Personally I like to stare piercingly at people the whole time we are talking, like I am fucking their souls with my eyes. I do wonder sometimes if I'm coming across as unhinged by doing so. Thoughts?
Yes, as you describe this it´s rather an act of aggression and a trial for domination. Gorillas for example feel very provoked by this behaviour and many humans also. It can end in a stare contest and if not, it makes at least most people nervous and alert, being downstared like this. That is why people blink, smile and signal in many other subtile nonverbal ways their friendly peaceful ambitions, because then is permanent eye contact not necessarily invasive. Also it´s polite to stop or weaken this behaviour, if you notice the other person feels obviously uncomfortable. For shy introvert people for example it´s very stressfull.
Of course there is such thing as too much eye contact. It's normal to look into each others eyes while talking. And while they are talking you can look more. But while you are talking you should take slight breaks. If all you do is stare at them all the time without brakes you will end up looking like a weirdo.
Ya, what 010010010100000101001101 said.. but also, you have to make sure you're really listening to the conversation while looking into their eyes.. some people are very good at reading eyes and know if you're looking @ them a certain way or whatnot, you know, eyes aren't called the window to the soul for nothing.
Cool so take the cue from how the other person is being, look away when thinking, and if I sense that they think I'm weak for not staring them down, chokeslam them into the floor and beat them within an inch of their life. Got it.
^ Sounds reasonable enough. And honestly... If you chokeslam them to begin with, then you don't even have to worry about eye contact for the rest of the conversation. They'll immediately know who's dominant from the start Just makes everything a little more easy and simple, imo
If you like to fuck peoples souls with your eyes then yes, that's too much eye contact. They can already intuit your intent unconsciously anyway so you're just probably creeping them out.
Lol, talk about socially awkward. Yeah dude, tbh that's weird. The trick is to not let you eyes linger for too long but to move your gaze around a person's face.
Hey, I'm on the oppposite end of the spectrum here. I find myself not giving enough eye contact to people. The most awkward is when I look to make eye contact and they're already staring which intimidates me and makes me look away. So yeah, I think there is such a thing as way too much eye contact. Staring the whole time would scare me!
This sounds like too much effort to think about during a conversation with someone. It sounds like some of you are saying to choreograph every conversation you have with someone. Look away....here, blink.... now, turn your head slightly...here. Conversation is suppose to be pleasurable. This sounds insufferable.
I’ve had this issue as well, mostly towards woman, but I’ve learned it was due to my lack of confidence. I don’t have this problem anymore. I’m not sure if your situation is related to mine but maybe you are too self conscious. Idk I’m just taking a whack at it.
Depends on the person. If their brain is a subordinate brain, they will consider any small details of life as threats, much easier than those who have a winner's brain. Their brain will not go to fight or flight just because of eye contact. Often times if somebody is pissed at you for looking at them, they are in fight mode. Equally important, if they look away, even down sometimes, they are in flight mode in simple terms. I would say it is best to copy down the behavior of children who have a pure mind structure that does let them do eye contact as much as they want. Be high in serotonin and consequently you will be less worried about eye contact. To understand this topic, I link a video which I just watched now:
Oh, that is the trick. Thank you very much. We just get away from our Dopamin addiction and change it for high Serotonin and voilá. And life is fight, survival of the fittest, it´s capitalism end time anyway, right? The winner takes it all, take a chance everyone.
Eye contact is simply an extension of the conversation you are having with someone. You can lead, follow or keep pace with eye contact. If you want to “fuck peoples souls” through eye contact maybe you could just pull that back and learn to pace the conversation with your eye contact I’m a more disciplined manner. Might generate more respect from people than discomfort or them feeling intimidated. Do what works for you but people are not stupid. They read signals consciously and unconsciously. And if you send the message “ I am fucking your soul “ when you eye contact them they will know it. Who knows - maybe you only talk to people who like that sort of thing and they think you are a king - lol
I think if you worry too much about where you will look, you are just experiencing anxiety, that's it.
I COMPLETELY connect with this, and busted up laughing too!!! Most every conversation I have, ESPECIALLY if it's a professional one, I find myself struggling to NOT essentially stare them down. It's like I just have an aimbot in my brain focusing my eyes on their eyes the whole time, and me (the gamer/user) trying to find some way to break it up! It's seriously a major struggle!!! Your solution seems to be the *best* course of action, however. I'm gonna have to try this. Lol