I am stuck in life. Social dynamics.

Discussion in 'Self Improvement' started by horny nerd, Mar 27, 2019.

  1. Toomuchh

    Toomuchh Fapstronaut

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    Prob should take a break from smoking so much weed and do other stuff. Sounds like your personality when youre high is mixing into your sober thoughts and fucking with your mind.

    I had this happen too when i smoked like everyday for years. Stopped smoking and it got better
     
    horny nerd likes this.
  2. Felipe.dasilva

    Felipe.dasilva Fapstronaut

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    Hey buddy. Good job on making a journal. Proud of you bro for making it this far.
     
    horny nerd likes this.
  3. horny nerd

    horny nerd Fapstronaut

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    Your right, but I also meditate and go to the gym and do lots of self improvement stuff. I can't use substances as tools? I believe god left us these tools that we could use to help improve our lives. Anyway I feel good right now and I think the feeling hopeless and anxious and depressed was just a flatline. I now realize that while my friends aren't as close as I want them they are still better than nothing and they aren't so bad.
     
  4. horny nerd

    horny nerd Fapstronaut

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    Yeah. I wrote this the day after a bunch of edibles. The next days I feel very creative and anxious or happy depends on how I felt the day I took them.
     
  5. horny nerd

    horny nerd Fapstronaut

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    Yes that is my actual age. I felt real anxious and hopeless and depressed writing this post. I think it was a big flatline. Because now I feel better than I ever have before. I'm just randomly smiling all the time. I'm on day 63. Do you know if edging has anything to do with flatlines? I edged sometime around 20 days ago and let out a bunch of precum when I pissed. I think that caused this big flatline which was so long I didn't even realize it was a flatline. I also haven't had a wet dream since around day 21 and before that I had wet dreams two days in a row once and had one every 6 or 7 days. Maybe that had something to do with it. Also me using a lot of weed made me really think a lot and while I feel I now know more about myself and life and am more content it made me feel a bit hopeless and anxious a couple days.

    Also maybe I ended the flatline by listening to a lot of mac miller.
     
    Subzero-32 likes this.
  6. Subzero-32

    Subzero-32 Fapstronaut

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    Yeah edging is bad and depressing,from my own experience it's much worse than fapping
    I'm really glad to hear that you're doing good
     
  7. Angus McGyver

    Angus McGyver Fapstronaut

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    Remember that the key to self-mastery, self-control and spiritual awareness is to free yourself from any external tools and not let these have any control over you. What drugs do to you is the opposite; they cloud and numb your senses and block the powerful force that is within you (residing in your subconscious/infinite mind). If you haven't practiced any self-mastery and instead take drugs in order to numb yourself and feel good, you will feel even more depressed as they later fade away from your system.
    Hence, you have to rely on the development of your inner force (and power of your thoughts) in order to reach that calm, tranquil and high-vibration state. This takes a lot of practice, time, and effort with many pitfalls on the way but it will be so worth it in the long run. As you get better at self-mastery and control, you will slowly start building up a genuine and authentic happiness from within.
    Happiness is nothing but a mental state or mindset that is independent from your circumstances and material and physical situation at the moment.
     
    CH3RRY likes this.
  8. You sound exactly like me except the fact that i am a total loner now. I lost my friends. I felt the same exact thing you do. Now I smoke pot and forget about it. But you're right... It does seem to be boring when you got no friends. No one close to really talk to. I got no buddy man. It really sucks. I lose interests in everything because I feel like communication and hanging out is what matters. Life goes on and on and all this conventionalized synthetic technology is really just losing nature. It's not right. We need to get out more guys! We need to get off these damn computers even though I'm on it now.... To be honest we need a revolution. Do you remember being a kid and having friends, playing out in the weather and just having a good time? Well, there you go! Now most just sit and play video games, get depressed, idk I mean I do it! I admit it.... Happiness is slowly dying I feel like. Society has gotten into a bit of darkness, wouldn't you say?

    I mean I'm 24 and I feel like a 14 year old stuck in a 24 year old body. My development is totally screwed up. I explored various spiritual paths and religion. Eventually I got to the point where I am right now and said: I've become numb in a way to how I should truly express myself as a human being. We need people. We can't keep isolating. I know what happens when you decide to do it.

    Being empty isn't fun. So yeah.... I just play games sometimes, eat, skateboard outside if nice, go to the library, come on here, you know that stuff.... Except I only talk to family. I don't have friends nor anyone I really talk to besides on here I guess. I'm telling you.... I just yeah... I smoke my bowl today like 2 or 3 times. Just take a hit every few hours and load it up. idk... It calms me down so I don't have to get angry with anyone. I'm not a party person, I'm not like others. I like to be moral but not in a religious sense if that makes sense. Anyhow sorry for dragging this out... Truth is man I feel the same way bro!
     
    horny nerd likes this.
  9. Angus McGyver

    Angus McGyver Fapstronaut

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    Have you thought about joining a local community or organization of some kind where you can meet people with similar interests and points of view?
    Just a thing as volunteering with others for some local charity, church, or other kind of community could probably help you get in touch with some great people plus you are doing something for others and not only for yourself. One of the most fulfilling, great and purposeful things in life is to do something for others and see how you are affecting them in a positive way.
    The good thing about many of these communities is that they usually consist of people who are spiritually aware, conscious and enjoy the little things in life which is the total opposite to the population as a whole.
     
  10. I'm not much of an organization type of person. Been through most of that in my past.
     
  11. Minsc

    Minsc Fapstronaut

    I wonder, if a piece of what you left behind in the past is what you're missing now? Basically getting together with other people is organizing with others.
     
  12. horny nerd

    horny nerd Fapstronaut

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    Is your account really deleted? You sound a lot like me. If your account is actually not deleted we can talk.
     

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