Bad relapses...

Discussion in 'Porn Addiction' started by TrueSaiyan, Jun 25, 2019.

  1. TrueSaiyan

    TrueSaiyan Fapstronaut

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    Hey everyone I’m posting this in porn addiction, because I am having a bad relapse right now at the moment. My last streak went to 15 days and now I’m feeling like nothing is working. I don’t know if I felt better or worse during my streak. The first week was okay, but then emotions started to rise...I have depression and do take medicine.

    I’m just wondering on what to do or if I should just leave nofap for a while..
     
  2. Freddiefox

    Freddiefox Fapstronaut

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    You are having more days on streaks than days of PMO, that is a good thing. That beats every day in PMO.
    Never give up.
     
    Tiger uppercut! likes this.
  3. LeviWepple333

    LeviWepple333 New Fapstronaut

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    I was going strong for 10 or 12 days. I relapsed just today. I feel awful and I didn't even enjoy it afterwards. Any tips? Need serious help.
     
  4. Ronila

    Ronila Fapstronaut

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    Counting days and relapses is one of the worst things you can do to yourself when trying to stop. Maybe if you had to get naked and run across your entire city if you relapse - then maybe you could count the days you avoided massive humiliation and actually feel like you accomplished something.
    But aside from offering any meaningful reward, counting days works initially and then it looses any motivational value and here is why:
    Psychologically if you play a game for the first time and you reach some arbitrary score of 50 you feel some sense of accomplishment, because of novelty so it keeps you motivated to play again, you play again and get score of 60 and you feel accomplishment again - there is improvement, and your brain rewards you, to motivate you. So now you are playing this game for 157th time and you do not care about your score at all until you get close to your highest score, which by this point is 250.
    Keeping "score" works because it allows you to see progress and compare it to others, but if you keep same scoring system it will become ineffective at motivating you, who cares if you reached score of 100 if your highest score is 250. You may actually feel depressed you performed so poorly.
    Reality is that you are not really trying to count days, you are trying to exploit motivation boost from counting days, but rather quickly it gets old and you loose that benefit and actually begin to suffer depressive symptoms from not being able to perform.
    We give up games when they get boring and they get boring when we no longer feel motivation they used to produce, this is why games have levels that only go up and there are new items, new abilities, new levels all to make sure you get constantly changing motivational goals that are hard by you can accomplish . This is a science at this point and game developers employ it when making games.

    If I were to design some kind of tracker it would be counting days you accomplished your goals, and you would never loose them. If you did what you planned today - you get one point.
    With some additional complexity and treats for reaching goals you set, you can continuously motivate yourself and never loose sight of the progress you have made so far. if you stop reaching your goals, your score stops.
    Having 100 days where you avoided the activity this year is far more telling than having 0 days because you relapse yesterday.
    You can then track the ratio between total days to date and days you achieved your goal.
     
    TrueSaiyan and Danton_7 like this.
  5. Danton_7

    Danton_7 Fapstronaut

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    Thanks bro. Just what i wanted, i was fooled by this counting system, lost all my motivation and didn't feel any seriousness towards nofap lately. Now Iam gona try your idea of counter, iam positive that it will work thanks.
     
    miXhal likes this.
  6. ImpureHuman

    ImpureHuman Fapstronaut


    thanks for this..
     
  7. TrueSaiyan

    TrueSaiyan Fapstronaut

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    Appreciate it man greatly!. I'm trying again and not giving in..
     
  8. hollyman

    hollyman Fapstronaut

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    agredd with this guys....the MAIN PURPOSE of nofap is to be 100% free from porn....it means when u start this journey u must commit that u never see porn again....


    Make Days counter it just an ordinary counter not purpose
     
    miXhal likes this.

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