Hey guys, I’m 20 years old and face difficulties abstaining. I’ve been doing it since 2016-17.

And those who do not invoke with Allah another deity or kill the soul which Allah has forbidden [to be killed], except by right, and do not commit unlawful sexual intercourse. And whoever should do that will meet a penalty.

Multiplied for him is the punishment on the Day of Resurrection, and he will abide therein humiliated

Except for those who repent, believe and do righteous work. For them Allah will replace their evil deeds with good. And ever is Allah Forgiving and Merciful.



Quran (25:68-70)

 

And how to fuel the drive?

 

Day 1: went to college, submitted assignments, lowered my gaze, did great in group discussion, felt very focused and energetic somehow. No fogginess. I wish to involve myself with the outer world, because my world’s just limited to my home. I must go out often. Have to pray qadha though because I couldn’t pray in college. Need to find my rhythm.

 

I do think that all the dopamine in my life is from fapping or gaming. I have nothing else that could give me those feels. I have decided to be outside my home now, I will go to college everyday, on saturdays and sundays, I’ll work out and and make the most of my days. Today was a good day, I felt extremely productive and useful, looked nice, and was confident. I will look forward to be more focused in the future. Its only day 1 and the focus makes sense because its day 1, the more I abstain, the foggier it becomes, I need to not depend on it and always be focused. I believe that I’ll be able to do it.

 

Relapsed, I ended up reading something again today. I guess I am not in a place to even read comics now if I really want to get over this. I think I must only read things I’m sure would not have that type of content and just stay away from the type of reading material that contains even little sexual content. 2 days and I messed up again. I wonder what really is going wrong.

 

I couldn’t even deal with the chaser effect, I anticipated it but I couldn’t fight it. Whenever I confess here, I start getting motivated again. I think this addiction is starting to demotivate me slowly but defeating it now would feel more satisfying than letting it get to me. I wish to protect my kids from this hell, because nobody deserves to get influenced by it at a young age. I really need to work on staying focused and determined when I’m at home. I am addicted and I accept that I am addicted, I’m not running away from the addiction, rather I’m facing it. In this case, it feels like running away is the only option and that is very demotivating for me.

 

I will try even harder now. Day 1 over, day 2 going strong.

 

Day 2 over , on day 3 now. Fuel the drive, I’m pretty sure its about working out, thats the thing I procrastinate too much about. I wish I didn’t but something really is stopping me from working out and I have no idea what. I haven’t worked out in months or years, don’t even remember the last time I worked out. As he said, we run out of motivation. I’m too energetic though like I really feel very very energetic, but its mostly because football used to be a daily part of my life and now its just not there. So i kind of used to do some sort of exercise daily and whenever I stayed home and didn’t do it, I ended up fapping. The other thing is that, if I go outside and see girls in those revealing clothes, I get some urges but its only when I’m alone that I end up giving in to those urges. I lower my gaze, but with those revealing clothes, even the first look does enough damage. First look is allowed but you should immediately lower your gaze afterwards, but first look is only allowed if you accidentally see, it isn’t allowed if you see intentionally. But then again, even accidentally you end up seeing some horrible stuff. you could lower your gaze but they don’t even wear anything below. How much could we possibly lower our gazes? It is the most sensible thing to do though, I don’t have a better alternative to it anyway. If I recite the quran at that time, somehow it feels much easier. Quran is so pure for me, that all the impurity is removed from my head. I NEED TO FUEL THE DRIVE!!!

 

Also, I don’t really earn money, and I find it really difficult to ask from my parents. I’ve never liked asking for money, but I believe that working out is something that would really help me but I overthink about it too much. Am I in place to ask for money? Shouldn’t I be determined first to work out then ask for money? But wouldn’t I go to gym if I’m receiving money that was too hard to get for me? I could earn and it could be easier for me but asking my parents definitely the toughest part for me lol. I think it would further fuel my drive though so I need to convince my dad to get me a gym membership. I need to get myself out of my comfort zone and actually work on myself.

 

I must fuel the drive. Day 3 over, on day 4 now.

 

Played good football today, won by a large margin. I must say, I’m not impressed by people who play against me. I feel like my team is really bad and if we win with ease, its not really as fun. I want to be put in a position where I have to try very hard. I must fuel the drive.

 

Alhamdulillah, I’ve started working out. Its just a few sets of push ups everyday. I wish to increase the momentum gradually. I did not have time to do pull ups today. Yesterday, I did a set of pull ups as well. Kinda cool.

 

Day 4 over, Day 5 going strong, heading to college, traveling at the moment.

 

I must fuel the drive, almost at the end of day 5. I did not get any urges or thoughts this week. Not even a tiny bit. Prayer really protects you but fueling the drive might just be working for me. Let’s slowly increase our workout. Also, I’ve been eating healthy, I don’t drink much water but I am trying to drink more and stay more hydrated. I am developing healthy habits so I’m content about it. It wasn’t that difficult. Anyway, the drive must be fueled, so there’s that. Believe me fellow fapsters, once you develop healthy habits, you will be content and happy enough, and will not have much desires. You will gain confidence, because of those healthy habits. Alhamdulillah!

 

Also played a bit of football casually, some passes with college friends, I like my life, I wish to do better in my life! Alhamdulillah for everything!!!

 

Day 5 over, day 6 is not that difficult, I walked a lot and ran a lot today, my college is very far from home, so sometimes to save money, I don’t travel all the way using transport vehicles, I sometimes walk half the way. And the masjid is also far from my college so sometimes we have to get there after one class and before the next starts. Its very difficult but me and my friends we have to do everyday for asr and maghrib, may Allah reward my friends for working so hard. My calorie intake is however low, that feels like a big problem for me, I now understand why my body was getting weaker and weaker, it is very disappointing that we think that we are so hungry that we will be able to fulfill our calories for the day but you can only eat so much in one time. I’m very sad about it, I wish to eat at more times. Especially in the evening when I am in college, its like im fasting everyday which is very concerning because im also burning calories, infact, Im burning more calories than I’m actually getting from my meals. Fuel the drive sure, but someone here told me I have to eat healthy and eat good. I must develop healthy eating habits and I must fuel the drive.

 

Guys so I come here and I only need suggestions for what I should eat that is easily available and rich in protein/calories. Burning calories is easy, its getting calories that is very tough. Please guysss, it is a request.

 

Let me know for both, foods which have a lot of protein, and also foods that has calories and protein not as much. I really need some suggestions.