It never goes away.

My brothers no matter what I do the desire just grows stronger. I do jerk myself off I’ll admit. If I don’t I end up spending a lot of money. I’m more vicious with the way I see the world. Porn disgusts me and angers me to see.

I tried watching it, I’ll admit I was aroused. Then it was one of the guys that pissed me off. You just want to rip them out of the screen and stop it.

Im starting to really believe everyone is worse than me. These sick urges in everyone, makes me paranoid. When I finally kinda start feeling compassion. It’s ripped away, these desires make you want to just fight. I have no sympathy for anyone who would go against me. Someone cheats, someone lies, someone doesn’t even look in your eyes.

You should be intense about your judgment, I used to not be. All this shit now making me wish to stay with my own kind. Now it’s clear who’s who and we just have to only care about certain people.

Society is making you feel like a loser, feel like shit about your pointless life. For sure I know I don’t want to be alone for this life. I certainly don’t want to lay in bed next to any of you. There’s no women here, just a bunch of us homos holding a circlejerk.