[30-CHALLENGE] THE THIRTY DAYS CHALLENGE !

12/30

 

Relapse after 14 days of challenge, 22 total.
Well, get up!
0 of 30.

 

0/30. Why do I want to do this when it’s so hard? 1) to be in control of my life - never to be pulled around by an addiction 2) to be a better man - you are what you regularly do. 3) porn screws up the way you look at women and interact with women. This is hard and very tiring but it IS worth it and it IS the right thing to do. For me and those around me

 

Day 2/30

 

8/30

 

5/30 (Poniedziałek, 15.04.2024)

5th day, but almost relapsed today.
I need to change my life in more ways than merely PMO. Unfortunately it wont be enough. I have no delusions about it. I always knew that. PMO, and getting fit it's the most basic thing. I just wish that when I can take care of these things I will at least get more hopeful I would be capable of handling other stuff.

 

Day 0

 

13/30

 

still 5th day
note to self: merely abstinance is not recovery

 

1/30

 

Day 19/30 checking in (43 days total)

Too right. This is one of my big reasons too.

Great to keep in mind

I'm off to the gym in 15 mins myself.

I've found it super helpful being more social in the last month or so. Partly cos there's a girl - even tho I'm not attracted to her, it's been great growing a friendship and feeling accepted and connected. The triggers for turning to P & M are dwindling.

 

Day 0

 

Was absent some time, and relapsed a lot. Want to give it a new try now. Day 2/30

 

6/30 (Wtorek, 16.04.2024)

6th day, but not as clean as I hoped for. Unfortunately in the morning before I go to a gym (at least I do it everyday) I usually feel very lowely and lie is always the same „I will just take a peek”. I stopped myslef after downloaded sth but still hardly a clean victory. I like that its day 6, becasue I feel stakes are higher and I can finally test myself. Anyway when I PMO it's always out of boredom. It's never horniness. It's been so long I actually felt anything remotely like that. So thats what I'm working with.

I'm on a roll regarding PMO, and eliminating sugar, junk food and going to the gym everyday. Unfortunately I'm struggling with concentration, any reading for pleasure or not and procrastination. I'm very anxious. I hope that PMO and these few new dietary implenetations will give me some opening and will be able to start read regularly.

 

9/30

 

2/30

 

Day 0

 

7/30 (Środa, 17.04.2024)

7th day, up till now totally clean. havent been this far for quite some time now.

 

Day 20/30 checking in (44 days total).

 

10/30