An ode to Joy

If you have a karma that has put you in a painful position, a kind of position that other "successful" people are not in (you know exactly what I mean), then you should not try to be like those people. You cannot use their methods. It will never work. You need to find your own way. And it seems that way is always a fundamentally lonely way.

People naturally desire happiness. The problem is that when you seem dysfunctional in comparison to others (that's the problem) it is impossible to be happy. I discovered that happiness can only be achieved by giving up all hope of being happy. Yep. Happiness is not something you can find under a rock or in a secret closet. And it is not something you can achieve by getting laid.

Find yourself a quiet spot and give up all hope of being happy. Warning: This is a direct path and can be dangerous for some, especially if you decide to live alone in a rural area. Please keep the telephone number of someone you can confide in at all times. If you don't have any friends then just take anyone's number down.

When you can live like this for a while you will traverse a range of intense emotions: boredom, shame, anger, self-hatred. But if you can continue, and live a simple life, alone, you will eventually strike a vein of gold. A small trace, but definitely gold. Then you will bounce back to the other emotions. However, if you continue you will eventually find a gold mine. You have found joy.

When you find joy you have matured a great deal. You will be able to look at other people with confidence. You will be able to look into the eyes of a woman, serenely. And she will like you.