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40 Year Old guy - looking for support at DAY 0

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by Smartboyj, Jan 14, 2017.

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  1. Jan 14, 2017 #1
    Smartboyj

    Smartboyj Fapstronaut

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    Hi Guys …. I’ve only recently come across PMO support on YouTube and from there I found this site!!

    Ok I’m 40-year-old guy who has struggled with issues with PORN addiction for most of my adult life. I’ve done a lot of work on myself and I know that I use porn to run away from life and problems. I wouldn’t have always had much self-esteem or self-worth, worried about be judged and suppose issue with social anxiety!!!

    Over the last number of months, I’ve really pushed myself in life to try new things, meet new people to work on the self-esteem and self-worth issues.

    And even after doing that work and knowing why I relapse I still fall into the same dark trap…

    But after reading everyone’s story’s here I feel inspired!!!

    I’m starting at DAY 0 and like approaching all big problems I want to break it down into smaller tasks. So, I want to set myself an initial target of getting to DAY 7 and hopefully build from there…

    I’d really appreciate any help / support / feedback you guys can offer….
     
    Smartboyj, Jan 14, 2017
    Smartboyj, Jan 14, 2017
    #1
    Lightseeker, Sandpaper, Dr. Jekyll and 5 others like this.
  2. Jan 14, 2017 #2
    CuriousOrange

    CuriousOrange Fapstronaut

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    Well done for identifying the problem and starting work. That's the first step.

    I'm 36 and I can relate to a lot of what you say. One of the great things about this forum is you realise that you are not alone, others are facing the same problems and dealing with them and often beating them! You can too.

    Working towards a day 7 target is a really good first move. It will be hard but it is ahieveable. Good luck!
     
    CuriousOrange, Jan 14, 2017
    CuriousOrange, Jan 14, 2017
    #2
    ShotDunyun and nomoredayone like this.
  3. Jan 14, 2017 #3
    Smartboyj

    Smartboyj Fapstronaut

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    Thanks for the message!

    It really means a lot, it’s amazing to know I’m not the only one going through this. I’m hoping with having this forum I can get to my first target.

    Appreciate it …
     
    Smartboyj, Jan 14, 2017
    Smartboyj, Jan 14, 2017
    #3
  4. Jan 15, 2017 #4
    nomoredayone

    nomoredayone Fapstronaut

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    41 here, very challenging but attainable and so worthwhile. I learned so much about myself from quitting, it's crazy how much more present I am in general. Porn is a dark corner of isolation, shame and misogyny. I didn't really see how much it affected me until i stopped, kinda like the fish not seeing water thing... Good luck to you and all of us
     
    nomoredayone, Jan 15, 2017
    nomoredayone, Jan 15, 2017
    #4
    Dr. Jekyll, ShotDunyun and Smartboyj like this.
  5. Jan 16, 2017 #5
    0020

    0020 New Fapstronaut

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    After 7 days, you'll feel the difference - increased energy, focus, and confidence. And then you'll know why you have no choice but to see this journey through. No going back.

    Today is the first day of the rest of your life. (Sorry for the platitude)
     
    0020, Jan 16, 2017
    0020, Jan 16, 2017
    #5
    Dr. Jekyll and ShotDunyun like this.
  6. Jan 17, 2017 #6
    Smartboyj

    Smartboyj Fapstronaut

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    Hey ... thanks for the message!! At day 4 and its going good so far.... I've been getting out for runs and meditating after , its been positive so far!!
    I just want to keep it going until day 7 and push on from there.
    So positive to know I'm not the only one facing this challenge
     
    Smartboyj, Jan 17, 2017
    Smartboyj, Jan 17, 2017
    #6
    Dr. Jekyll likes this.
  7. Jan 17, 2017 #7
    ShotDunyun

    ShotDunyun Fapstronaut

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    Step by step bro. It's gonna be difficult AF at the beggining, but I can feel that you are willing to make the change, thats the most important thing. I know you'll defeat this habit, start a journal and let us know how are you progressing
     
    ShotDunyun, Jan 17, 2017
    ShotDunyun, Jan 17, 2017
    #7
  8. Jan 19, 2017 #8
    Smartboyj

    Smartboyj Fapstronaut

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    Hey man , thanks for the message!!! I've made it to day 6 and very fucking happy about it.... but feeling really down and no motivation.... just going to try and get through the day and get out for a run tonight ... but I'm hanging in there
     
    Smartboyj, Jan 19, 2017
    Smartboyj, Jan 19, 2017
    #8
    ShotDunyun likes this.
  9. Jan 19, 2017 #9
    ShotDunyun

    ShotDunyun Fapstronaut

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    Fuck yeah, now lets go for two weeks bruh
     
    ShotDunyun, Jan 19, 2017
    ShotDunyun, Jan 19, 2017
    #9
  10. Jan 19, 2017 #10
    NickyP

    NickyP Fapstronaut

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    I'm in my second week. You can get to where I'm at no problem! And by then I hope to be in my third week.
     
