So, do not hate yourself. You can find your suitable partner and fulfilling relationship which solves your problem completely.
I think your struggle to avoid Femdom will not work. It is what you truly want deep inside you. Instead, you should think about finding a man who is into femdom and suitable for you who can fulfill your desires. You have a need and there is an answer for it outside.
Just another quick welcome. The community on NoFap is vast and diverse. Check out the NEW USERS: LIST OF REBOOTING RESOURCES https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.php?threads/new-users-list-of-rebooting-resources.50878/ You will find your own support system. Look around the forums and profiles, there are many friendly people here.
Why not say hello to a few? Start with @2525 , @vxlccm , @I_can_and_I_will , @IAmJustAGuy , @weddingnails , @PatrickR , @Roady , @yashu11 , @Beamer , @CrushPornBeneathYourFeet , @Arohamystic @MLMVSS @Rising Sun !! @Ready to be healthy @Struggle Bug @Evig Faith . There are many more great people on here, but open these profiles and just say hello.