A Guide To Overcome Your Addiction To Porn and Lust

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by Junaidi83, Jul 7, 2016.

  1. Junaidi83

    Junaidi83 Fapstronaut

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    Overcome your lust and love yourself to the core

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    "Mastering Other is Strength, Mastering Yourself is True Power"
    -Lao Tzu

    This guide is from my own personal experience during my journey to finally put and end my craving of flesh. In the beginning i plan to post it on Buddhist dedicated forum, but since that site close its member registeration , i post this firstly on Total War Center, but due different TOS rule which i respect i decide then to wrote in NoFap forum, in hope this article may bring fellow brother and sister into "Enlighment state"

    LUST

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    I bet every guy who read this, do have some craving, lurking inside your heart and soul, that cant be fight by conventional method, and by the day gone by the stuff grow and corrupt your soul, slow but sure, especially every day of our life always get exposure by some degree of lust either watching commercial ads, playing game, even watching movie.

    Have you notice this sign on your life :
    - Feeling awkward around woman, especially the beauty one, not because you feel low self esteem but because you want to screw her for no reason at all
    - Always try google some nude image , lewd video, in the middle of something, just to divert your attention, your mind is actively seeking that stuff
    - Look on the mirror and realize that you hate your own reflection for no solid reason, its your own face after all, why you dont like it ?

    So even you have just one sign from above, conggrats your heart already been corrupt, and from now its just matter of time for you to slip into deeper.You can lie to me and everybody but you simply cant lie to your own heart. Remember there is never late to find enlighment state.

    PORN

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    As ancient as it look, porn has been on the world for long time, nude drawing, painting, sculpting, litorica, its has been part of human needs.

    Even on bible, you can found some of erotic story. So how should we see porn ? Is it bad or its is good ? Then answer will be neither bad or good, depending how you look and use it, its can help or bring destruction.

    Take wine for example, in little dose its can help increase your health, however in larger dose its will ruin your liver and send you to early grave. But not every wine worth to be drink, also not every type of porn should we watch, because what we see, is what we learn, example if you look on rape porn, so does its teach you how to rape someone.

    As minor we probably been taugh that porn is bad and forbidden for us to watch because we still underage and realy have lack understanding about what is right and what is wrong, however as adult nobody taugh us what kind of porn we should look, and what kind of fetish forbidden for us to see, we just walk into pandora box without know what we dealing, so does we trapped inside new world without know how to escape from it. Also being adult in body doesnt mean also adult in mind, there lots of adult that have child mind inside their soul.Its about our understanding what is right and what is wrong, when and where porn shall be used.


    Its our nature to feel attracted to each other body, a male may be so interested to look on female body so does female who also feel curious to look on male genital. If we not feel atracted to each other, we will never exist today because nobody procreate.

    Here some of the sign you mind is not adult yet :
    1. Going into different fetish which really break moral code or dont have any use for your life. for example lets say mother/sister/wife gangbang fetish, as incest it not already bad enough, now you want allow your mind to accept that your mother/sister/wife private hole should be shared with your friend or some stranger, its realy corrupt your soul in almost every way. In real life i dont think this kind of fetish have any benefit at all, unless you want start family prostitution business with your relative as employee. And there still lot of fetish i dare not to talk about from bsdm to beastility. Try to think that porn fetish like this same like mixed wine with gasoline, you know its dangerous and may cause death, yet you still drink it, because you curious what is taste like. Stupid right ? If you already know , then next time dont do it again.

    2. Use porn excessively, dont know where and when to look at it. For example watching porn while we are in work place,or school, or church. If porn = alcohol, you always sober everytime and everywhere. And nobody likes if you always in "drunk" state, everyday.

    3. Watching porn alone without have legal patner beside you, now here the things,if you watch with your legal patner / spouse its okay, because after you getting turned on, you can practice and have fun together . Unfortunately you watch it alone , and now getting horny without have somebody help you release it, and there we go the "Legendary Prince of Fap" is born. So next time you alone want to watch porn in your room, ask yourself how old i am " Do i should continue to be the Legendary Prince of Fap for the rest of my age ?" If the answer "yes", please continue what you do, and dont foget share it on twitter :XD

    4. Using porn as brotherhood community, not only you guys include as part of your life style, its also become the ways you connect with your friend, ohh crapp, now this even more worse then previous. A group of alcoholic people will always gather to get drunk together, now imagine a group of chronic porn user, i bet they will be creating fapping tournament in the future , ways to go my friend

    5. Mix porn with reality, for example you just met beautifull girl, in the park on sunny days, however rather go on and say hello and start polite "Conversation" , you just stare her breast and thigh coldly from a far, because right now , you mind wander replay some of hardcore scene,with current condition like that that, its will be amazing perhaps miracle,if you have any "girl friend" at all, unless she was desperate enough or also share same hobby together. Cant say no more .........

