90 days today.

Discussion in 'Success Stories' started by Ghost., Jan 31, 2015.

  1. Ghost.

    Ghost. Fapstronaut

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    Hey guys,

    I'm very happy to report that I have, today, accomplished my goal. I've actually gone the whole 90 days. Reading success stories was and still is one of my favorite things to do on this forum, so here's my experience, some do's and dont's and my overall assessment of noFap.

    My experience

    So before taking this challenge on I suffered from social anxiety and an unnatural fear of rejection. But that's ok, you too can lead a life utterly devoid of sex, fun or awesome memories. I'm being sarcastic, but on a serious note I never really felt like I was living up to my full potential.

    In an attempt to not make this post too long, I'll just say this: No PMO makes you shine. The boost in confidence is such a refreshing breeze of fresh air words can't even describe. Sure you still have good & bad days, but the worst day on no PMO rivals the best day when on full PMO. It's that simple.

    Before this I dreaded the idea of weekends. I never had any plans. No real friends to speak of or people to do any activities with. "Weekend" for me usually translated in "two days of watching family guy". It's pathetic on so many levels I dont even. The life any of my fellow 21yo's would envy.

    Now? Now I haven't cleaned my room in almost 2 months for lack of time. I've gone from having close to no social life to having plans every single day. I go to the gym during week days with some cute female friends, play football and take german lessons twice a week plus a full time job. During the weekends I'm usually out with friends somewhere. Recently I've taken up snowboarding and I'm becoming quite a decent rider. Always wanted to do that.

    Do's and dont's

    Here's a few things that have helped me out along the way:

    Do's:
    • Train for discipline. PMO doesn't force itself down your throat. It's your choice. Always was. Choose not to.
    • Cold showers. Love`em. Take one before going out or to work. Your day will be better, I guarantee it.
    • Get out of your comfort zone.
    • Learn a new language, read, take dance classes, learn a martial arts style, get into winter sports. Actually get into any sport. Choose at least one intellectual and one physical activity you enjoy or might enjoy and turn them into a hobby.
    • Consider getting an accountability partner. Personally I didn't, but I can see how it could bring benefits.

    Dont's:
    • Don't install K9. I don't care how "secure" you think you are. If you wanna find porn, you'll find it. Not walking into a bar doesn't cure you of being an alcoholic. Comfortably being in a bar with complete self control does. The internet is your bar.
    • Don't rationalize. Unless "just one more time" somehow involves you, that hot co-worker, your room, and very few clothing articles then I don't wanna hear it.
    • For the love of whichever God you happen to believe or not believe in, do not throw away your smartphone in favor of a flip-phone to protect yourself from the big bag interweb monster. Seriously you're a grown ass man or woman, act like it. Read the first point of this list again if you're wondering why that's supremely stupid.
    • Don't let yourself down. You have to opportunity to change your life in ways you can't even fathom right now. Take that into account next time you think 2 seconds of gratification are worth anything.
    • Do not settle. Unhappy in your relationship? break it off. Want a relationship? start being outgoing. Shit job? quit. Shit major? Start over. No major? get one. Not pleased with your body? diet & gym. I don't even care about your age or how "late" you think it is for you. You get one life, and if you're not doing your best to make it memorable then you're not only effectively but actively being an idiot. It's never too late to be happy.



    My honest opinion

    Is that noPMO is top5 best decisions I've ever made. There's just no way to describe how much my life has improved over such a small period of time. Above all else though, the top super power reboot offers you is freedom. I'm free and confident in who I am. I respect who I've become.


    "If you wanna survive you have to be willing to die". In other words, no good story ever started by playing it safe. So get yo ass out there, fail, laugh it off and fail some more. You're capable of more than you know.
     
  2. Jiten

    Jiten Fapstronaut

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    Your post helps. I hope to see myself in your place in march.
    Congrats bro. Keep going.
     
  3. MRDRMN

    MRDRMN Fapstronaut

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    Thanks for that. I recently stumbled after 44 days clean. I dusted myself off though, got back up, and I am going back at it more determined than ever.

    You did essentially what I am intending to do. There are all sorts of tools out there to put up obstacles to PMO, but this is about willpower. I don't want to depend on software to force the right decision. I want to win the mental battle. My mind is always with me. K9 software or other blocks are not, and it will make me a better person.

