Hello, 33 years old, and on day 8 of PMO. I'll try to keep it brief - after my wife found out I had cybersex, she kicked me out of the house and is very set on divorce. We do have couples therapy scheduled for Jan 7. I am currently at my parents house. I still go home every day to spend a few hours with our newborn, and during that time my wife and I are able to talk like normal for most of the time. When conversation turns to our future, she comes across as very set in her wanting a divorce, while I am trying to better myself and work on our issues together. I am trying to focus on a better diet, exercising regularly, and otherwise using my free time for productive activities. However, the thought of losing her and my feelings of loneliness are a huge damper on motivation. I can feel ready to conquer the world one moment and completely crippled the next. I've contemplated dating apps - just to find a connection. I know this is a bad idea for many, many reasons, so I haven't pulled the trigger on that. I'm just not sure how to combat the loneliness, and to combat the thoughts of her moving on and finding something new, while I stay stuck where I am. Its a hard pill to swallow, because I caused the situation I am in due to my lack of control.
Women, most women, will never understand. Heck, I had a fiance that was just as much into porn as me. But she'd go through my search history and take issue with watching too many skinny girls, asians or whatever. They'll always be insulted, one way or the other. Most women need to realize we, men, are visual creatures, and we are exposed to this at an early age and effectively hooked...for life. I think you two need a counselor that can communicate these ideas and mend the relationship, reconcile. But you're here, and that's a huge step already, especially in the event of a new relationship. I wish you all the best!
Dating apps are never the solution, do not use them. The make a fake reality of who ppl are, and all are judged only by looks. And, remember: they only want money, they don't care if u get a match. For that reason alone its best to stay away from it.
