"Demotivational talk"

(I wrote this in one sitting during the night, if it inspires you can use tell other people just remember who it came from.)

Hello you, I know you. I have known you since the beginning. When you were born so was I. I am not your ego, I am not your self-esteem. I am you. Yes YOU. The truth is, and you know it. You and I spend every waking day and night together, so I know what feel and think. Even when others do not. The truth is this, you have never recently spent time with me alone because you are afraid of me, all those negative thoughts in your head are your thoughts, which you created and live by. You have never really been a lone together for a long because all you do is look to the outside word for your validation on what you should be. Who you should be. What you should wear, drink and think.

Every day you ask your friends, your girlfriends, and random strangers. Do I look good in this, I wish I was xyz. All because you want external validation on your self-worth. Simply because you do not want to look in the mirror and look back see the person steering back at you.
You hate yourself inside, because you believe the word should have made you this way, some special way. You simple do not understand, you simple do not believe and you simple would not try it. Rather you will complain about it, and find the easiest way to get out of doing it. Simply because you are afraid. Look in the fucking mirror and tell me the fucking truth.
What do you fear? What can you not let go off? You do not even know do you. The fear is fear of your self-worth, that tiny little piece of shit validation you hold onto so badly. Your job title, your career title, you ideological believes, your social construction believes. Hell you do not even know what social construction is. Do you?

Simply because it is easier to find the easiest way out in life to your problems, because you would never listen to me. You have not listen to me for a long fucking time. So get ANGRY. VERY ANGRY. Look in the mirror and say what you fucking feel like. That is why say. GO ON AND SAY IT. YOU FEEL LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT. You feel like a loser, because you do not have certain things, you are not certain things. Let me tell you the truth. When you knew who you were, before life got fucked up. You did not give a shit, you were you and the world admired and love you for it. YOU did not have these limiting believes, hell you did believe anything was not impossible. YOU believed in you.

So how come you do not believe in you now, because it is too easy to make excuses. It is too easy to sit at home and watch tv, instead of spending 10 minutes a day doing the exercise you need to do become a healthy person. Because it is easier to say to yourself, being healthy and buying healthy food is expensive. You have an excuse for everything. You would rather get your validation from the outside world, your friends, your family, your work colleges. But the truth is this, they DO NOT GIVE A SHIT ABOUT YOU, MORE THAN YOU DO. You heard me correctly, THEY DO NOT GIVE A SHIT ABOUT YOU. They are empty shells just like you and know it.

Simply because if you become better than them, you fear they would leave you. So what, you never really had any friends to begin with. YOU MADE FRIENDS. You did not have to ask, people wanted to be around you because you were amazing and still are.

So, so, so, WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU AFRIAD OF. NOTHING. BULLSHIT. EVEYTHING. You are too afraid to ask that person out, to even say hello to that person, to even try and speak to that man or woman. Because of bullshit notion of “do not talk to strangers”. BULLSHIT, BULLSHIT WORLD FOR BULLSHIT RULES. So be honest, you would rather be happy that your friends comfort you that you stand on your own, with yourself. You would rather be happy, by yourself as you that image what you can be. BECAUSE I AM YOU. YOU KNOW WHAT YOU CAN BE.

You would rather not even try because of all the fears, the fear of the unknown. Holding you back. I am not pretty enough so they do not like me, who said that, me or you. You did, not me. I know I am attractive, and so do you. So let go, let go off all the crap that believe to be truth. And fucking do it…you do not have time to wonder what. Simply because the biggest BULLSHIT, you know to be true is this. It is my fucking life and my fucking rules, so lets push the comfort zone because it is not comfortable any more.

LETS DO IT. JUST DO IT. START today and continue forever. All I ask you is not to attach yourself to the outcome of anything. To rather enjoy the process, day in day out. Even when it hurts, remember it is the process of you being the BEST FUCK YOU. You are no longer the person you imagined rather the person you are living it.

So you want girlfriend? Talk to the woman. Say hello. But I am shy. BULLSHIT. Tell me when did learn what the word shy meant. What the fuck where you before you learnt the word shy? YOU were you. You did not care.
You want a boyfriend, fuck it let go. Go and say hello. No of course you would, because of societies rules. Or better yet I’ll get my friend to do it. Yes because what you are really saying is, within my mind. I have no foundation of me. I cannot hear, me. I do not remember who me is.

Deep down you know, you know. You know, if I quit everything. What do I have left? NOTHING.
NOTHING. Just like I started with but worked on. I must work on me first. I am me. I must be the best me. That means letting go off everything. Letting go, of makeup… Simply because you feel pretty with it on. YOU ARE PRETTY regardless. Who told you “what beauty is?”, who let you allowed to define “what success is?”. Come on tell me. Was it you or me? It was you. Not me. Because if that was me. I WOULD NOT GIVE A FUCK, I WOULD NOT BULLSHIT YOU LIKE THIS.

You want to get better, why bother, you never listen to be me because I am not the followers on your Twitter, Facebook, Myspace, etc. I am not your friends in their physical body. But you know who I am. I am you and will be until the day you day. So you keep ignoring me and keep being unhappy the way you are. Or you can be the way you were meant too, the way YOU REALLY WANT TO BE. Fuck it let go.

Just do it. LISTEN CLOSELY. What I am asking is not easy, but it is worth it. All I ask of you, is simply focus. Simply go to the library and get the knowledge and they put that knowledge into action. That is all. You want to get better at anything focus and do it.

Quit all the bad habits, all the shit excuses you use and FUCKING LET GO. Let go.
Look in the mirror and say it. Do I like who I am now? No. When then start, begin just begin and continue every day, even for 10 minutes a day. Just do it. Want to be healthier, change the food you and then exercise. Want that career, fucking let go of your job (Just above broke) and chase the career. Want that boyfriend / girlfriend? Approach the person and say “Hello I am…How are you”. NO FUCKING EXCUSES!!!!! You know it is true, but you believe the bullshit. YOU keep telling yourself. I am afraid of….”Rejection, of getting hurt,”.

Ask me the truth, not your fucking friends. ME, if you can remember me. WHAT IS THE TRUTH? There is not rejection, no pain, no hurt, nothing. Rather there is. That is it. There is just feedback at the most. It is not a destination, which you just wake up in then arrive. It is the love of the process.

The saddest thing is this, everything I have told you would not do it. You would not do it, you would make an excuse, simply because spend so much time working on xyz. Working on your body, working on your career, working on your money etc. Never working on me. Do you know who I am now? Do you remember who I am now? No? Who are you?

I am you, I am your mind. We have achieved more things together than apart, before the weeds started growing in here. We did amazing things, we had friends only we could believe. We stretch ourselves every day week and we did not make excuses. We had no held believes on what, it meant to be success, what it meant to be pretty, when enjoyed, what we looked like and how we thought.
So close your eyes again and imagine looking into a mirror and picture it. Me picture, what I look like. That is why, say it and believe it and feel it. I am the confident person, I am the successful person. I am the determined person. When I spend 10 minutes a day working on who I want to be, because I know who I am. I achieve what I want. So it is okay, to let go. Let us begin. Today not tomorrow. Every day I am becoming a better person. Let us push through the pain, and keep going. Let us get the feedback to improve. Let us take the risk. Let us finally say hello to me, then woman or man we have been too afraid of. Simply because in truth, I am only afraid of how amazing I am going too be.