I'm not triggered. I just know exactly why I know what I'm reading. I needed to be hit in the face hard, and repeatedly, with the fact that every time I spoke to another woman on the internet, I was cheating on my wife.
I'm confused. I thought this was your second post, but I see the other thread has another username and that member is pending deletion and you're a new member as of today. Even if you aren't the same person, take what she said as a warning. She was saving it for her husband as well: but she also said this: Just the fact that you're here, asking questions, shows you know something is off. And that you haven't told your husband. And, as others have pointed out, you may not be having a physical affair but how would your husband feel if he knew? (My husband sex chatted and I was devestated.) And then there's esculation to consider. It's very common.
Yes. All this. My husband, who is a PMO addict, and I, I'm not, BOTH used to fantasize about others during sex. Now, our sex life is better than it has ever been and neither of us MOs or uses fantasy. We both save it for only each other and our sex life is now amazing. It's a lie that monogamous sex needs some kind of outside "spice" to charge it up.
I would just let it go. You've said what you've wanted to say. In the end Chatgirl isn't you. What works for you doesn't always work for others. While you believe your replies are helpful they aren't helping Chatgirl, which should help you sympathize with her situation since she thinks the sex chats could be helping her when they're really not. If you continue talking to her in the manner you're doing you're going to hurt her not help her, and the same with her situation and her husband. Good intentions do not automatically make things okay, as we clearly understand by now.
I think my problem is asking this bunch of strangers anything. I've found most people here extremely self-righteous and too judgemental of my situation. Way to scare people off! Beat me up and hang me out to dry next time, at least I will know where I stand. Maybe my first mistake was posting in this forum. I will not make this mistake again. Goodbye, hope all of you really do practice what you preach.
Too bad that other woman is not here, it does sound like we have the same struggles. Perhaps she was also scared away from negative feedback to her story. But thanks for posting - it's nice to know there may be others out there who DO understand my situation.
I'm glad you found it helpful. The member is pending deletion but I don't believe the thread will be deleted. You can read it here. https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.php?threads/sex-chat-addiction.75259/ I don't believe there were any negative comments on that thread, no. I'm sorry that happened to you and that you're considering leaving the forum because of it. Unfortunately, that happens sometimes, however it is not the norm here at nofap. There are lots of very supportive, understanding and kind people at nofap. Not all, of course, and when inappropriate or harsh comments are made there is always the report button. It really does suck this was your first experience on the forum. However, I do hope you'll give it another chance. If you look back through the comments, I think many more were good comments than negative ones.
