Ok—Trackers are not required , do it or don’t do it . But please know it comes across super arrogant when you hide your mess and proceed to criticize others or talk like their pain is insignificant or irrelevant. Rant done. Edit : “trackers are for personal accountablity. If you opt out of that , cool— but be sensitive to those who have opted in.”
That's really harsh, dude. There are plenty of reasons that people don't use trackers. Have some understanding. Have you ever actually talked to people about why they don't have a tracker, in an effort to understand them, instead of just getting pissed and judging them as arrogant?
I used one for a long time but I could never keep it updated because I relapsed so frequently. It kept crimping my style so I deleted it yesterday.
I removed mine since the streak method did not help me with my issues with perfectionism. Perfectionism for me robbed me from seeing the bigger picture in terms of progress, recovery, and hope. Using a monthly tracking method has helped me retain a positive attitude and outlook even in the midsts of serious falls. Use the method that works best for you. I don’t view people who use the streak method as being inferior. Some people do really good with that approach. I’m not one of them.
Yes, I completely agree with this. That's one of the main reasons I always go back and forth between having a tracker and not having one. Another reason I recently deleted mine is because I don't want to feel obligated to be on the forums all the time. Sometimes I have a reset and I don't want to have to immediately come here and report it, but then if I don't do it right away, I forget. So my counter was never accurate, and people would congratulate me on however many days I was at, and I would have to say "actually, that's not accurate." I have my own calendar I keep track with. And quite frankly, just because you want to be a part of this community and support each other in some way, doesn't mean everybody on the internet is now entitled to know all of your business. Maybe I talk to my closer friends about resets, and I don't necessarily want everyone to know exactly when I've been up to no good. You're not entitled to that, and nobody is obligated to share that with you. That doesn't make them arrogant for wanting some amount of privacy.
Ok. Sorry @Castielle . I didn’t always use a tracker. I get that it’s a personal thing. I’m saying if you chose to not use (a self-reporting system Of where you are in this family of accountability) then be sensitive to the people DO choose to do so. As far as passing judgement — that’s what I’m ranting about. I have sensed judgement by those ready to give advice but not show their hand. Maybe someone will be able to explain my rant better than me ??
Yaaa guys, some people can be really mean if you hide your tracker, they'll whisper things about you behind your back..this isnt a surprising post.. A few of the reasons I've hid it in the past it was to stop thinking of the days for a little while or because I wanted to, when we used to be able to, put a picture up because we cant if our tracker is there, or just in general didn't want everyones eyes on it, it can feel pressurous at times..or too humiliating its true.. When I did finally show it it was either to gain some acknowledgement and encouragement or because I felt I would relapse soon..and showing it keeps me accountable and remembering my progress I have made and how far in I am by days.. I've never been rude or mean to anyone while my tracker was hidden? Lol, this sounds like someone did that to you recently and maybe they were being rude, we don't know the situation, but to say everyone is an asshole with their tracker hidden is a bit far ~
Are you asking if I’m mad at you? No bro, I am not. For real. This is not because anyone’s comments towards me, it’s because of how I saw a nofap dude with less than 5 days no pmo get “manhandled” by a guy who has no tracker but plenty of advice. I’m defending him here. I will try this one more time then y’all can take the thread wherever it’s headed. I’m saying : trackers are for personal accountablity. If you opt out of that , cool— but be sensitive to those who have opted in.
Show us the thread and you can also report it to the moderators. Rather than creating a post that generalizes an entire group of people in this community. I don't think anybody without a tracker ever claimed that they have more credibility than the ones that do.
I actually have had people act like my advice is meaningless because I had a low number on my counter or something, which is really dumb.
It's odd, but also not so odd at the same time. People equate a high counter with experience. There's something stranger though. I've seen people equate the number of likes with experience...
My counter is high due to lack of experience. My patented method of ceiling starring is all I've done.
I personally don't buy into the theory that you shouldn't listen to advice unless the person giving that advice is following it. People can give good advice and still be bad at following it themsleves, especially when addiction is at play. I mean, if a drug addict tells me never to do drugs because it will ruin my life, I'm not gonna be like "well you're not even following that advice, so I'm not gonna listen to you!"
Counting the days can be good or bad. It's sort of like having a scale in your bathroom if you are suffering with weight related anxiety and so on. In the latter case it's probably not a good idea to have a constant reminder of your weight around. The same can be said here. If you are having problems with things it can be a good idea to maybe not have a constant reminder of what your 'score' or 'streak' is. It's a bit narrow minded to just judge all people like that who don't have a counter. No one has any more or less credibility here than anyone and there is no award to win or bragging rights to be had. We're all doing this for ourselves and our own personal reasons. There really is no room for judgment of this kind.
How about that financial coach who tells you how to make millions, but his only source of income is his financial advice? If you're going to preach something, you got make yourself an example.
The phrase "No tracker, no credibility" is a fallacy anyways because people may choose to use other ways to track their progress. I use spread sheets, for example and only mark days I've hit a bump in the road, not how long I've gone. It helps with my own motivation since I dislike knowing what day I'm on. Or if you count alternative ways as a "tracker" as well, then nothing trumps sound advice.
