Hello to all Just a brief introduction as good to participate rather than just observe. Joined today. I am 49yr married and 3 kids from London Probably like many here my porn addiction started as a bit of fantasy and slowly became habitual and addictive. Mine as a result of other sexual and love addiction issues. Tried some group work face to face and helpful but need something ongoing and immediate and online and NoFap seems just right. I will go for PM as not sure I would want PMO but let's see how the journey goes. Love and Regards to all..
Welcome here!. This place is a good tool to keep our mind focused and since we can enter anytime (right now I am at work, writing instead of watching porn, what could easily could have happened) All the best!
Thanks Jomo Nice to get a welcome. Porn or some off shoot of romance or sex always there back of my mind, as they say is the case in most men. I also firmly believe we are all the same underneath with the same emotions and behaviours given the circumstances. We rationalise all our behaviours. As you say reading NoFap is a good way of diluting cravings and keeping on track. Kindest...
Yes, most of us always have some degree of sexual thoughts back in our minds. I am afraid that's the way it is, however, is in our will and determination to keep the "beast in the cage". Have a great evening in now cold London!
Still holding firm. To think a number of years ago no PM was easy. Not even a second thought. Now it is a real battle. Was feeling a bit crazy yesterday so read 3 panic button messages and went for a shower and it passed. Another day and another challenge.. The way it will be I suspect for a while.
Hey @Connected freedom , I'm just a normal ordinary member. No moderator super powers and no special insite. I share my ESH (Experience, Strength and Hope) of what works for me. Just another warm welcome and a heart felt hello. This community has helped me so much. What worked for me was "working" it. It took hard work for me to complete a hard reboot (No pmo) for 120 days, then move into a Sex Positive mode. First, reading the literature published by NoFap itself along with reading journals. Then, doing the work. Writing in my journal and replying to introductions and other's journals. Finally, but not least, getting involved with the fellowship. I found it on the forums, but also in people's profiles. The forums tend to be longer posts, where the profiles tend to be more "conversational". That is what has worked for me. I like to remind myself that this community was here waiting for me with the lights on when I arrived. Now, I have to do my best to be there when someone comes to the community. Then, watch this video: --> L PS - One of the ways I got involved with the fellowship was by reading some really great journals. Reading other's stories with their victories and even defeats is a big part of my program. I've included journals from all age groups, spiritual members, religious members, secular members, male and female. You should find journals that help. If not, look around, there are hundreds of others from which to choose. When I say "it works if you work it", reading journals is part of that work. Once you open a journal, click "Watch Thread" in the upper right of the page to get alerts when new posts are made. Here are just a few: @Iron Patience - https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.php?threads/155794/ --- @ludwig525 - https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.php?threads/155658/ --- @PatrickR - https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.php?threads/139570/ --- @GeeWhizz - https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.php?threads/152127/ --- @Sunshadow - https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.php?threads/75108/
Hello!. Congrats for your victory... each day it passes and you keep standing is a real an complete goal. Just think how easy would have been to let yourself go and how you hate yourself just a few minutes after having relapsed. I share your pride for this apparently small one, but a great achievement in the path to control this addiction.
Hi guys Thanks for the ongoing support. I will be checking out the resources you mention StopTheMusic I actually look forward to checking the NoFap site. Feels a real positive and well structured resource to go to especially when feeling vulnerable but also when feeling strong and balanced. Might try the academy. Anyone used the academy as well as the free site can give some direction on that? Have the feeling to act out multiple times a day and night, but have resisted PM. A spare 5mins is enough to create the urge. But I have not wanted to stop the option of orgasm which would mean either with my wife or a call girl but as the wife will not allow sex until I can confirm I will not act out again, my option of call girl feels like a safety net. But what is actually happening is I don't want to use that safety net which makes me feel proud and strong. I know I could see a call girl anytime as it is so easy these days and no one would know but me and I would actually enjoy it but I know it would lead nowhere emotionally and take away my personal power and drives, and just keep me in this cul-de-sac and destructive habit. Done that seen that. It all starts from PM though. In time hopefully soon I can remove this safety net and commit to PM + orgasm with wife. So I am actually PMO at present but PM remains the goal. Now I have read a little more on the NoFap system I will start a journal and start updating in there. Keep Strong all members. The battle is demanding but it most definitely worth it. Kindest ...
Hey @Connected freedom , Please, please believe me when I say this: "Thank you for being here". This fellowship needs people who participate and work the program. So, you are seriously the most important person here while you are posting, answering questions, adding to your journal, reading posts, reading a replying on journals. Imagine this website with nobody talking, nobody answering and no one writing on their journals or profiles. It would be a ghost town and wold offer no help. So, please keep coming back and participating. I, for one, want to hear when things are going well. But, also, when things are going poorly. --> L
Well guys. Thanks for the support Daily update. Struggle today. Just feel I need a release. Not like a big explosion or something or a long session but just a 5 minute and its done.. Nagging desire that keeps coming up.. You know what I mean... But I don't want to reset and I want to get to my 30 days and then go on from there. Anyway holding strong and trusting it will ease over the next few days. One trick I am playing is I will have an orgasm with a lady tomorrow or day after so just hold on, but when the tomorrow coms I will say another few days, and so on.. Peace.. ps. Just realised I should have posted this post in my daily journal page and not the new to fap forum. Will use the journal from now on for daily updates..
Hello. You are 100% right. Wife should be the release mean for every married man. If you have the chance for that is great. In my case things are North Pole cold, and sleeping with a woman makes my blood boil, but I will stick to my goal and will try to fix things with my wife..a long way to go on this, I am afraid.
Jomo All we can do here is be the best we can and be kind, honest and purposeful to our SO. I don't know your story and maybe you can post a link to your journal and share but you are still together and that suggests purpose and destiny. I would want to make my life a masterpiece and not feel shackled by circumstance which is why I am here. My SO offered a marriage of convenience but I firmly rejected that. All or Nothing which meant change and real passion and trust must return.