    Very inspiring to see another make it.
     
  4. Ghost.

    Ghost. Fapstronaut

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    Thanks. Hope you guys make it :)
     
  5. joey1019swag

    joey1019swag Fapstronaut

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    Wow, wish I had your willpower. Hopefully I can do it!!
     
  6. master90days

    master90days Fapstronaut

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    Take a bow, mate! Well done for the 90 days. So what next for you?
     
  7. MadHatter

    MadHatter Fapstronaut

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    Wow! Inspiring post, my man!
     
  8. thedaring9

    thedaring9 Fapstronaut

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    I just like to say, thank you! I too will be saving this story and its pointers.
     
  9. seventyniner

    seventyniner Fapstronaut

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    Kudos! Great post, sounds like you're really making the most of life. Inspiring!
     
  10. iceman40

    iceman40 Fapstronaut

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    Yes I agree with all you stated: you are an adult and you make choices. Man up and take control of your life!!!
    I'm in the process of manning up. :cool:
     
  11. Wampa

    Wampa Fapstronaut

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    Thank you for sharing your story & tips. It is really inspiring post. I am really looking forward to achieve same experience as you did. Thanks.
     
  12. Jimbean

    Jimbean Fapstronaut

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    Hi guys,

    Ghost congratulations man! Today is my 90th day as well! It feels great.

    A couple of guys have said this is about will power. Ghost, do you think that's what made the difference?

    For me, willpower on its own was never enough. I always still went back to pmo. Instead it was growth in my self awareness which fueled the willpower that finally made the difference. Awareness of who I am and what I am made for (we're made for something much greater than porn and masturbation!), and how much of a reduction and lie pmo is compared to the beauty of living your life in the world and being loved by a real woman. When I was aware of those things, the decision not to look at porn was still absolutely a conscious decision but it was much easier.

    Willpower and awareness together are much more powerful than willpower alone. My recommendation is to try to grow in your self awareness and what it is that you are really truly looking for in life. Spending time reading and speaking with people i trust about this and people i can follow and who challenge me has been really helpful for this. Also, try to see something beautiful each day. Could be a sunset, a piece of art or music, a beautiful car, whatever. This helped me be aware that my heart was made for something beautiful, not for the shriveled self absorbed thing porn is.

    Anyone else find willpower alone didn't cut it?
     
  13. sirfapstinence

    sirfapstinence Fapstronaut

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    Very inspiring. Thanks for sharing your journey and thoughts.
     
  14. marriedlady

    marriedlady Fapstronaut

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    inspiring stuff, many thanks

    Congratulations!! i agree with you in so many levels, it's about doing things differently for different results!! Sounds easy and logical, but without a plan and a lot of discipline, chances are, unattainable.
    Love the do's and dont's!!! Bravo!! keep up the good work, have fun in the process, "you are capable of more than you know" -- ghost :)
     
  15. ruso

    ruso Fapstronaut

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    Way to go!!! I'm sure to get to where you got you had to be willing to die and did die a couple of times and now you have survived :p. KEEP IT UP!!!
     
  16. crushurcravings

    crushurcravings Fapstronaut

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    I can't wait to hit 90 days myself. Congratulations :)
     
  17. YOGESH CHANDRA BHATT

    YOGESH CHANDRA BHATT Fapstronaut

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    thanks sir it was very inspiring
    will do those things, and congratulations on your sucess
     
  18. Ghost.

    Ghost. Fapstronaut

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    Next in regards to PMO? I don't plan to do go back to it. I do feel horny at times obviously but my mind never really drifts to the easy way out anymore. It becomes more and more natural after 50+ days.

    In regards to everything else? Make the most out of my opportunities and enjoy life as much as possible.

    For me it was. I can only assume your awareness and willpower go hand in hand, although it's easier to ignore awareness sometimes.

    Glad to hear it. I hope you too will reach your goals :).

    Haha, that I did. Which makes it all the more worthwhile.
     
  19. onwardandupward

    onwardandupward Fapstronaut

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    Well done, soldier.

    I appreciate the perspective- there's some great insights there.
     
  20. bennett92

    bennett92 Fapstronaut

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