Incels or 'nice guys' (involuntarily celibates) has porn/media affected their view on females?

Damm i was so naive in my early dating years, all the time stuck in freindzone. Than i finally discover red pill and start learning this stuff. I remember one line which really open my eyes. She is angel for you but hoe for someone else.

 

My opinion of incels:

 

Hey, you didn't leave after all!

Anyway, I get what they're saying, but... who would eat a hotdog on the ground outside?

 

That's the point...

Not yet at least. Lol

 

I unknowingly wore the "nice guy mask" to hide the incel underneath. Spending too much time on the internet (not just porn, but things involving MGTOW, MRA, SJWs) warped the shit out of my mind. I was so angry and depressed all the time. I told myself that my issue was with only feminism, but I realize now that I hated women. It wasn't until I found the "Iron Pill" that I realized that "Red Pills" (MGTOW) and "Black Pills" (Incels) had it wrong. I truly believe I understand the truth and I don't hate women anymore. I have hope again that we can bring order to this whole mess.

 

I used to be a not-so-nice guy. Some women like it, but many don’t. What many women care about (at least what I’ve come to experience in my life) is confidence. It illustrates someone who would protect them from anything, from the bad guys to the terrifying spiders. Someone who would act on what they believe, or have a drive to progress in life, rather than let everything pass through them in a passive manner like a lot of “nice” guys tend to do. The “bad” guy is sexy because he has confidence, he just unfortunately has confidence in all the wrong ideas.

It applies here. A nice guy let’s people walk all over him. That’s not quite confident. Instead, be a good guy: be confident and stand up for what you believe in.

 

I did went MGTOW for short while. Until I realized how many incels and other bitter, women hating, self pitying, incel-like people have infested into that community. So I left it quite quickly. I am still glad I stumbled on it cos it made me aware of some cold truths. But hating women because of dark side of their nature makes just as little sense as a plant hating the sun for it's ability to burn. Besides, masculinity and being a male has it's shadow too. So we don't really have any right to throw stones at anybody.

I don't think it does. At least not in my experience. If anything it made me more sexually liberal and open minded, which is a good thing in my opinion. Of course that came with consequences as well, such as addiction and somewhat distorted way of how sex should be performed. But other than that ideologically I don't think it had any negative impact.

 

Whelp, that flew right over my head.

 

Yeah, only a tiny portion of them actually have female friends. Most really are just incels.

 

Agree with a lot of this. I was always a 'nice guy' rather than a 'good guy' as a teenager/early 20s. i.e. didn't get anywhere because I didn't have the confidence at the time to take the lead. Suddenly things improved once I sorted out my own issues and TOOK RESPONSIBILITY for my own life (which included asking for help!)

Looking back, porn didn't cause this problem. But it slowed me from addressing it (why face your own inadequacies or learn how the world really is when you can retreat to a perfect fantasy?).
Porn also gives unrealistic views on what is appealing to women in the bedroom.
So in short I think it fuels an existing problem. EDIT: I'm 32 and at least was porn free until 18. Most teenagers now are not, so this may be fuelling the problem much more than I think. Especially given 'incels' are a relatively new thing to my knowledge

As for incels - I can completely empathise/understand why they feel/think the way they do. But I can't sympathise. Because they have thrown in the towel instead of taking responsibility. They have chosen to stay as boys rather than become men (being a man to me is much more than how many women you can bed). So their misfortune becomes the fault of other men or the women they 'like'. That doesn't seem like a nice guy at all.

Perhaps if I was someone more motivated by playing the field (and having no luck) rather than a 'relationship' person, I would feel differently.

In fairness I don't think the current feminist backlash is helping when it comes to this sort of thing. There a lot of confusing messages out there for young, already confused men.

 

I'm working on becoming the good man. Strong enough to stand up for myself, but still kind. It's like walking a tightrope....so easy to fall to one side or the other.

 

I like the tight rope analogy. I've always thought of 'assertiveness' in a similar way. Easy to fall one side or the other but not loads of room to tread where you want to be.
But with practice it gets easier....

 

Be careful of that though. Miagi put it best in karate kid:

My uncle, who knows a lot of politics kinda explained something similar. When he was growing up, most people were in the middle: socialist, liberal, cons. Now, though, with everything going on, there's a lot more people on far-left and far-right. Good guys getting called "cucks" by one side and "assholes" by another. Conservatives getting called nazis by one and conservicucks by the other. The middle of the road, although noble to me, can be very dangerous. Personally, I think it's worth the risk. If I do go down, atleast it's with my morals still intact.

 

I guess you're not THAT hungry...

 

I don't identify with those people you speak of at all, but there was a dark period of my life around 19-22 when my head was in a bad place, I was going through alot, I have a long dramatic history with my (single/taken on and off) mother and sisters, been hurt in serious relationships, even had women I didn't even know say rude and condescending things to me on multiple occasions for no reason, and it did feel like most (not all) women were evil and the root of all evil. It wasn't one factor that made me think like that, it was multiple factors, my environment, my experiences, my bad state of mind from it all.
But once I started fixing my issues, got a breathe of fresh air, cleared my head, changed my environment, it allowed me to look at the bigger picture, see all people as humans for what they are, I stopped viewing women so negatively.

 

I don't get the hate for guys who have trouble hooking up with women or for guys who want to be single? I get people are tribal and tend to hate anyone different and are quick to look down on others and despise them, but being so open about it and direct to the point rather than making up another reason to justify their hate is unusual.

 

Yeah if incels are a growing problem for society, then that is society's problem. And as far as I'm concerned, society can eat it, it can reap what it sows

 

I haven't looked in to the incel "community" at all, but it would seem that there is a double standard going on in contemporary society. We want men to be less traditionally masculine and "share their feelings" but when guys like the incels complain about things we tell them to shut up. Can't have it both ways.