[Day120]. Two Women.

Discussion in 'Success Stories' started by whatrichme, Jul 5, 2018.

  1. whatrichme

    whatrichme Fapstronaut

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    The inspiration I got from this post:
    https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.php?threads/10-years-of-not-losing-sexual-energy-during-intercourse-nor-masturbation-using-gnostic-techniques.109927/

    So I decided to go for a hike on a weekday. Beautiful day, and there I met a random physique woman in pink sporty clothing. She was taking selfie in nature and we exchanged some eye contact. That was intense and I knew something was happening, but I didn't bother to stop and walked pass her without much thought.


    Random Yoga Teacher (Yesterday)
    I stopped by the lakeside. She came by shortly and started doing selfie in yoga poses (magically, or intentionally within my sight). She peeked my way and well aware of my presence. Frankly, I like her, so I gathered my guts to walk over. She gave me that "He is walking over, OMG what to do now" look. Just a few lines, "Oh you do yoga?" "Show me the pics you have got" "What makes you here on a weekday?" then we decided to do more hiking together. There we enjoyed two hours of hiking, chatting, joking, a lot of sweating. Shy at first, she told me herself being an introvert don't really chat with strangers, but I asked her everything about her life, got her contact with enough clues to setup multiple dates. Only thing being she is young (at the same age as me, 30 btw), married with a kid! The connection between us was true though. I have no interest in tearing apart a family, but the ability to chat up some random ladies I have a thing with never happened in my life. Given I never pulled any successful cold approach. And man, that was smooth. Makes me wonder, yeah I can have a lot of female friends too, not just little. Definitely something I enjoyed and would like to do more.


    My Ex (Today)
    We never properly broke up, but we didn't contact each other for a very long while. I lost control of the relationship (her) and it ended in complete chaos. We had absolutely no interest in each other anymore. That's why I initiated my no PMO journey at the first place.
    Fast forward to today, she asked me out to meet and to properly thank me for everything I did in the past. I can't recall any one instance where I enjoyed eating with her, but today we had the deepest conversation we had in the past two years. I tested her a little, in the past she would refuse to do everything I asked her to do, like holding an object for 2 seconds, getting me a cup of water, but today she was cool and very cooperative in making it a great time for us. She became another person, not edgy anymore, said yes to everything I have said, with deep respect towards me. In the past she really hated my facial hair and refused to kiss, today she said they are actually quite good (thanks to no PMO, great change there). And something she never did before, I got a message from her right after she got home, with this "I really miss you.." "When can we meet again..?" How weird it feels, as we aren't really together anymore, but you now flirt with me like never before?



    My Thoughts
    Maybe I want to focus on no PMO, maybe I want more female friends than sex, maybe I care about self-improvement more than who flirts with me. Maybe there will be more options pop up before I need to decide anything. Maybe I can hit 180 days before making any decision about my love life.

    I don't know. Let life decide where it takes me to.
    Thanks for watching, sorry for my English.




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    Last edited: Jul 5, 2018
  2. ImASinnerWhoJesusSaved

    ImASinnerWhoJesusSaved Fapstronaut

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    Good on you for staying clean with the first lady. It sounds like people are noticing that "change" but as Uncle Ben says, "With great power comes great responsibility." Exercising that responsibility wisely is the next step in maturing and you've done well.
     
  3. STAR DUST

    STAR DUST Fapstronaut

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    That is Avery smart healthy way to look at it. Many female friends will be healthy.
     
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  4. whatrichme

    whatrichme Fapstronaut

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    i guess it put us back into the driver seat where we can steer our relationships. Still have to act mature and be responsible though.

    A Cute Sales Girl
    Did one more experiment today. I was in a mall looking for hair styling products and I landed in a relevant boutique store.
    The only sales girl was having her lunch, but quick to stand and walked over to greet me.
    Oh cute girl, wavy feminine hair, lovely eyes.
    "Go have your lunch, we will chat in a bit!" Her eyes shined after my words, perhaps not many customers are as considerate!
    She decided to stay and walked me thru the store, meanwhile we had a fun and personal conversation (great interaction too I played with her hands and hair).
    And oops she's taken too, but I wasn't thrown off and the conversation didn't die. We chatted till I decided to move on to do more shopping.

    There's an entire school of thought saying girls in a relationship are "easier", or attraction can be assumed if a girl is engaged in a conversation with you anyway.
    But if I insisted in setting up a date or testing her boundaries, it could have ended in a blunt rejection. Not sure how I can handle it when I am still exploring and on my way of healing. Why risk it?
    So nope I didn't befriend her, didn't bother to get her contact either. Great experience though.:D


    Before no PMO if I asked any girl "Are you single?" I would have been perceived as creepy. Now with my voice, confidence, tone, eye contact and my beard, it's just a natural question to ask. And recently all girls that have been asked happily (and truthfully) answered me. Maybe I can ask more before I complain "Where are the single ones!!":p




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    Last edited: Jul 6, 2018
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  5. AddictMaster

    AddictMaster Fapstronaut

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    Well done for not pursuing the married woman. I hope to achieve that level of morality along this nofap journey. Inspiring story!
     
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  6. STAR DUST

    STAR DUST Fapstronaut

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    Way to go!
     
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  7. STAR DUST

    STAR DUST Fapstronaut

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    Yeah and karma’s real if you plan to get married.
     
  8. whatrichme

    whatrichme Fapstronaut

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    I am planning to let it cool off for a week or two, cause I don't want to cross that boundary. But if we end up being hiking/yoga buddies, I will be more than happy since I never had one!


    That brings an interesting topic. I have a real experience where I had two concurrent relationships, things turned bad, I became single, and the next few girls that came along were all taken looking for flings. Though I explored but I refused all of them, without much regrets today.
    I tend to believe in Karma for relationships and money. But that's probably off topic.
     

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