NoFap/abstain from masturbation.
Why? OK, so the last time I actually masturbated fully awake was on 21 February 2018. However, on
day 8/9 of NoFap (2 March 2018), I masturbated at the bed before getting up but it seemed to not leave any side effects at all as a masturbation while fully awake would give, as like my recovery status remains almost 100% the same. I remember that was the day I was still recovering even more. On that afternoon, I started to became alert of my surroundings and started to recall past events (memory retrieval recovery). I also don't feel tired that day as masturbation would usually make us very tired/no energy. HOWEVER,: On that day, I had a stuck thought (related to OCD over dents/scratches) which lasted several days --> a week to recover. This fact has caused me to think maybe the 2 Mar masturbation had affected me in some way, or if not, it could be just the serotonin part not yet recovering after abstaining for just 8 days. I CAN'T determine which one! This causes my brain to have kind of "screwed up" on how to count how many days/the number of days have I done NoFap/abstain from masturbation, which is whether to count from the original "real" last time I masturbated (21 Feb) or the day I masturbated at the bed before getting up at the morning (2 March).

What's strange is: seems that every time I masturbate at the bed after my body woke up but I didn't get up yet, it seems to be fine and doesn't cause any effects at all that a masturbation after getting up.fully awake would. I suspect this is because: (my own theory) At the morning as we have just have woke up and begin to be conscious, most of our body functions/organs/components are still not yet activated/working or functioning. Our energy levels are still quite low. Therefore, when we ejaculate, nothing is affected as most of the nerves/organs are still in "sleep/rest/hibernation" mode, they aren't aware or not able to react to the act of ejaculating/lose of sperm/semen/testosterone... but...this theory of mine doesn't make sense a bit because lack of testosterone means lack of ability to recover... I hope someone can make some research about this.

Is it true that masturbation at the bed before getting up ((at the morning)) doesn't count as a relapse? Looks like every time I do that it at that timing, it doesn't seem to affect anything...

My brain is kind of "screwed up" and quite frustrated by this issue on how to count the number of days I have done NoFap. It's so screwed up that this thought keeps coming up and coming up many times and I have to ruminate/think deeply about it in order to stop/argue with the thought. It's also coming out with other theories such as the masturbation on March 2 had probably affected me just partially/a bit, so I can count it as from 21 Feb @/or 2 Mar (both dates), or I should count from 21 Feb as the 2 March didn't affect anything, I should not count from Mar 2 because there might be some recovery progress which started from 21 Feb, I should count from Mar 2 because I had a stuck thought that day which means it might have affected me, etc. It's even thinking ridiculous stuff such as I'm not really recovering at all/not experiencing proper recovery/positive effects due to the screwed up/messed up day count and that I should masturbate again to fix the day count and re-recover properly again from stretch. Therefore, my brain keeps asking me to masturbate again just for the sake of fixing up the NoFap day count and solve these issues/problems. I usually fight with these thoughts and get rid of them by: "masturbation causes death so just don't do it (Autoerotic asphyxiators/brain deprived of oxygen which is all used up for sexual pleasure)", "it's not worth it to throw away/waste 20-30 days of precious nutrients regain/recovery/progress", "I might not be able to recover if I masturbate again", "if I masturbate again I won't recover as good as this time's", "I don't want to waste my life, I want to experience an everyday 'healthy' me", etc. Really damn frustating!!!

Can anyone here help to give your advises/opinions about this issue? The MAIN problem/thing is: Should I masturbate again just for the sake (1 purpose only) of fixing my NoFap day counter issue? So frustrated about this... I really need answers/best answer for this. If counting from 21 Feb, I've done NoFap for 29 days and if counting from 2 Mar, I've done NoFap for 20/21 days. I don't feel worth it though to masturbate and lose 29 days of nutrients regain/recovery progress. I know the smart choice is to choose to NOT masturbate again forever but if I don't, that issue would exist forever. What do you guys think?

I suggest to those who had just started NoFap/keep relapsing/still addicted to masturbation, can you guys be kind enough to volunteer to do an experiment to help me/to conduct a research whether masturbation on such timing will give side effects or not/counted as relapse or not: as soon as you woke up in the morning and still on your bed/not yet get up, just masturbate. Then, after waking up/throughout your day, observe whether you experience the side effects/negative effectives of masturbation or not as you usually would whenever you relapse/ejaculate and tell me about it. If my theory is true and masturbation won't affect us if we do it at such timing, this could probably bring a change. Maybe we can masturbate at that timing to enjoy the pleasure/fun without any risks. However, my decision would be still not to masturbate even on such timing, for the best.

