Abstinence from dating apps to take this extra time for growth?

It is normal to feel lonely some times. We are social be-ings, not social do-ings.
I feel lonely to sometimes, aldo I have friends, family, my sons and lovely people around me, the loneliness kicks in from time to time.

The difference between some months ago and today is that I choose to not run from feelings. I can't fab them away anymore.
I learned that I need to accept any feeling I have and invite it to sit down and tell me what it has to say. Loneliness sometimes tell me it would be better to reach out to other people, sometimes it tells me to do that one thing I really like doing (a hoppy, not the wanking thin
Or sometimes it just tells me I feel lonely and that it needs to be heard. That's when I try to be extra kind to myself and have compassion with myself.
I also learned to NOT push these feelings away, and not to blame or shame myself for these feelings. It is a part of me and need to be heard and need to be accepted. Else I would deny a piece of myself.
Once I gave it the right attention, the feeling goes away and give room to other feelings like self-love, self-compassion. It's from these feelings I can start DO-ing something that gives me self-esteem.
It does not work the other way around for me.
First my feelings and emotion (the be-ing), than the do-ing from a feeling of self-worth.

So it is ok to feel lonely. feel it, understand it, love it and give it a warm place in your heart. It will help you grow from feeling lonely to being a solitude person who knows his own self-worth, because he understand his emotions.

thanks for your post !
made me think about my loneliness and made me feel less alone

 

I’ll be honest brother—I’m a Gen Xer so I’ve always done it old school. Talking to women in bars, at grocery stores, libraries etc. I think the problem with dating apps is they take out the organic nature and the chemistry of talking to people. Granted, they can serve as an immediate starting point by removing the awkward barrier of starting contact but the flip side is that instead of being rejected by one girl in a bar, you can get rejected by hundreds in an hour.

I think the apps are causing you some pain and discord. You should dump them. Concentrate on building that life, which means working on YOU rather than an US (sorry that sounds life-coachy cringe). Point is—you start working on making a better you and a happier you, that’s when someone comes along.