27 Male addicted to PMO for 15 years Introduction

Justkindahere · Dec 26, 2023

Title says it all. At 12 years old I experienced porn for the first time. I knew I was addicted after my first sexual experience at 18. I was barely able to stay hard, couldn't finish and didn't know why. She advised that I stay away from porn for a while. Advice that was obviously ignored. Now, 9 years later, I am more addicted than ever and recently just lost a 4 year relationship because I kept breaking my promise to quit, couldn't get it up, and she left me. She's not the first instance of PMO affecting my romantic life, either.

No matter how awful the consequences I cant seem to shake this addiction. This is a desperate final act. Journaling and reaching out to an online community has always been off the table. Whether it be stubborn pride, or social anxiety, or putting my personal problems out onto the internet means that I've reached the lowest low possible. However silly that sounds, I'm here now, and I have to make the most of it. Princess Leia made a desperate attempt to reach out and beg for help from Obi-Wan, and she saved the universe. Maybe if I can attempt to do the same here, Ill at least save myself.

The longest I've been able to abstain from PMO in recent months was MAYBE 6 days. I've tried no internet, porn blockers, personal therapy, and I've tried no social media. My addiction always pulls me back with the utmost certainty. Its currently Dec 26, 2023, and with the New Year almost here, now has to be the best time. New Years Resolution be damned, Ill save that for the fitness goals. This Resolution starts with this intro post. Which hopefully has been done correctly..? With no online journaling experience, I genuinely hope so. You're my only hope.

Fighter_mode · Jan 1, 2024

Happy new year, bud. How are you doing on this journey?

also new here, similar age and similar background (a break up 2 yrs ago have made everything worse for me).

geminibro · Jan 2, 2024

Hey glad you're joining and making a change!
I also had a very similar view as you when it came to how I look at online forums and postings, it just seemed low as you put it. But I think I had it wrong because it does seem to help in the short time I've been here, it's like an itch that has been scratched finally and feels good to be honest and help. I too hope this is the way for me, if not I will find another way. I also hope you think the same way about yourself. It's never over, there's always a different way or maybe a way of doing old methods better. Who knows what might click for you, might be the unlikeliest of things, so keep searching. You'll come out stronger and wiser the more you try and eventually succeed. Don't be too hard on yourself also, and don't make it sound like a do or die challenge for yourself, in my experience it just tends to put unnecessary pressure on yourself and expectations. It's a problem just like everyone everywhere has one, we take it on day at a time and just continue the rest of our lives like normal. Okay to fail too you know, if you saw someone fail would you tell them to give up? No right you'd say try again you got this! So be kind to yourself and tell yourself you deserve to get better and good luck on your journey brother!
Sorry for the long post I just hope you find it a little helpful.

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27 Male addicted to PMO for 15 years Introduction

Justkindahere New Fapstronaut

Fighter_mode Fapstronaut

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