Is it Solitude or is it Loneliness?

Loneliness = Gollum
Solitude = Superman

So another thing happened in my life, not to me, but to my wife, through her father.
Anyway, being born and raised in South Mississippi, most of us are born and raised with certain "red clay" convictions. 1) You stay with your own kind. Birds of a feather flock together.
2) Marriage is between a man and a woman. It was Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve.
(I'm not doing this to smear or defame anyone, just stating the facts and if you want to get into debates over it, please feel free to PM your opinion)
Well, recently a woman has come into my blood-father-in-laws life who goes completely against all convictions he has lived in his whole life, was raised in his whole life and has taught my wife her whole life.
(If you wish to know what the details are,please PM me, but I believe they are too controversial for the public and I dont want my own beliefs to get in the way of what I have to say.)
This got me to thinking, what was it that caused this man to take over years devoted to a "code of moral conduct" and just throw it away over a woman. Why give up something that made you, you, for a woman you've barely known a month? Why ignore obvious warning signs that this woman is unstable and a dangerous stage five clinger? Why pursue something that you know is going to hurt and possibly damage relationships with your own loved ones?
The only answer I can think of is he was feeling a hole, he was feeling loneliness. And when you feel that nagging sensation or fear of I'm gonna die alone and noone is going to know I'm gone, then you start looking for ways to prevent that from happening. You start sacrificing parts of yourself for people that in your normal stable self would've considered sub-par. You let the fear losing control of your life start making decisions and running you. The idea of not being noticed, that selfishness or pridefulness of not being loved or important or missed, becomes like "The Precious", and you would go so far as to demean yourself and hurt others in order to protect it.
Solitude is the opposite of that. Superman retired to his Fortress of Solitude to work on himself. He did not rely on others to do his repair work, he repaired himself. His self worth stemmed from a reliance on self. He put into himself of himself, so that he had this unending resource of self to give to others. Through this, he was able to build up relationships and not have to crave someone's dependence, but his solitude allowed him to appreciate himself and actually enjoy someone else for who they were.
Loneliness is selfish and self centered.
Solitude is self knowing, can be self less, and is open.

 

I agree. But in the end it is swapping one entity or identity for another