I'm just done with my PMO journey... I'm so fucking tired of all of flashbacks

My anxiety is acting up like crazy... Recently I started to doubt... If hugging my pillow count as relapse since my penis against the pillow feels good? Also how about getting erection against my pants feel good count as relapse? Sometimes...
How about i intentionally got an erection, and it is rubbing to feel good? If that also count as relapse then i probably relapsed long gone...i fucking hate my life

I'm so done now... I don't even know what to do anymore

 

Yea man... While I was on nofap for years, I wasn't actually thinking about all these, cause i usually stick to the main things is PMO.... Recently i starting to overthinking, flashbacks, cause me to doubt whether it was relapse or not...
But in your point of view, do you consider those activities are relapse? I feel like the only solution is to cut my dick off, so i won't scared of getting relapse again...

 

I don't know what to do man... Im so done with it

 

We definitely similar when it comes to something isn't intentionally... But for the erection against my pant etc... I just don't know what to do about it, i could not completely get rid of my nature of being male, I'm still single, of course i can get horny from to time to time, i haven't orgasm for years imagine the tension of wanted to release... I might wanted to get erect to feel good at least, to reduce my horniest also i did not masturbate... But... I'm so exhausted man i could not believe these things considered relapse...