    6. Apply your valuable porn knowledge and skill into wrong people, well if you realy gifted at cunnilingus its will be great if you apply it to your girlfriend however, because you so pathetic and cant get any, you ended pay random female, to apply it. God know after all the hard work you give to her you ended get STD on your tongue. Conggrats mate you just graduate with flying colour, to bad they dont have anything like love, emotion or trust to give except "sexual disease", dont forget to come again next month, especially after you just get your pay check


    I dont judge i also dont blame, so if you feel you already done just 1 from 6 point above this, then its time for you to stop porn immediatelly, because clearly you mind is not adult yet, not later, not tomorrow, but today !!!!

    However if right now you dont break any rule from 1-6, then feel free to enjoy porn with your legal patner, because clearly you are responsible adult person who have "Adult" minds. Now if this world have lots people like this, surely sexual crime will drop to its lower, and more importanly less young people getting free AIDS everyday


    Nut Shell Explanation


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    Some of you guys perhaps ever said something like NoFap no porn for xxx days , and many people including me try the quest, only to realize that at some point you gonna slip over, why ? Because NoFap no porn stuff is only half way part of recovery,its only able to compress your sexual craving without know how to release it on the positive ways, and what matter worse, just because you dont choke your cock for straight 90 days for example doesnt teach you how to protect yourself when you get exposure on porn material both fiction or real life as well. You may tied your hand at your back, but you cant tied your mind because its doesnt have phsycal form, that the sad reality. True recovery indication, is you can control your mind and your body as well and on top of that, even you exposure yourself with porn material both visual and physical . Literally you can sit beside naked women without getting turned on, its simply amazing.

    If you guys truly do NoFap no porn just for 7 days straight, like it or not if you see one tiny pic of women wear bikini is already enough to turn you on, and you notice your body reaction react so hard, and there we go , relapse moment on the count 3,2,1 go !!! (typing xxx words on the google)

    That why many people failed on this quest, because they missing the important piece, in order to heal yourself , you need to clean your heart and master your own will power, and all that recovery coming from your "SOUL". While its may sound ridicullous to believe it, this stuff is real deal, by the end you finish this guide, you can test yourself, there will be no lust involved on it, only feel pity and compassion, and as bonus, you will find that people will like you even more.

    Step no 1 : NoFap No Porn

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    Welcome to community bro [​IMG]

    As crazy as it sound you realy need some detox first, in order to set your brain straight, follow this step :
    1.For people who feel themself as addict then goes for 7 days straight, no more no less
    2.For people who feel only mediocre junkie then goes for 3 days straight no more no less
    3.For people who feel sexual deviant, that crave something unnatural from incest, rape, gangbang,beastility,necrophilia, bdsm,hardcore,voyeur,exhibitionism, all that stuff beyond normal intercouse then its will be recommend to aim full whole 1 month, however if you feel yourself cant fight the urge then at least you must pass minimal 7 days

    The purpouse of this test to prepare both your body and mind for final test, and please try not relapse during the proses so you dont need to reset the counter from zero again.

    Step no 2 : Learn Breath Control

    Sound easy right ? Nope at all, actually this part probably the hardest because its require you to sit down, take a breath and focus your mind. Its take lots of practice, but like we learn to ride bicycle, as hard and impossible to begin with , eventually we get it.

    Try to relax yourself, find someplace comfortable to sit,already found the place it ? Good , now its time for you to learn Pranayam, there couple method to do that, google wiki or just use this simple method

    Bhastrika Pranayam: Bellows Breath

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    Breathe in deeply through your nostrils. First, feel the diaphragm move down, allowing the lungs to expand and forcing the abdomen out; then feel your chest expand with your collar bones rising last.

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    Breath out quickly through your nostrils. Feel your collar bones dropping, chest deflating, and abdomen shrinking as the lungs collapse. This process of exhaling should be much faster than the process of inhaling -- almost like a rapid deflation.

