Hey. I'm on day 14 of nofap and the reason i started is because of porn induced fetishes (rly hope they are) and i also just want to be in control of my life. So i started watching porn at an early age (13,14) just normal hetero porn at first but it quickly after just a year or so developed into transwoman and even gay porn after that. It always ended with feelings of guilt and regret. Well i stopped watching gay porn when i was like 16 and watched more and more transwoman porn instead and also "sissy hypno". I got wierd fantasies about being a girl and even dressed up sometimes... but every time i released myself watching that stuff i felt regret/guilty and i was like "i'm never watching this again". But i always went back for more. I continued to jerk off mainly to transwoman porn throughout my teenage years, and maybe every 3-4 month or so i had periods where i watched "sissy hyno". What makes me scared is that the "sissy hypno" and crossdress fantasies that comes with it makes me incredible turned on, it's almost scary. So it makes me question my sexuality and who i'am. But the feeling of guilt and regret after i jerked off to it gotta be a sign of it being porn induced right? Well the reason why im making this thread is because these crossdressing/sissy hypno urges are increasing since i started nofap. I get uncomfortably turned on thinking about it (somtimes it just pops up in my brain), and i just want it to go away. Have anyone been the through the same shit?
You're having withdrawal issues. The first days of NoFap are extremely tough to get through because your brain is so conditioned now to a) have these thoughts in your head, and b) PMO to these thoughts for relief. The thoughts may pop into your head as you said, and that's going to happen at first. Don't sweat it. But you mustn't start fantasizing when it happens and you mustn't think of these things on your own. That keeps the pathways present. This is the hard part. You need to do whatever it takes to not think about it. Find something else to occupy your mind. A hobby or goal. And trust me, the thoughts and desires eventually fade. Just stick with it. Good luck!
Yeah I agree mate and had the exact same journey (like most people who get into the sissy fetish). I don't know who created Sissy Hypnos but they are definitely evil and have a strange power to corrupt and confuse heterosexual men (which is their intention). When you stop them it is like coming off of a very addictive drug but after a few weeks and months it fades. I now look at them after a few months break and honestly they seem really stupid. I almost laughed at myself for letting them have any effect on it. If you look at threads on this forum you'll see that you're not alone. You'll also see that most guys who ever acted on the hypno urges in real life quickly realised it was all bullshit and that they're not gay or bisexual. If you don't get turned on by men without any influence from porn but feel attracted to women in real life then you're straight. It'll be ok, time will heal you. Like any recovering addict it is a process and even if you relapse just get back on the horse and eventually you'll be free of it.
Some of the first of the hypno genre was done by what were called 'Hypno Dommes' who sold audio files. This had evolved from the roots of your basic phone domination, so eventually a link was made where guys asked women to use hypnosis to make them feel inferior, or feminine in this case. From there came the genre of sissy hypno videos: the mashing of porn clips with some of these audio files and also binaural tones to induce a trance. I've seen some of these people who make these videos in fetish forums and they are trying to be sissies themselves. Then there are the porn companies who saw dollar signs with a customer base and now everyone's in the game. My theory is that since a lot of us are confused about why we like the sissy genre so much (and even grossed out in some cases), we needed something to push us, or "hypnotize" us into feeling ok with our sissy side. So some of the guys among us have requested this so many times that they have taken it upon themselves to develop these videos. I don't really believe that most people who make these videos have any true malice in mind when they do it. Rather, they have no clue as to the poison they're spreading, and think they're just providing a service for a growing demand.
Yes. I have been thru them and they are like crack to me. Go read my threads and if I can be of any help pls connect.
Thats exactly the same way I feel about it it is like crack. But today i will not masturbate fuck this retardet shit.
So, I have a bit of time to respond more fully. Yes, quite a few people here are dealing with what you're dealing with. But understand this: Sissy Porn and definitely Sissy Hypno have a very subversive effect on a vulnerable brain. Why do I know this? Because I was a young teen boy caught up in the VORTEX of ladyboy/transgendered person/trap porn and then wildly absorbed, captured, bound, and held captive by the mental images of sissy hypno. I was young, tiny, and unsure of any male attributes residing in me, and at the most vulnerable time in my young life, I felt I had discovered the TRUTH, the SECRET ELIXER to life, the be all and end all to take away my loneliness and isolation. Why be a tiny, frail, skinny unmasculine unpopular boy all alone? Why not be a sissy? Which led quickly to "Why not be a girl?" Which led even more quickly to "Take hormones, change my body." Perhaps I was predisposed to this --- I am now fully a transwoman (I still have a non-working thingie). Here I sit, at age 22, as a full woman. I am not sure it was the right thing to do BUT I know this: sissy-porn made me curious, sissy hypno validated that it was "ok" to carry out these fantasies in real life. And THAT, that is where the addiction overthrew all natural progression into manhood for me. I abandoned that path, and from age 14/15 onwards devoted my life and being to becoming a woman. These are not just harmless fantasies you're playing with. Be very careful because the path can get to be clear --- so clear that u stop asking any questions at all. I started (illegally) at 14 to do hormones and testosterone blockers so I could not never ever EVER develop man traits. I didn't. So a very young and confused person made a decision for me that I am now re-thinking, many years later. Think about what you are playing with. Maybe most people wouldn't go down the path I went down --- but if you're vulnerable, and confused, and need reinforcement --- you are a candidate for taking my path. So I sit now, and am really asking myself the deepest (and scariest) questions of my life. Do you want that too? Go read my threads: My Intro on "NoFap": https://www.NoFap.com/forum/index.p...acked-my-life-is-it-too-late-to-return.92403/ My Journal on "NoFap": https://www.NoFap.com/forum/index.p...a-transwoman-seeking-peace-and-clarity.92623/ I wish you peace. If you want to discuss any of this, I am available (I am also more confused than almost anyone here,LOL, so maybe we can just chat if needed. I have way more questions than answers as I, too, am only just starting here on NoFap. Jamie xoxox
That's a crazy story Jamie , and i will read your thread. That's crazy if the sissy hypno influenced your feelings towards your gender, that just shows how dangerous that stuff is for a receptible mind. I mean the sissy hypno is not something i was into all the time, when i was at my top confidence level/socializing alot/meeting a lot of girls, i had no urges to watch that stuff. But as soon as i had a more depressing period in my life, just sitting in my room alone watching porn, i was much more receptible to this kind of porn and i got of on degrading myself with the sissy hypno, because in the end that's what you do. And like you say Jamie, if you are are feeling inadequate, not manly, unsure of yourself, and you are isolated and maybe already porn addicted you are going to be very receptible to this kind of videos.
