Watch the "hot crazy matrix" on YouTube. Those unicorns do exist out there somewhere. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hKWmFWRVLlU
If that's your litmus test, you'll find roughly equal numbers of both at church vs. at clubs and bars! ... IMO YMMV Being open sexually is not the same as being dishonest. Some folks who are into non-committed sex absolutely abhor lies, hidden motives, sneakiness and mooching. Sometimes the girl with the tattoos and piercings will be a truer friend to you than a girl who appears clean and perfect, and talks the talk about purity. At least that's what I've noticed. But then, I don't see much moral difference between using casual sex to string along an unsuspecting sugar boyfriend, and using false dreams to trap a guy into marriage, only to turn on him (in private!) once the ink is dry on the contract. They're both bad ways to hurt people. I think the only protection is to take your time getting to know a girl before you put your heart on the line, and keep your eyes wide open before you do anything irreversible (be it marriage, large gifts, or unprotected sex).
Non-committal sex plays by an entirely different set of rules. In that quote I was using a committed relationship as the rule. The "hit it and quit it" is a seperate catagory all together. Not a bad one, and in some cases even more intelligent if you know a relationship would be a facade with where you are in life. If a girl is honest about the fact that thats what it is, that IS honesty. I was speaking more of the girl who hides under the opposite guise with ulterior motives. None of my statements were based on appearance in any regards. Looking like she would be a bad girl or looking like the apple pie baking suburban housewife isnt a tell tale sign by any means. I have seen some very scandalous apple pie mom's throughout time as well. However, your last statement regarding putting the time in is absolute gospel. Its about knowing them well enough with eyes wide open. I do also take into consideration that people change. I'm going through a pretty shitty divorce so I am going to play devils advocate on this thread a bit, but I truly do understand where you are coming from.
"Respectable set of morals" is quite vague. And what is respectable to you might be entirely different than what is respectable to her. I think you need to further define what you are looking for before you can know where to find persons who meet your criteria. In a previous relationship, both of us thought we had high moral values, but it turned out what we thought that meant was very different. A person will take a lot of values from how they were raised. So you will normalize things that might be very strange to someone else, and vice versa.
i dont think any where is the right place to look for a girl, you can't generalize where to meet someone. i am not talking about bars and churches that sort of thing, just don't try to go to one kind a place with dating on your mind, i dont anyway.