After stopped masturbating, I became a better person and have a better life (improvements). I feel much younger, healthier and better.
In terms of physical, my acne is healing and my face look better and clearer now. My eyes seem to have became bigger/my face look more alive, the skin color became more healthy. I notice my body hair growing, hair regrowth (the slight hair loss is recovering). I notice more muscle and fat, especially my arms.

Stuff that can't be explained by science start to happen and I receive more good luck. (supernatural powers) At first, I even felt like my life or myself is controlled by God or something. I am starting to get more attention/care from people in school all of a sudden, unlike 2016. My social anxiety had decreased and I become more social. Every day seems to get better as like spirits really exist. I'm not sure whether the asymmetry face effect can be reversed or not though...anyone knows the answer for this?

In terms of health my eyesight had improved too, I still have myopia but it's not that worse anymore, which is 1 of the surprising effects that I have experienced. Actually almost all the positive effects that came out from doing NoFap is a surprise to me. My walking improved a lot, from the slow walking of an old man to walking fast/able to run again like a young man. OCD severity had reduced and I am lesser OCD now. Stuck thoughts also easily go away compared to when I was masturbating. I become more energetic/more energy. Depression/sad feelings/emotional/stress/anxiety/etc. had also seem to go away. I believe masturbation deprives us out of serotonin which causes anxiety/OCD/etc.

In terms of life I'm not lazy anymore. I become more hardworking and productive, motivated to do many things/settle them. Before this, I was quite lazy and only liked to sit all day, thinking of masturbating. I'm more motivated to study now. Oh, and yes, another surprising effect is my brain. My memory improved a lot and I recalled many past events/information that I thought I have lose completely due to aging. They actually still exist but kind of got ruined/covered by brain fog/the side effects of masturbation. My concentration level in class has improved a lot so I now feel much more worth it to go to school. My brain has became somewhat like an "information taker", means able to absorb/receive whatever information that is seen, heard or taught.

In analogy, in terms of comparing to vehicles/cars, masturbation would be like draining all of your engine oil which causes damage to the engine. The engine's functions unable to work well, become broken/impaired, etc. Therefore, the car has less energy and moves slowly like an old car (old person). The petrol pump becomes damaged so it's unable to provide petrol flow to the car. The filter becomes broken too so our brain keeps thinking of those negative thoughts which leads to masturbation (if car: the engine would be smudged by dirt/dirty substances which obstruct movement of the engine parts.

Continued:
I also regained back my sensitivity to life and more alert to my physical surroundings now. I am able to enjoy life again! I'm not the salve of that masturbation evil spirit/urge anymore/no longer dominated by it. Life seems to be going the way it should be/intended way. That's why I said at first it feels like my life is somewhat suddenly controlled by God. I have read about people getting supernatural powers after doing NoFap. Maturation spoils our life. Masturbation screws up our normal body functions/functioning.


Finally, the last part, "Furthermore, when I google about it, everywhere on the Internet says it's healthy, don't worry, prevents prostate cancer, reduces stress, many people does it, and so on. Even the majority of the Quora questions say so too. Ugh...misleading information. I have something to say about this later in this post too."


Referring back to what I have said earlier. Why the medical institutes, doctors, sexual health professionals, doctors are not doing any proper scientific research and experiments about the truth of masturbation? This isn't something difficult at all. In fact, it can be done just by the act of abstaining from masturbation for a period of time. They should be providing the public with accurate and correct information about the truth of masturbation, such as the side effects, harmfulness, negative effects and how toxic it is.
They should publish the real reports/results of their research, instead of keep misleading the public that masturbation is OK and let it continue to destroy many people's lives. And, why do they keep saying it is healthy? Do they even really research about it? Or maybe they thought it's normal to feel like that after masturbation...

Hey, why aren't NoFap making a change about this? Why can't this community declare to the public and announce the truth of masturbation? I also think education about all the harms of the act of masturbation (basically everything about it) should be implemented and taught to teenagers in school.

I guess that's all for this extremely long thread. My sixth sense tells me that I may be doing it wrongly by combining everything into just one very long thread. If so, please correct me or help to split it. I'm not sure if anyone will read this whole thread due to its length but I hope you do as usually long means interesting. I'm not sure if there will be any replies of "TLDR". I'm not even sure whether this thread is appropriately posted in the correct subforum or not. So, just correct me if anything is wrong as I'm new here on NoFap. I created an account 9 days ago and this is my first time posting.
Anyway, my hope is: someone on this site who is kind, generous, wise and knowledgeable enough to read my whole thread and answer all my doubts/questions stated/mentioned in this thread.

