"....and hear the lamentation of the pornographers"

I'll start with an invitation: I'm here to give, not just take. Always happy to listen and support my fellow humans.

38 year-old combat vet. Have overcome PTSD, Severe Depression, ADHD, alcohol and drug addiction. Was straightedge for 10 years... dropped the label but I'm still clean. Was a dedicated bodybuilder for a looooong time. The point is, I'm no stranger to willpower.....

But this thing, man. This pornography thing. Ugghh. Even Crom himself would struggle.

32 years of consuming visual junk. Never had a problem with women until very recently. The addiction intensified dramatically with the onset of PTSD, as I became more and more isolated. Content became less and less vanilla. I'm at the point where I require humiliation or shame to be aroused. My guy has become an avoidant, apathetic turtle. I'm super uncool with all this, and now that I'm mentally healthy and powerful again, I want to become sexually healthy, as well.

So here we go. "Crush your enemies," right?

 

It's been a week-and-a-half now. Thus far, I've given my laptop away, cleansed all potential visual materials from my home, and installed K9 on my computer and phone.

Things were going well up through yesterday, but I think I may have hit some sort of withdrawal depression, as I'm sorta tanking. I don't feel a compulsion towards porn, I just feel like garbage :/