Gentleman, this year so far has been rough. Many victories but many disappointments as well - The reason I keep relapsing I am realizing... more than anything is the fact that I MO to Fantasy (porn-inspired) when I am in bed. It keeps happening. Now I know here are some of my triggers: 1) Feelings of general horniness, imagination runs wild when I lie down in bed, it's crazy 2) Longing for intimacy and sex... if I can't get it right then and there I imagine a hot girl Ive desired and FMO.. 3) Feelings of a failed attempt at getting with a girl romantically and the hopeless that comes with it I am tired of being frustrated ... I have found that this is more of an issue for me than looking at porn or p-subs... But the thing is FMO... leads to PMO. Eventually fantasy runs dry and I wanna look up more stuff. What are some practical steps I can take to stop this...to dissociate horniness and fantasy with lying in bed? To just stop and prevent myself from masturbating to fantasy while in bed? Thanks and please help because if I overcome this, I can get this shit out of my life for good. I can be rid of this bad habit I've perfected since I was 11.
This is a hard one. I kept a bedtime hygiene journal for a while to track my night time habits. Don't lay in bed unless you are ready to fall asleep. The bed is for sleep only. Don't read in bed. Don't watch TV in bed. Train your mind and body to fall asleep as soon as you get in bed. This is difficult to start, but is worth it. Put your phone and/or your router/laptop/wifi antenna in the basement or the car at bedtime. This makes it so you have to get up and walk a significant distance in order to get to P. One of the reasons relapse is easy in bed is because you are tired and your willpower is sapped. You are also usually half-asleep. Wear a belt to bed to break the habit of touching yourself in your sleep or right before sleep Don't go to bed until you are completely exhausted. Read a book etc. until you can barely keep your eyes open. Don't watch anything even remotely triggering before bed. No youtube. No TV. No movies. No caffeine before bed. Consider cutting yourself off six hours before you go to sleep. You may need to adjust this based on how sensitive you are to caffeine. Exercise will make you fall asleep faster and sleep better. Avoid anything depressing or emotional before bed. Focus on positive things, and no matter how lonely you feel don't feed it. You can do this. After conquering the bed, you may find that your addiction reasserts itself during the daytime, but this will be more manageable.
Follow the advice flame0. Also consider taking a brief cold shower before bed. You will feel that your stress has eased and your urges will be way weaker.