 

Really? But, I have read people experiencing all the negative effects again whenever once they relapse (brain fog, tiredness, etc.). What you said doesn't make sense. I think once we relapse/ejaculate, all the sperms/testosterone are released/lost hence the loss of improvements.
Are you sure about that? Besides that, I'm talking about masturbation at the bed before getting up in the morning when our body just woke up. I think probably masturbating at such time doesn't reverse the improvements but masturbating at other times does. I hope you can give a proper answer about this.

 

Oh I see... I still need advice on 1 more thing. Do you think I should masturbate one more time just for the sake of fixing my NoFap day count issue? Do you recommend me to do so? Do you think it's a good or bad idea? If I do so, the last time I masturbate will not be at the bed before getting up in the morning masturbation and therefore will definitely be counted as a relapse/easier to count for me. However, I feel it's not worth it to lose 20-30 days of precious valuable nutrients regain/recovery progress. My addiction to masturbation has already disappeared. I don't want to deteriorate my health/reverse the positive effects just for this. My decision would be rather not masturbate anymore forever but my brain keeps frustrating me and asking me to masturbate just because of this issue.
Sorry to keep mentioning that one more relapse will make my improvements disappear, this is my observation though if I masturbate at other times/not on the bed in the morning before getting up. Just need your advice on I should masturbate again or not for that one purpose only despite of having recovered from the addiction/commuted to quit forever.

 

Do you mean it's better to count the masturbation on 2 March which is carried out on the bed before getting up as a relapse too? So you mean I should count my NoFap days number from that date, am I right? Is it wrong to count from the one on 21 February which is done at other time (not on bed at morning before getting up)?

 

Oh... Anyway, do you think every time we do act of masturbation, there is a risk it will cause death? I read stuff that masturbation deprives our brain of oxygen as all the oxygen and blood/stuff/etc. are flowed/used for the sexual pleasure during orgasm. It's called " Autoerotic asphyxiators", am I right?

And, do you mind to take your time slowly to read my full story (in this thread) and answer all my other doubts/questions mentioned there? It's extremely long though. So, you can take your time slowly to do so. I don't mind if it takes a few days. I would really appreciate it if someone can answers all my questions that I have related to my masturbation story of my life.

 

Oh... today, I had some sexual thoughts when looking at my arms and looking at a guy's (teenager) face on Facebook...my penis erected and I felt like a little bit of fluid came out, I didn't masturbate though.
Does this count as a relapse?

What is the fluid that I felt have came out when my penis erect? Is it just urine or semen/sperm (like what an ejaculation releases)?

Will it give any harmful effects by just thinking of such dirty thoughts and looking at those (my arms/face/sexual stimulation) without masturbating? I heard even by just doing that, the brain will be flooded with dopamine.

 

Hello? Why do people stop replying me after I keep asking and asking? Is it annoying or wrong to do so in NoFap?

 

Hmm...thanks very much for your comments, I appreciate it.You seem experienced, do you mind answering these parts that you missed in the full story of this thread:
Secondly, another question, does masturbation before puberty leave any negative side effects like masturbation during/after puberty do? Seems like masturbation didn't really affect me when I did it when I was still small (aged 7 to 11/12), that's why I kept continue to do it until recently. I didn't know it was unhealthy or harmful. Furthermore, when I google about it, everywhere on the Internet says it's healthy, don't worry, prevents prostate cancer, reduces stress, many people does it, and so on. Even the majority of the Quora questions say so too. Ugh...misleading information. I have something to say about this later in this post too.

Also, may I know what is released whenever we achieve orgasm during masturbation before we reach puberty? I remember I felt like some sort of liquid came out...like urine. Do our body/prostate gland produce semen/sticky stuff liquid before puberty? Just wondering...

 

Oh... can you answer just one more question as you seem experienced too: does masturbation before puberty leave any negative side effects like masturbation during/after puberty do? Seems like masturbation didn't really affect me when I did it when I was still small (aged 7 to 11/12), that's why I kept continue to do it until recently. I didn't know it was unhealthy or harmful.

Maybe it doesn't because our body/hormones are not yet fully developed, not yet producing sperm, etc. so whenever we ejaculate it doesn't leave any effects.

 

Oh... anyway does looking at any pornography that stimulates sexual arousal mode and being at such mode gives any side effects/negative effects like a masturbation would do? Do you know the answer for this? I heard even that should be avoided as it floods our brain with dopamine. Does this mean even looking at porn without masturbating/orgasm/ejaculation is also harmful?