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    Repeat the process. When correctly done, your chest will expand when you breathe in and deflate when you breathe out. Continue doing this for 5 minutes.

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    With practice, speed up your breathing. Beginners should always start slowly to avoid hyperventilating, but over time, it will be possible to turn this into a rapid breathing technique.

    Step no 3 : Accept lust as part of your nature, do not fight it, but rather embrace it as part of yourself

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    I know i know, while seem its was almost impossible to do that, but that was the key essence of it, in Tao method, by simply reject your lust your just create alter ego, so without realizing it, accidently you give lust a power to made a former image of yourself that you despise more then ever.

    By embracing it however, you just neutralized that lust power, render its ability to take control of your mind and body,so there will be no more angel and evil dialog debate inside your head. There will be only one voice, your mind that it

    How to do it :
    1.Learn to accept your evil side as part yourself, rather reject it, have you see some meeting therapy , where most its member introduced themself like this " Hi my name is Josh, i am an sex addict", they always say it over and over everytime there is a meeting. This is example how people try to embrace their dark side. Go look yourself on the mirror, and say it loud and clear without shame "I am and addict"

    2.Realize that sexual is a normal stuff same like we eat and drink. What made lust is powerfull because you give it power via porn hype, realize it or not when we talk about porn, we made porn something that have some kind of power, that must be pursued like fine arts, nude scene, sexual variation is same like food variation, do you hype about food you eat now , no probably not, we eat in order to sustain our life, and we have sex in order to sustain our line of generation. Women genital, male genital is tool of reproduction, if you say you feeling aroused looking human genital, then stop for a moment, ask yourself do you getting turn on by looking female cow genital ? No i believe you not. And put this idea, that human body is same like animal body, if you not turn on by animal body, you also will not turn on by human body as well. See its all about "Mind Perception"

    3.Realize that your erection, happens normally because its was your pure body reaction, however your mind not wanted it, so in nut shell, you separate your mind and your body, and erection without mind to support it will go down faster similiar like Erectile dysfunction effect, and how that possible in healthy robust body of your ? By simply remove "Lust" from your mind . So next time, try this magic tips, put your finger touch your forehead and say loudly " Its all from my mind" , and you can see goes down normal like nothing happens, why ? Because you just cutting ties between your mind and your body to made connection.

    Step no 4 : Testing yourself againt temptation

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    Now here come the crucial path, if you do it right and pass on this test just ONCE !!!! ONLY ONCE FOR ALL YOUR LIFE !!! Then Conggrats welcome to "Enlightment State" and believe me "YOU WILL FREE FROM LUST FOREVER"

    You can even try to exposure yourself to whatever porn material you have and even hire a hooker to do strip dance in front of you, but in the end you will feel no lust, but pity and compassion.

    As ridiculous as its sound,its very possible actually, because you already know your LUST button on/off inside yourself, and by controlling it, you can use it anytime and anywhere you feel "Lust" is realy required, for example if you doing procreation with your wife. You can do that, that you can proud to say "I able to master myself"

    Ready to begin your test ? if so lets do it [​IMG]


    Test 1 (15 -30 min):

    - Open your porn collection or go find one, watch it, every lewd scene, every of your favourite moment, if you feel getting turn on, its okay, its normal dont freak out, now its time to test your practice on Pranayam, breath like you have been practice, you body will be feel relax, then put your finger on your head and repeat after me " Its all from my mind" , by combining mind control and breath practice, you will notice that your "little brother" become normal again despite right now you watch the most hottest scene, that usually knock you down.

    See the sex scene in from of your eyes ? Now think you just watch animal have sex, and its just normal and nature ways, nothing to be exaggarate, there is nothing interesting or shame, is just part of life. If you see leaf blow by the wind ? Dont its part of nature ? What interesting on that.

    What you do right now is quite similiar like Buddhism version, where Buddha is being seduced by demon, and by seducing that mean will show all lewd scene and erotic graphic.If you manage to feel normal, then conggrats you just one step away from enlightment

    Test 2 (10-20 min):
    - This will be involves FAP, so dont take this extreme test of will power if you cant pass the first. Same like first test, only this time you added fap, do breath pratice and mind controlling, and self suggestion that what you see right now is some animal try to reproduce, your body will denied it because your body feeling yourself is in the middle of intercouse, but your mind say you dont have any at all. There will be conflict of interest between your body need and your mind want. If you play it right, then you can come into conclussion that you can separate your mind and body experience, its part of nature way of your body react to something and there is nothing connection within your mind at all.


