Any thoughts on feeling ugly for your behaviors and preferences related to porn and sex? For me, my fixation is anal porn. But I don’t have that strong if a desire for it in my sex life. I just feel ugly inside, and it hurts my confidence and my ability to feel desirable to women, even though my personality and looks are mostly a non-issue. I don’t want to have the fixation that I have, and wish that my actions were better and more pure. In the same breath, what even is pure? Not liking sex? Not objectifying women in any way? I don’t want to feel so ugly all the time, but I feel that my actions are consistently ugly.
I think I know what you mean by feeling ugly inside. Actually I have found that doing NoFap makes you feel a lot less ugly in side the longer you do it for. It makes you feel pure and sincere and like you don't have to be ashamed of yourself. I am hoping you can experience this too.