I have noticed people often treat me different when I have relapsed or binged

It also appears the level of this difference corresponds with how bad the relapse is. However, this difference seems to be alleviated or even eliminated if for some reason there is something else that gives me extreme confidence after a relapse, or if I feel less bad about myself for having relapsed.

This difference is also extremely reduced when I am on stimulant drugs which increase dopamine in the brain.

So I think the difference is in dopamine. Confidence increases dopamine as well as stimulants. Porn downregulates dopamine receptors.

However, the key question is, is this difference real or imagined? As in, are people really treating me differently? Or is it just that my perception changes?

When I am on a long streak I always assume the best, and assume people like me or at least have no reason to dislike me, and that even if they do dislike me, it's not my fault. I always assume the most positive. After relapse, it's the opposite.

So are people really treating me differently due to some vibe change? Or is my mind playing tricks on me? is it a mix of both?