    Sure your "little bro" will hard when getting stimuli from outside, but as soon you stop the stimuli, so does the erection, and its will turn back normal.

    With your eyes set on movie, your right hand will stroke slowly and gently squeeze while your breath maintain Pranaya technique , your left finger will be on around your forehead, and your mouth will repeat this word "its all from my mind"

    Doing this correctly will result your "little brother" never realy hard enough, despite getting stimuli from your hand, all because your mind try to disconnect with your body during process. Once you manage to reach this state. That the sign you almost graduate with highest grade

    Tips : relax, take a breath, and always stroke slowly and dont freak out if your pre cum leaked because its also part of natural way your body prepare you to have intercouse, however stop FAP process if you feel you will reach your climax, this is quite dangerous process called Edging, only do this when you just do test 2 and i realy recommend to not overdue this test over and over, succeed one time is already enough for your life time, this is not some kind of training stuff that the more you do , the more better you got. You only need one time succeed.

    Test 3 : Meditation (5 - 15 min)
    - Horray you past the test 1 and test 2 all the hard work is done, but before all the happiness, you need to take care of yourself first, all that test create conflict between your body and mind, so your mind probably work very hard to overcome your body, and right now you wil get strong headache or feeling heavy inside your forehead (mine experience), what you need to do is meditating.I dont know if you are already know how to do meditation or not but i give mine method :

    1.First we need to create atmoshphere and music will be part of it, i prefer mahabharata song and buddhist song for this

    Mahabharata


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    2. Find comfortable place to site, and close your eyes, if you can mimic hand movement of buddhist prayer (mudra) or yoga practice like this below is even better. Try google many form of mudra seal in google image and pick one that suit your mine

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    3.Now close your eyes and try to focus on part of your forehead, especially part of where the headache accumulated , some Taoist or buddhist called it "Thid Eyes". Keep focused while hearing song, eventually you see bright light swirling created like vortexx,you found it that good sign, try to smile during the process, that is once the song is finished, so end of your meditation , and finish it with loud voice "Ouummmmm" while your lips create O, trust me its will vibrate entire your head and you will feeling energized after it.

    4.Once meditation is finish, you will notice extra calmness and the headache is gone along with it, now find mirror and smile, look it on yourself, stare it for a while and eventually your just realize that you like your own reflection even better. There is quote saying " If you like yourself, so does other people around you especially girl" Why ? Because they feel attracted with your own vibration coming from your smile and positivity.And this is indicator what you done is right.

    Conclusion

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    If you able to reach this part, then conggrats your brain , no no no not brain, your SOUL has been rebooted, you can open porn anytime anywhere but will feel no lust, thus effectively this set of mind will free you from "lust" one of the seven sins that bound humans in this world.

    You can call yourself "Enlighment" or anything you want, but rejoice brother, you finally break the devil circle. There is literally million of dude in this planet still trapped in the "lust" and basically blind and never aware of that. Life without lust is quite amazing because now you can see people in different perception, and your kindness and gesture to female for example realy genuine out from your heart, not from you desire,lust,or selfish. And other people around you will respond by realy like you from their deepest heart

    If you dont believe imagine you going to church, temple or any religious site, try to pray on that place, what do you feel ? Calm,peace,relax, feeling safety, now try to imagine you go into brothel or ill reputate place, and try to pray where your friend fuck somebody beside you, and ask yourself how do you feel ? dirty, gross, unsafe feeling, tense.

    Now you can understand why people start feeling safe and love around you, because your body radiates the same feeling of religious place did, i call this a good ebb. You are walking temple right now.

