I've been doing NoFap for two years. All this time, I've wanted to do NoFap, but I don't want to do NoFap with the urges that come with it. I would rather give into the urges and let go of the pain than to try fight the urges. I've gone this entire time thinking that I signed up for NoFap with the urges when in reality I signed up for NoFap without them. I want to have my life without porn or masturbation, and I don't want to edge for 3 hours straight every single time I relapse or binge, and I don't want to feel trapped, but I want to at least see that I'm a mess and know that I want to PMO instead of fighting the urges. I play piano, play guitar, workout, go outside for walks, read, meditate, journal, etc, but none of that matters if I am not willing to genuinely fight the urges right? I just need help. Please if anyone sees this please just help me. I've made a plan and everything but I just need someone to help me. I don't want to be a slave anymore. Before in my previous posts I said I was no longer a slave, and that I would never do it again, but that was just to give myself the assurance that I would never do it again (Easier said that done) To lie to myself to comfort myself. I don't want to stay stuck anymore, but I can't fight urges cause I don't want to. I want to have the want and I'm sorry if this is really confusing but please just help me. I've made a plan if I slip up that won't detrimentally affect me I will continue to learn about this but I just need help in this situation
Hello, JoeTalityyy! I think that your problem can be solved in small steps, with small results, but which will slowly bring you closer to what you want: to have control of your life. For a start, you'll have to organize your addiction a little. Yes, to organize your vice, because you saw that you can't escape all of a sudden. The first step is to use PMO only at home. No P on the phone in public places. PMO just be at home. No sexual activity or thought outside the home. It's not easy at first, thoughts are hard to control. Once you have established that everything related to PMO happens in your home, you will begin to control this behavior. For a start you will be careful what kind of P clips you will watch. The less out of the ordinary, the better. Don't look at P too much before moving on to M. This is to prepare you, gradually, to move on to the next step. If men claim to use M to relax and get rid of stress, then let's stop bombarding our brains with P. So try M without P. It's not all you want, but you're getting closer to holds control. P is very harmful to the brain because it stimulates it as nothing can do in real life. Only drugs can have the effect that P has on the brain. Once you give up P, it will be easier for you to be in control. Your mind will forget, after a while, all the images seen in P. Once you have reached phase M without P, you will be able to try to reduce the frequency of M. It is important not to use M in compulsive mode, but in a programmed way. Give yourself M as a reward, not as a medicine for pain or anxiety. The next step is to start reducing the time you use for M. Then reduce the number of M in a week. Important: do not M several times a day. Equally important: no M in two consecutive days. Let your body and brain rest! M is not food or water that you need every day. These are small steps, but you will feel that you are beginning to take control. And that will be good for your psyche. And you will gain confidence in yourself and be proud of your achievements. Once you want to have a normal sex life with a partner then it is possible to give up M forever. Step by step. Take it easy and you will feel good! Good luck and I expect good news from you! P. S. I apologize if the sentences are not very correct, I used Google Translate, English is not my native language.
It all starts in the mind. Control your thoughts and you'll control your actions concerning PMO. This is the key to everything. Once you get going on a protracted number of days off this addiction, you'll feel better and want to continue. The feeling I have at my point in this new lifestyle is something I don't want to relinquish just to have an orgasm (and I was pretty damn addicted to PMO).
