I want to last longer for my gf! Can anyone help me?

Focus on foreplay, treat her nicely, even while not in bed. Show her love. Prove it to her that you have a lot more to offer. She will not think you're selfish if you finish her first and then get done yourself. It's okay to prematurely ejaculate when it's few of your first encounters.

 

Buddy, yours is a classic case of performance anxiety. The more you try to last longer and perform well, the more you fail. The thing is you become damn excited with the sensations and then fear strikes in that you would ejaculate and that ultimately happens as well. Now to handle this, you have to be mentally and physically sound. To be physically sound, do some workout at least 4 times a week (anything that you enjoy no need to push yourself) and have a really good diet supported with proper sleep. But the most important part is the mental side of yours. You would have heard that saying "Get out of your head". That's what you gotta do. While feeling those sensations you need to stop giving attention to all those bullshit thoughts in your head like "oh my god what the fuck...I'm gonna", you know something of that sort. Don't give a fuck to those thoughts. Instead, just breathe and feel. You might fail a few times but eventually you would be fine. You know we forget this one simple fact that its not just about pleasing your partner. It's also letting your partner please you. How would you feel if you are unable to please your partner? Your partner might also feel that way if you don't let her. So, stay out of her way. And the goal of pleasing your partner, that brings the anxiety into this like, what if she's not pleased with my performance? So, stop this bullshit right away. Stop putting pressure on your partner that she should feel satisfied by you. And, at the same time you gotta stop being afraid from ejaculating early. If you do it, fine. No need to regret that. That doesn't mean your partner is dissatisfied. Your partner would however be certainly dissatisfied from your lack of confidence. No need to overthink. Accept and move ahead, you'll be fine. Hope this helps.

 

I think many of the responses in this thread are well fleshed out.

Your problem is not uncommon, and it is not incurable. Simply calming yourself, enjoying your partner, and focusing on having a good time is very likely to help you last at least a couple minutes longer. Simply having sex with this girl DOES please her, more than you probably understand. If you thrusted in her 10 times and she had an uncontrollable, toe-curling orgasm, you'd feel pretty fucking cool haha; she feels something like this, I guarantee you.

Now, while the gratification of pleasing your partner with no pleasure for yourself is an awesome feeling, over time, it can lead to a sexual frustration, so it would be wise to find a solution to your issue. The last step in increasing your sexual stamina is always having frequent sex, not only so that your body isn't starved of stimulation (and therefore takes a little longer during sex), but so you can recognize the feelings and actions that lead you to orgasm. It took me about 2 months after my first reboot to discover that certain positions, speeds, and behaviors by my partner led me to orgasm in seconds. Now during sex, I avoid those until I am ready to finish, so that the experience is mutually pleasurable for my partner and I.

If your problem is caused by porn or masturbation, I would recommend not doing either. While porn is known to cause PIED, a severe physiological condition, it has also been documented to give premature ejaculation. The exact mechanisms still elude researchers, but the reason is expected to be psychological. Quitting porn until you see your partner may make you very sensitive and prone to finishing quickly at first, but in the long-run, quitting porn always has great effects on stamina, performance, and pleasure. Additionally, while masturbation is often seen as a way for a guy to increase his stamina, it is well documented it can lead to men experiencing shorter sexual stamina. I would also advise, in the long-run, to avoid masturbation as a solution, and in general, for this problem.

The best thing to do would be to talk to your partner about this. Tell her you think she's beautiful, she is sexy, and you love having sex with her. She makes you feel amazing, and you just want to please her more. If you are skilled at oral sex with her, she may not care at all about about the PE; I would highly advise trying this with her and improving your head game, not only to make up for your other affliction, but because girls in general find oral sex much more pleasurable. If you are finishing quickly, it's also likely you can go multiple rounds, which not only means more sex, but you will likely last longer the next time around. If she wants to find a solution with you, talk to her about the steps you both will have to take (stopping porn, not having sex for a while, etc), and that you two will have to have sex frequently (1-2 times a week) for around 2 months for you to become fully functional.

If you have other questions hmu. I also have a huge cache of articles you can check out. I would advise looking at the site Your Brain on Porn for more info

 

P is in your mind . When you are with her . You have subconscious images which overstimulate your brain when with her .
You got to abstain from P, first and foremost .
Then, you got to practice sex with her. It will get better if you ditch P .
Esp.. you can do it again after a pause and last longer .
Healthy lifestyle is important too .
My longest last was like hour and halve, but it all depends on what is going on. I've been a 5 blows too.
This is to say, that it is all possible, trainable. Got to do your exp. research, talk with her .

But no P, it overstimulates you and you pre-mature .

10 minutes is not that long and you can do it . Give your intimate connection time, it will happen .
Important is to not flex down there and to breathe .
But as I said, not everything is controllable. Though, forget about artificial stimulus again, it over stimulates your mind and make you release quicker than you want, cause your subconscious is doing it for you .