This isn't from a NoFap perspective, but I know a thing or two about gender identity working both as a youth worker and case manager and through my own personal hobby acting in community theatre. If the urge to dress up persists beyond your NoFap journey, community theatre is somewhere you can start exploring dressing up and putting on make-up safely. See, I worked with one young person who was Trans about 3 years ago. He (going she eventually, but identified as a he at the time) wanted to become a woman. He was absolutely hilarious with his sense of humor and often left everyone in stitches.... He came from oppressive beginnings and ended up constantly the center of attention, particularly when he dressed up... He seemed more powerful wearing a dress? In learning a little about the psychology behind transgender thinking, my understanding is that some people might Identify with the opposite gender being so much stronger than their own that they just HAVE to gravitate towards said opposite as much as possible. This is why it is not considered a sickness under mental health, because, when someone finds their identity, stress, anxiety and depression decrease. Now hold on, that doesn't mean you are heading in that direction. Firstly, can I assume that transwomen generally often hold a position of power within porn? Are they put on a pedestal? Do they have a great deal more confidence than a woman or a man? If they are powerful to you, then you probably consider them to be above you, on a pedestal in some way... This means that when you feel a boost in confidence, you may be reminded of them, like when you might associate wearing sunglasses with being cool right? Maybe you just don't feel like your new confidence is allowed unless you are more like the people you have seen in those videos? Are you allowing yourself to feel confident as you, or do you still feel like you need something to hide behind? A change in identity? A new set of clothes? A pair of sunglasses? A new tattoo? My overall advice... Give yourself a break. You are allowed to be confident as whoever it is you want to be.... If this doesn't appear to be going away after you pass the no PMO 90 day period, I suggest you get down to your local theatre and 'Sissy' yourself up! It's somewhere you can safely dress up in colourful costumes and make-up as a man or woman and be praised for it. It's a very empowering experience... You meet great supportive friends too. That's a start anyway...
I have no experience with hypno porn. Didn't even know it was a thing. Who the hell produces and publishes that sh*t? Isn't there anything to reverse this? Like hypnosis to be comfortable as a man? About fetish thoughts: I guess I can say I am a veteran nofapper and recovering porn addict. Even I sometimes get surprised by old fetish thoughts and it is vital that I block these. A lot of people in this thread suggested you keep doing what you are doing and get comfy but I think you have to decide NOW what you are aiming for, for the rest of your life. Sissy fetishist or normal person? Every day counts. Everytime you go to bed you either used your day to get comfortable with your fetish or you normalized your sexuality. Interesting idea, but I advise OP against it. See, in theatre there are boys who have fun dressing up as girls and find it funny and artistic. The OP is a person who gets his dick up on that stuff. Sorry for the crude language. 90 days is nothing. He hypnotized himself since his teens. I watched "normal" porn and a bit of fetish porn and still suffer the emotional and physical consequences and it's almost a year of rebooting for me now. If he keeps the option open for any fetishized action he will constantly hope and long for it, keeping the fetish alive. This is why I advise OP to decide now. It's a long, rocky path and recovery can only be done if he commits himself 100%. Trans people have the highest suicide and HIV infection rate. Also keep in mind that you can't be a "cute looking sissy boy" all your life. That is some delusional fantasy you probably got during your hypno sessions. You are going to get old and you are not going to be remembered for something boring like what you did in bed.
You're not alone, @confused23. It's something that many struggle with but I think a lot of people don't talk about. I, myself, have been a lurker of forums like this just searching for terms like Spoiler: trigger "crossdress", transgender, and even "transwoman" (sorry to use that derogatory term) just to find other people's stories about this but I never really post. I think that for many people, if you are like myself, there is a fear that this may be something more and that you will not be better until someone tells you whether you are transgender or not. In the end, I think if we have these questions, we are definitely in the gender spectrum unlike "normal" people. In the end you're the only one who can really answer how far in the spectrum you are. If you're okay being a man and envision yourself as one comfortably - there is no reason to think that you will need to transition to feel better. You do, however, need to get over the fear that you may in fact have to take that plunge one day because many people say this is a part of you that you need to accept. You can accept that these thoughts will always be there and they will subside. But much of this anxiety deals with the fear of having to do something you don't want to do: upend your life. Only you can make that decision and it's a big one. Talking about it helps. Reading-up on literature helps. Seeing a counselor who doesn't propose extreme measures helps. If you're religious, praying helps. There are people that have stopped, but you never hear their story: https://healingcd.wordpress.com/2012/03/18/12-steps-to-stop-crossdressing/ If it's not your cup of tea, to each their own - but I do believe that you live with what you can handle. And if you can live your life with these thoughts coming-up every once-in-awhile and you push them away after realizing what it's trying to make you do - then you'll be fine. For me, it's still a struggle, but I take solace in knowing that I got to this point because i was looking for a high that I wasn't getting from porn. I'd be interested in hearing people's thoughts on this!