    Have you hear word like this " I realy like him , i dont know why, but i feel good around him, he not rich, he not handsome, he not genius, but i dont know its seem everytime i spoke to him, i feel close and warm in my heart , i love him fully " or perhaps this words " I believe John is good for lead us, i know there is other people is more capable then him, but i just believe that he is the right one for lead us"

    That the power of "No Lust" because you vibrate good ebb, people will respond with same positive vibe too. Believe or not its your personal choice. I wrote here in order to help other people able to find "Enlighment" as well. I hope its your destiny to read and practice this as well



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    FAQ :

    Q : Will i relapse back into porn user ?
    A : No you not, because you already turn off your lust for good, even when you being exposure with porn material

    Q : What different between practicing your method vs convential NoFap no porn method ?
    A : Both is correct the difference its one attempt via endurance journey that simply there is no time limit at all ? Say 3 month , 1 years, until your brain simply forget how to deal with porn material, but its doesnt help you to stop the urge to have lust for someone else. The cons perhaps you simply dont know wheter you cured or not, because you try to deal with the problem by never face it directly. Only hoping time will cure all, which almost impossible unless you live like hermit in the distance village or mountain where you porn exposure lvl will almost none. Accept it we live in 21 century, where lewd image or erotic is always decorate our movie.

    While my own method attempt to deal the problem by eliminating the "lust" factor using unconventional method. This method is what chinese people call "fighting poison with poison" . However this method is quite dangerous, because you realy fight your own dark side face to face directly, its also require people to have strong will.

    Your body will do crave for sex terribly during NoFap no porn period, any erotic image surely send every cell of your body screaming "fap". At top of your lust, you pratice this method while looking your best scene and doing fap. And you try to disconnect your mind during the whole process, do you realize how danger the whole process is ? Any wrong movement will result you "cumming" immediately like volcano and undo the whole process. The pro "High risk high gain", the cons "There is big chance almost 89 % weak mind people will getting failed and relapse on the early time try"

    The method is quite extreme since its push your body and mind into its limit, however if you managed to survive the worse, then any other temptation will have very little effect on you. Because you able to disengange your mind from your body even while your vision full with lewd scene and your body on sexual stimuli, basicly you just let yourself getting attacked from visual and physical and defend it with only your mind at the same time.


    Q : If i remove my lust , then how i able to have normal sex ? I have a wife and girl friend , and i also adult as well
    A : You can but you will replace it with love, and actually its was feel damn good, because you do sex for good things and good purpouse, sex using love only can be done for valid reason where there is no malicious intend, pure lust in the other hand is animal pleasure after do it, you will feel dirty and tired, however if love , you will feel energized and clean, almost like you done praying or meditating.

    Q : Should i train my mind everyday with test 1 and test 2 ?
    A : No you not, once succeed test is enough, this test is not ESP mental training, in the contrary you just dirty your mind and soul in the long run. That why temple or religious place do not open beside brothel, or monk will not try to perform its prayer ritual in front prostitute who do sexual intercouse with his client. Just because you free from lust now doesnt mean you cant be corrupted again.

    Q : How about meditation ?
    A : Now that you can try everyday, its very recommend actually, you can even convert your sexual energy into spiritual energy that can be used to enchance your work for example.

    Q : So what actually the purpouse of this test ? Dont you say after do this i can be free from lust ?
    A : This test purpouse to give men like you a tool to combat porn, become cold turkey for 90 days straight is useless because its doesnt teach you how to combat it if you got exposure by porn material accidently or not, with this tool, not only you can fight the lust, you also can control it according to your will. However if you plan to getting exposure by porn material every single minute in your life, then you simply not pass the test at all.

    Why ??? Because the enlighment one, will feel no need to seek porn stuff, because its was part of natural life, and if he being exposure on it , he will feel nothing at all, and let me ask you question will you google image people eating hamburger at mc donald every single days? See that the same things.However if you always feel the urge to seek nude material, then you just not pass the test yet truly.

    Remember everything coming from your mind. Fighting lust begun not by stopping chock your cock, its only temporary band age, lust coming from many form, adultery for example, the secret desire to intercouse with random chick,stopping your hand to fap and close your eyes for watching porn doest mean will stop your mind to do sexual intercouse with random chick you saw at the side of bar, you also cant stop your mind desire to rape your friend hot wife or girl friend. You may able to tied your hand ,but you cant tied your mind,the only way to cure it by healing it from your "Soul" , and you can only achieve it using your "Mind" not your "lower muscle"

    Q : What benefit i get become "enlighment" one? Is that worthy enough ?
    A : All the good stuff from red edit you read abot NoFap + good vibe + increase will power + tool to harness your sexual energy, all good stuff that fapper and porn user will never get it even on their dream. Yep its worthy for every ounce of it ^^


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    Last edited: Jul 9, 2016

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