Addicted to porn & masturbation for 8 yrs and spoiled my health.Urgent help needed :(

Hey man.

I can completely relate to you and your situation. I too suffer from the same addictions and MY health has also suffered a whole lot from it. I am new on this site and I am not sure what an accountability partner should do just yet, but at least I can tell you that you're further along the path to recovery than myself, because I only committed to a challenge of ONE week without fapping and I will be avoiding hardcore porn as much as possible, but other stuff like celebrity blogs that I browse every day, I just couldn't bring myself to stop those completely.

So yeah, I can be your accountability partner for sure, and you can be my partner if you so choose to, but first, let me find out exactly what it is that I can and should do for you as one. I feel your pain man and I hope you, me and everyone else in this site can let go of these destructive habits, because it all really messes up your whole life. I'm also very happy to have found this site.

Stay strong and best of luck!

James

 

Can really relate to your situation. In IT myself, work with stupid computers all day. But I don't use them at home anymore (including Xbox). Replying on my phone

Don't try and solve all you problems at one ( one battle at a time). Try and limit your internet usage at home, better still stop. The sooner you start to reboot the better.

Walking into work helped me, gets you out of the house and can interact with people. Something simple if your shy. I did a few evening classes, just for something to do in the evenings.

It takes time and can be very frustrating. Once you start to respect your own body you will look and feel better.

Can't help with god. Understands he (or she) forgives so don't worry about it.

Laugh it could be worse ( we're not crack addicts)

 

Man, you are in the Right Place, I unerstand what you feel because I also work with computers, and I'm a christian also. First of all, I recommend you to join the NofapChristian group, its awesome, peopple share a lot of things that will help you in this battle.

About feeling guilty, brother jcmonkey posted this video on the group:
[video=youtube;wm1LbIlmtfg]http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=wm1LbIlmtfg[/video]


It helped me a lot and made me see how Gods loves us, and Despite Hating sin, he loves ths sinner and want to helps us to have a Better Relationship with Him.

Please, do not try to stop PMO thinking in God's anger or punishment, you will fail fairly soon. He loves you, and if you ask you'll be forgiven(you already know it, and then you will feel stronger to not fall into PMO again. Be aware that this will be dificult, VERY dificult. But if you keep controling your flesh, and have a healthy spiritual life, everything will be fine.


God BLess

 

Whats helped me the most was http://yourbrainonporn.com/ to understand the addiction better, and how "edging" and/or watching porn, or even seeing unintentially anything sexual, can bring you many cravings.. maybe not today, but a day or 2 later. On days where I research the subject I have added strenght.

Dont take this next comment wrong as I am a very religious person active in my church. What I'm doing this next time around is different and I am trying to keep religion out of PMO addiction. It's made a lot of different in my current attempt. Dont repress sexual feelings but rather, when faced with cravings, "choose" not to and tell your brain why not. Then, try to find a way to fill the void you are facing which is giving you a craving. Find something positive to do instead that would reduce the reasons of the cravings. like, if you are stressed, go for a walk. if you are tired, get some sleep. if you are bored, find something to do.

From a book:
"Religion's attempt to deliberately repress is similar to Twelve Step's because the addicted person asks the deity he believes in to rid him of his addictive desire. But religion goes one step further. It tends to morally condemn you if you experience a "wrong" desire."

im only 6 days PMO free but this method has made this one go much easyer than any other approach i've tried.

 

Thanks for explaining what an accountability partner is and should do. I should have read the FAQ and the newbie section of the forums first before posting. But as I said, it would be great to have someone to discuss this subject and problem with because I have always pretended I could hide it and I don't trust anyone enough to ask for help or even talk about it.

We can help each other in our path to recovery and I promise to do my best to support you in your efforts.

I made a thread with my introduction and details about my issues here: http://www.nofap.org/forum/showthread.php?7363-A-sick-sick-person-looking-for-a-HUGE-change&p=42475#post42475

So if you want to know more about me and my current and past situation, read through that. If you still want to be my partner and have me be yours after that, then that's great. Let me know here or via PM if you want.

Take care and be well.

 

Hi ronaldpaul
You sound fairly low. I've been there, spend too much time working or worried about being made redundant ( many times over the last five years) and cutting out all the activities I used to enjoy because porn provided a quick release. I'm slowly rebuilding my life its painful and a daunting at times.

Think about achieving a better work life balance. Don't work from home or out of hours; do your hours then go home they won't thank you any more.
Can't stress this enough cut down your internet and computer usage ( gaming as well). In the short term find activitias that will occupie your time, do the house work iron your cloths redecorate. I did a ton of diy while I was rebooting. It gives u a goal to achieve improves your living environment, even if u think u can't, anyone can use a paint brush.
Learn to cook. Use your lunch break at work to plan and lean about food. Look forward to buying it and creating a dish. Read men health may to get some ideas.
The images will fad over time has new experiences take there place. Fantasy is OK as long as you can relate to in real life the more you go out into the world the healthier the experiences u gain. If you need to FAP do so but no external stimulation.
Start small try and find an activity u can get involved out side of work and away from the computer. Avoid therapy groups like AA etc you don't need to be around negative people right now. Oddly the church might be able to help get involved

Today thou, just try and leave the house and go for a walk buy some milk, stroll round a park. Walk tall make eye contact.

It's easy for me to type and preach. I struggle everyday with confidence and body image. But I'm ready for that fight now.

Your normal not some monster, keep telling yourself that.

 

Hey I need help also with quitting porn and the youtube video about Joseph helped me, thanks for the video. the thing I liked about it is when he said "Don't trust your flesh because it will fail you" that's really true and I can see that, no matter how I try, I'll always fail, I think the meaning here is put you in somebody's else hands or put the Computer in public or do something about it because you'll fail if you trust your own flesh by words if you keep your pc on its own place in your closed room.

And for Ronald. I live sedentary life-style too and you should be aware that it can cause diabetes 2 and much more things, you should check this out http://lifehacker.com/5879536/how-s...g-your-body-and-how-you-can-counteract-it/all

 

I know what it's like man. I can't stop watching at least five minutes of porn, even while I'm on this challenge. It makes it harder to not PMO, but I've managed to abstain for the seven days. But yeah, I know how it goes. You watch some porn, just cause your head is SO used to it and you crave the stimulus, and then you just HAVE to masturbate cause it's what you've been doing for years and to NOT do it seems so alien and weird.

Hang in there man, we should all get better at it with time (better at resisting the urge or channeling the urges into better things). I'm also having a hard time with porn but yeah, maybe you should try shorter challenges first instead of a FULL 185 days going cold turkey.

I think the reason I succeeded in mine was that I knew it was a short challenge and I figured I could do it easily and I told myself it would end soon. But yeah, it's painful.

Don't give up tho and best of luck.

 

Please look at my thread: http://www.nofap.org/forum/showthre...view-on-ejaculation-and-its-effects-on-health

 

Interesting read I'll look into it.

 

You're not alone! By bringing this issue out of the darkness into the light you have made the critical first step to victory. The power to overcome does not lie ultimately in us. Certainly, we have to make the decisions and follow through. But to follow through consistently takes us being willing to admit that we need help from God and once we understand as the Word says that perfect love cats out fear, then we start leaving the world of shame and guilt, because we start taking on a new identity, which is that of Christ because we are fully accepted by the Father in Him alone.

If you're His child then nothing you do or for that matter don't do, will ever make Him love you any less. Our sins will break our fellowship with Him for a time until we confess them, but the relationship that you are His child forever will never change. Take a listen to the links below which I believe will be of encouragement to you.

Praying for your success and believing that you will get there, brother!