53 yo, back on trail

Hello, I'm 53 and was last around here early in 2022. It was my first attempt to break free after a couple decades of daily PMO. I hadn't ever tried to stop before, but following some big life events (dad died, brother died, marital struggles) I began weekly zoom sessions with a therapist. After a couple months in therapy, I thought why not try to maximize that experience and quit PMO. It had contributed to my sexless marriage and lack of intimacy. And so I began nofap in early 2022 and got to approx 115 days. That was the first time I had ever stopped for so long since I began MO as a teen.

Over the rest of 2022 and all of 2023, there were periods of PMO and then new attempts at dropping it, but I would usually abstain for only 3-5 days, on occasion would make it to 7-10 days. There were a couple 2 and 3 week stretches mixed in. In between all of these nofap periods were PMO stretches of 2-3 weeks.

So, it was a bouncing between nofap and PMO, but as opposed to my pre-2022 experience with PMO (my mid 20s-late40s) I was making regular attempts to stop.

Now, I'm on 30+ days of nofap. This time is different though as I'm more aware of how porn substitutes (instagram primarily), testing erection/MO, and fantasy/ogling contribute to escalation to PMO.

I have a greater sense of my WHY, and will be writing more in the Ages 50-59 journal community.