Already said in a DM, but these are all very good. I can see the improvement over time from where you started.
Hello everyone! How are you all doing? Finally back lmao. I tried to be productive during my time away. I've started editing book 2 so I can send it to early readers. I also wrote a handful of haikus. Let me know what you think! The sound of the rain. Pitter-patter pitter-pat. Beneath grey, pure blue. Candyfloss saunters across a burning ocean turning dark and cold. Trees without their leaves spread their roots in ashen soil. Skeletal remains. As silver cascades from Heaven high above us, the thirsty plant smiles. Cold against my ear, frigid voices speak. They say, "Summer's done for sure."
Thanks! I've seen myself improve too and now I make sure everything's 5-7-5 and it's taught me a lot about word choice and flow. I love the first and third ones. I'm impressed with their imagery and it's inspiring me to try some new styles going forward. It's nice to see you back tho!
Up to 102 pages edited. Making good progress, with my goal being to send it off to early readers sometime next month.
I love this one too. I'm hoping to do more bird-themed ones this month and get an essence of the season.
I'm quite fond of bird ones myself. Little birds feeding Pohutukawa's nectar Cheerfully dancing Silver cloaked trees sway Most bare yet one blossoming Listen and be still Seasons are changing Leaves fall yet the tree still stands Changing yet secure The birds chirp and sing They are content with no house No worry or fear The ants work non stop Gathering with a purpose They will dwell with peace Go outside look up You hold the keys to your chains Fear is a liar Many types of grass Some tall some short some flower Wonderfully designed Do not fret or fear Set your mind on something pure Be at rest my soul
123 pages edited. Also wrote a haiku. Streaks of white on blue. Clouds painted across the sky. Divine artistry.
I wrote one starting with "seasons may change" but this one's far superior. I love all of your haikus! You're talented (we all are) but have you thought of organizing a poetry book?
And I'm serious. If you two ever wanted to make a book of haikus with me, I won't turn down the invitation.
We should! I'm all for it as I'm sure we'd create something beautiful. I'm all ears for talking about it.
A bit of a cheeky, jazz haiku for you guys: seasonal romances are delightful, delirious, or even de-lovely