Monk Mode

Welcome, Karmajoy

I haven't seen an "official" definition of "monk mode", but here is how one person described it:

Basically, "hard mode" (no porn, no masturbation, no orgasm) plus no entertainment and no junk food. This sounds like the plan you already have. You're good to go.

As for "how long", that depends on why you are doing this. Are you doing "monk mode" for a certain amount of time, and then plan to do "No Porn, No Masturbation"? How will you know when you've done "enough"?

If you want ensure you feel many of the benefits, we talk about 90 days. If you goal is to never use porn again - never even want to use porn again, people talk about 400 or 500 days.

Your call

Hope this helps.

-EK

 

What do you think you should do? You make the rules here, but only for you. We will support you, keeping your own rules.

-EK

 

Hard Mode is "officially" [link] defined as "No porn and no masturbation and no orgasm". "Monk mode" goes beyond that, excluding things like video games, etc. But remember, there is no authority that defines the meaning of "monk mode".

-EK

 

Perfect. A very clear statement.

The site offers various tools for tracking progress and drawing support. The primary tools are joining an event or challenge [link] and starting a journal [link].

Your initial post shows you are highly motivated and willing to make large lifestyle changes. That's good, and it also carries the hazard of taking on too much, too fast. Start with the minimum (see below) and add more as needed.

You asked for advice. I have some experience with PIED. My suggestions are:

1. Read the List of Rebooting Resources. [link]
2. Gather support by joining a challenge or starting a journal, or both. You are 41, so your journal would be in 40+ [link]. It's an active, supportive group of people.
3. Commit to "hard mode" (no porn, no masturbation, no orgasm) for an initial period you are comfortable with. Not sure? Try 90 days.
4. If you want to go beyond "hard mode", the first thing to eliminate is naked pics, and the second thing, anything NFSW.

Once again, welcome.

-EK

 

It's not about what you "can" or "can't" do. It's about what stirs up sexual desires and urges. It's easier to have a long, healing streak when you avoid watching things that arouse you.

Just get started, and don't worry about "the rules". If you want to address your PIED, then stop masturbating to porn (PMO). If you do something (like watch a sex scene) and it makes you PMO, then don't do that anymore. Simple.

-EK