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I have reached a long streak but fearing relapse

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by Satori2sophistication, Jan 28, 2024.

  1. Satori2sophistication

    Satori2sophistication Fapstronaut

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    Hey kings
    So , i have reached on a long streak now and it going amazing. Quitting porn feels like a relief that a burden is uplifted from my head. The level of self control i have found inside me is amazing. Calmly enjoying solitude, it's blissful. I can literally be in a closed room, all i need is just water to drink and that's all , no human connection, no food , no talking and still i will be blissful and satisfied. Now from that state of mind there is no approval needs from outside world and im going out in the world without any sort of expectation and negative attachment, all self sufficient, participating and indulging with the world. Morning sunlight feels so warm and loving.
    But back in my mind there are some doubt
    1). In past, i have relapsed after long streaks only,
    Only time i have relapsed was very early morning.
    For me In morning, around 2-3-4 Am Urges are the strongest. In past i have relapsed half asleep only to wake up to realise that what happened.
    Most of my relapse have happens early morning while in sleeping. So , right now as i have reached a good healing time , again im fearing that to happen again.
    2). After a month or two , some fantasies starts playing in the background in the mind , sort of im working or reading and i don't even realise the fantasies are playing unconsciously. How do i get over these fantasies. Keeping yourself busy is good techniques and it's kinda for short - termed (although short term is important too ) , how do i put that out from the roots in long run ?
     
    Damian_Wayne likes this.
  2. bken

    bken Fapstronaut

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    The relapses after long streaks are the worst, after a while you start thinking that you're probably recovered or that porn is no longer a problem for you and that doing it just once isn't going to be a big deal, that it isn't going to affect you in any sort of way. While you may get away with 1 relapse after a long streak, the danger here is that the very addictive nature of what you are watching or fantasizing about will find a way to draw you back to your habit, leading to a second relapse, and so on.
    If you like many others have experienced some sort of negative consequence as a result of feeding your habit, this could be shyness, laziness, a bad temper, or maybe you've been diagnosed with depression/anxiety, this alone, these consequences should really serve as a reminder of what will play out should you keep relapsing. It really is an evil habit and you will find that your discomfort peaks around the times you are falling back into these patterns.
     
    Perseverance _14 likes this.
  3. Satori2sophistication

    Satori2sophistication Fapstronaut

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    I understand man ,
    I keep this always in my mind , one peak and it will burn you away
    I don't peak anymore. I have done that in the past. it's a huge trap sort of a build up , slowing resulting to edging and one day.... Boom ! , back to that neurotic habit.
    Like all, i too deal with diagnosed depressed and anxiety, so loneliness was the prime issue which lead me to my downfall with porn.
    Im healing from that too.
     
    bken likes this.
  4. Olympus2567

    Olympus2567 Fapstronaut

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    If you relapse once after awhile it’s not like all of the benefits disappear. But if you dwell on it and make it worse than it is it’ll mess you up. Just keep going and if you hit a speed bump don’t let it ruin your progress.
     
    bken and Satori2sophistication like this.

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