    NickyP, Jan 19, 2017
    NickyP, Jan 19, 2017
    #10
  11. Jan 20, 2017 #11
    Smartboyj

    Smartboyj Fapstronaut

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    Thanks man .... At at DAY 7 !!!!!! Lets keep this going ......
     
    Smartboyj, Jan 20, 2017
    Smartboyj, Jan 20, 2017
    #11
  12. Jan 20, 2017 #12
    Smartboyj

    Smartboyj Fapstronaut

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    DAY 7 and feeling strong !!!! Day by day but new short term plan is DAY 14 ...... I feel very motivated today but just going to focus on today .... but I really appriciate the messages guys !!!!!
     
    Smartboyj, Jan 20, 2017
    Smartboyj, Jan 20, 2017
    #12
    ShotDunyun likes this.
  13. Feb 2, 2017 #13
    NickyP

    NickyP Fapstronaut

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    I think day 14 would have passed for you. HOW DID YOU DO?

    I've been absent from Nofap and that has had terrible results on my reboot. I have stayed away from PMO, but relapsed into random chat. It's worse, and I need help willing myself not to use that app.
     
    NickyP, Feb 2, 2017
    NickyP, Feb 2, 2017
    #13
    Smartboyj likes this.
  14. Feb 3, 2017 #14
    Smartboyj

    Smartboyj Fapstronaut

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    Hey ... well today I've made it to DAY 12 so I'm nearly there!!!! But all going well so far just need to keep focused and doing all the things that keep me in a good head space...
    How are you keeping overall ????
    In the past I would also have used random chat or sexting as a P substitute ... and convinced myself thats it ok , its not P its just some fun is what the voice in my head would say!!.....

    But really its just giving your brain the same "hit" that P gives it..... I think its just feeding the addiction in a different way!!! and it will eventually lead to P and all the dark places that brings us all...

    If you think about it , its like a recovering alcoholic saying its ok because Im not drinking whiskey im just having a bottle of light beer !!!! it will just lead to the next level...

    Try and give yourself some space from it .... I hope you are keeping well
     
    Smartboyj, Feb 3, 2017
    Smartboyj, Feb 3, 2017
    #14
    Empty Red Cloud likes this.
  15. Feb 3, 2017 #15
    Sugrum73

    Sugrum73 Fapstronaut

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    43 here, I've made it to day 35 today. Take it day by day, come here when you are feeling weak, thats why im here now.
     
    Sugrum73, Feb 3, 2017
    Sugrum73, Feb 3, 2017
    #15
    Empty Red Cloud likes this.
  16. Feb 3, 2017 #16
    nomoredayone

    nomoredayone Fapstronaut

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    Home sick today and the urge just came out of nowhere..Haven't been on here much recently and I am in danger of forgetting how bad pmo made me feel. Wanted to check in and be accountable. I am committed to getting though this addiction.
     
    nomoredayone, Feb 3, 2017
    nomoredayone, Feb 3, 2017
    #16
    Smartboyj likes this.
  17. Feb 3, 2017 #17
    Smartboyj

    Smartboyj Fapstronaut

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    Hey there.... how are you getting on????? Did you keep the urge at bay???
    Hope you are still in a good place
     
    Smartboyj, Feb 3, 2017
    Smartboyj, Feb 3, 2017
    #17
    nomoredayone likes this.
  18. Feb 3, 2017 #18
    Mateo89

    Mateo89 Fapstronaut

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    Hey smartboyj check out my ~month to month plan for NoFap success~ post. It may be of some benefit to you.

    Best,
    Mateo
     
    Mateo89, Feb 3, 2017
    Mateo89, Feb 3, 2017
    #18
  19. Feb 5, 2017 #19
    NickyP

    NickyP Fapstronaut

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    I think the dopamine hit from the sexting and (shamefully, because I have a gf) voice-to-voice talking is more powerful than P. And the triggering almost happens by itself in my head without any external factors. There's a satisfaction that is even deeper than O. Must not give in. Only reason it's been 5 days is I've been too busy.

    How are you doing today? It's so important to login here anytime I can and read and post a little.
     
    NickyP, Feb 5, 2017
    NickyP, Feb 5, 2017
    #19
  20. Feb 16, 2017 #20
    nomoredayone

    nomoredayone Fapstronaut

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    Hey yes I did, 6 months and counting. How are you doing?
     
    nomoredayone, Feb 16, 2017
    nomoredayone, Feb 16, 2017
    #20
    Smartboyj likes this.
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