I feel so incompetent, fapped all night to humiliating genres

That just sucks, try using that sadness and anger to redirect your energy tonight. Stay off the screen, get some air instead, watch an old war movie, nothing with pretty girls lol. All you can do is reset and try again to just stay away from it.

 

When you already know that porn has made you hollow, you need to just shout on that addiction " Fuck you porn !! I wont be your slave".. Just say this whenever you feel like watching it

 

I agree with others. Your disgust after and willingness to recognize things for what they are IS a step in the right direction. Part of getting better is getting sick and tired of being sick and tired.

 

Good point. I think also that adding something else (often exercise) starts to shift the balance away from the problematic behaviour.

 

It is not porn.
It is your anxiety.
Start with interrupting your inner patterns by doing affirmations and mantras.
I am strong. I am clean. I am .....
And also do some physical exercises.
Fill your mind with peace and love.
It takes few years but i can guarantee you, it is absolutely possible to be 100% free and 100% happy.
Don't be hard on yourself. Fall thousand times but don't blame yourself once.

 

You have to be gentle on yourself.
Deep inside you hate yourself and that is why you are escaping to porn.

 

I think you shouldn't beat your self up. I think porn and sex is much more complicated than we think. I think there becomes a bottleneck in our lives were stress trauma etc etc forces people to find relief

The fact that you say you've been on medication for depression and stress indicates just that excessive stress is part of the reason you use porn to try and self sooth.
we all do it men and women .

This is normal . But obviously a concern because porn we use and abuse it just like anything else in society drugs alcohol sex porn what do you think people are trying to do .... Escapism

. I'm right there with you been trying to quit for years but keep failing and going back simply because the stress In my life can be overwhelming without very little let up or resolution l.

The world expects you to put up or shut up and so we can lead to addiction

I would advise you to focus on taking back control in your life and find a healthy outlet in which you can draw pleasure and satisfaction and one that doesnt bring you feelings of shame guilt .

This day and age we hear too much misery in the news we see it everyday in society . Don't be one that falls through the cracks and let this cacophony of abuses beat you down everyday and be forced to find ways of escapism.

Find something that focuses your mind for the future for your future self this is what humans thrive on we thrive on long-term goals and we press on this brings us satisfaction and a sense of fulfillment and it becomes harder to throw in the towel and become depressed .

Stay strong and overcome would be my advise . Were all.struggling with the same shit