How do I lower my standards?

Feels like I’m coming to grips that I’m like a 5-6 to others in the dating realm. But it’s seems like I’m always attracted to the very beautiful young ladies but can’t stomach the fact that I may have to settle. How do I get around this?
Thanks

 

For the love of God don't settle physically for someone. Or at least tell her if you think you are. No woman in the world wants to find out after she got married or gave birth that she was "settled" for and what her partner actually wanted was a billion other women who look nothing like her.

Think about how you would feel if the person you're with struggled to stomach "settling" for you while actually longing for other beautiful men.

 

Me on the other hand I find myself longing for a woman whose looks are nothing to brag about. and Uses her values and care to compensate for her lack of beauty. From my honest opinion hotter/sexier seem worth it at first glance, but they have unbearable personalities in the long run.

But what do I know? I'm single mostly because of my decision to opt out of the dating game and hopefully find a woman who is willing to engage in actual courtship.

 

Not body shaming skinny chicks when I say this, but....

Big girls are a lot of fun. Dont get some boring skinny chick. Maybe a nice latino lady with those curvy hips. The can rock your world.

Just saying that you might miss out on something awesome if you put physical parameters in place.

You want someone who is fun, sweet, and friendly. They come in all shapes and sizes and flavors.

You dont want some stuck up prissy bitch. If you get that I hope you like her because your friends wont and they will go ehh, see ya. Then your stuck with her all by yourself unless she leaves you and takes half your stuff.

A story told 1000 times.

Going solely on looks is bad news. If she is not and down to earth. Thats pure gold.

 

I wouldn't mind a heavier woman if I am being completely honest, as a matter of fact I always found myself having a soft spot for them. But I am also afraid that it is a bit of a fetish for me as well, as I have always gotten a boner by simply looking at a bigger woman. And may also be too much of a hard guy to get to know, but at the same time, if a big girl really got to know me and was able to crack me open I'd be more than happy if she wanted to be my wife.

 

Started to do this. It helps a lot.

 

I think years of porn usage has gave me “goggles” in how I see women. Like they have this kind unattainable standard to live up to and I now feel bad for putting them through that.

 

Hello friend. I'm a bit new to this forum, but maybe I can provide some thoughts:

First of all, there's nothing wrong with finding attractive women attractive. The clue is in the word afterall; if you weren't drawn to them, then they wouldn't be attractive, right?

Anyways, we're all human beings. We're hardwired to find beautiful women attractive, because our brains associate attractiveness with good health and fertility. What we find attractive (in terms of our anatomical face and body structure) is programmed by nature; we have no control over who or what we're attractive to. However, there's a painful truth you should probably consider, that might make you feel a bit better:

I can say this from personal observation: A lot of women want to be with a guy more attractive than themselves, even if they aren't too good looking at all. For instance, I've heard of men who prefer chubby women, while being in the best shape themselves (they probably got advice from this forum, LOL). I've also seen women who are rather short dating guys WAY Taller than themselves (you almost never see the opposite). What can I say? Human nature is a one-way straight; men are expected to "date down", while women "date up" all the time.

Let me try and help you feel better. You said you're attracted to these beautiful girls, but you never approached them. That means you're pragmatic; you understood that they were out of your league, and you were disciplined enough to refrain from talking to them.

Just remember though: Just because she's less attractive (or even on your looks level) doesn't mean that she'll be eager to go out with you, either. Trust me, in a world where body positivity is a thing, some women sadly see themselves are more attractive than they actually are, and social media only inflates this feeling. They might actually get annoyed if you approach. On the bright side, NoFap encourages exercise and fitness, so maybe a girl might notice you that you might feel some attraction to. The key word being maybe.

I hope what I said helps.

 

I can't speak for everyone, but where I live, women "punch above their weight" all the time in the partners they choose. That phrase seems to only apply to men. I mean, how often do you see a women dating a guy shorter than her, compared to the reverse? Where I live, the former almost NEVER happens.

Still, it's good that you've seen some success. Just curious, could you define what you mean by "average"?