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120+ days. Honestly how I feel.

Discussion in 'Success Stories' started by ThisTime, Dec 16, 2019.

  1. Dec 16, 2019 #1
    ThisTime

    ThisTime Fapstronaut

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    Hey there NoFap!

    For the past 120 or so days, I have not watched porn, masturbated, or orgasmed. I have not touched my penis unless for taking a piss or scratching an itch. I have distracted myself from fantasies and let hard-ons go away naturally in time.

    And I am unbelievably proud of myself and confident in the way I present myself to the world. I can't tell you how awesome it feels to be sincere with others and honest with myself. I don't have to hide who I am anymore or lie to anyone. This quite possibly is the biggest benefit of NoFap for me.

    That being said, I also know that my journey isn't over, and might possibly never be over.

    Questions still constantly enter my mind: Will I ever masturbate again? Will I ever touch my penis again apart from having sex or taking a piss? When will I have sex? Will I ever allow myself to indulge in a fantasy and think about some image? Can I think about a real girl I know and find insanely attractive? What if the fantasy involving this real girl is simply a porn video with her face plastered on? What would the limits of this fantasy be? Will I ever allow myself to look at sexy Facebook photos of girls I know or TikTok videos in my news feed? What is up with every social media platform being so sexualized? Why is every single commercial on TV selling sex? When will these thoughts go away? When will I feel normal? What even is normal anyway?

    At times, I feel like I climbed the mountain and the wind is now permanently flowing through my hair. Other nights, sleep can't find me quick enough. Perhaps these questions and thoughts of ups and downs remind me I truly am normal. Through it all, I take everything day by day, simply because that's all I can take.
    Just make it through tonight, because everything after tonight is a separate battle. I don't plan on PMO-ing tonight, and hopefully ever. Yet, I also know I'll get there when I get there.​

    I believe in myself. I believe in this community. I believe in you. I love you. Sincerely.

    I try to post an update every 30 days or so, so feel free to check out my older content if you're interested. If not, no problem!

    See you in a month!
    - ThisTime
     
    ThisTime, Dec 16, 2019
    ThisTime, Dec 16, 2019
    #1
    Optimum Fortitude, on_a_mission4truth, TheFlash123 and 13 others like this.
  2. Dec 16, 2019 #2
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    Congratulations, ThisTime. :)
     
    Deleted Account, Dec 16, 2019
    Deleted Account, Dec 16, 2019
    #2
    ThisTime and on_a_mission4truth like this.
  3. Dec 16, 2019 #3
    metanite

    metanite Fapstronaut

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    I can relate to that bro. I think this is one of the most important things of this journey too!
    I´m glad your hard work is paying off, and hope the best for what´s next to come!
     
    metanite, Dec 16, 2019
    metanite, Dec 16, 2019
    #3
    ThisTime likes this.
  4. Dec 17, 2019 #4
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    Ya know, the past couple days I’ve been hesitant to really commit myself fully to going porn-free, because I just didn’t see the worth of doing so.

    This post, though - and especially your comment about confidence - is inspiring. I want to feel as proud of myself as you do of yourself.

    Count me in.
     
    Deleted Account, Dec 17, 2019
    Deleted Account, Dec 17, 2019
    #4
    ThisTime and metanite like this.
  5. Dec 17, 2019 #5
    clapas

    clapas Fapstronaut

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    I agree. And I don't know about your personal case, but in my case I can see it's going to take at least 1 year to be normal again, i.e. free of addiction damage and withdrawal symptoms.
     
    clapas, Dec 17, 2019
    clapas, Dec 17, 2019
    #5
    ThisTime likes this.
  6. Dec 17, 2019 #6
    SuperiorMan95

    SuperiorMan95 Fapstronaut

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    First of all, congrats man! Proud of you! Very good job and great to see guys out there killing it and actually making it happen.

    Second of all, I agree. You must stay vigilant because although 120 days is an impressive achievement especially given your history (which I'm assuming is bad). But one must not be content with mediocre gains. The real battle is the long battle. It's how you are going to do in the long run. It is true that you must take it day by day.

    Ever heard of Miller's Law? Check out this Wiki article on it:
    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Magical_Number_Seven,_Plus_or_Minus_Two

    It's basically a law that has some pretty strong practical implications. Here are 3 practical sentences on the issue:

    • We can only hold 7 (plus or minus 2) bits of information in our memory at a time. This number was devised by George Miller’s 1952 study at Harvard University.
    • We’re constantly ignoring distractions in order to focus on this limited amount of information.
    • When we’re reading, there are “pug dogs” (distractions) everywhere!
    The point is that we have a very limited amount of information to focus on. So keep your focus clean AKA taking it one day at a time, etc. I think we unwittingly over burden ourselves with information sometimes which causes us to completely break down in terms of focus.
     
    SuperiorMan95, Dec 17, 2019
    SuperiorMan95, Dec 17, 2019
    #6
    ThisTime likes this.

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