My 40 days of struggle

Hi friends, I’ve been fighting addiction for 8 years, now I’m 21 years old. 40 days is the longest time I managed to hold out, but yesterday I got a cold and lost control of myself. I want to say that I read in some book that when you get sick with a cold, then the chance that you give up is very high, I used to think that this is not so but now I understand that this is true as it happened to me several times. I want to talk about my method that helped me last 40 days. This method consists in developing compassion for all living beings. This means that if you are strong, if you control yourself, then the evil in the world will become less.
It’s true, the world will become really better, because all the changes in the world need to start with yourself.

The first 20 days it was very easy for me, I did not think about porn and guys (I'm gay).

from 21 days thoughts began to attack me, but I won thanks to meditation and yoga.

When 30 days passed, a big sadness came to me, I began to think that I could not find a husband for myself, that due to the fact that I was trying to defeat addiction, I could not create a relationship with a guy, I began to engage in active sports, boxing, this helped me and thoughts were gone.

When day 35 came, I stopped doing yoga, I thought that I had defeated nature, it was my mistake. I caught a cold on day 38, but continued to play sports. When day 39 came, I gave up and watched porn, now these thoughts did not leave me, I lost control.
Tonight I lost this battle, but the war continues. I will look for a new approach, I will definitely win this entry and share my experience with you. Please, if you know something that will help me - help me. I am from Russia, it is difficult for me to translate all the articles, please if you know articles that will help me - give me a link. I am starting a new fight, I think that now I have to last at least 80 days

I want to conclude: Never stop doing yoga and sports. If you allow yourself a little weakness, you will definitely lose I wish you good luck!


40 days NoFap

I think I need to keep some kind of diary, I’ll leave a note here every 10 days, you can follow my struggle