How many PAs see the world this way?

When I was deep in the addiction, I would constantly objectify women.
Even when I didn’t want to I would catch myself wondering what they looked like naked.

I thought it would be funny (if I had the talent) to make a show about how a PA sees the world.
The idea was to represent everyone by a talking version of their genitals.
For instance an woman would be represented by a giant talking vulva with two not scaled correctly breasts for eyes.
A man would be a gaint talking penis.
They would interact like normal people without mentioning their appearance at all.
Like it was the elephant in the room nobody was talking about.

I felt like that was how the world looked to me.
In recovery, i don’t have that issue anymore and I don’t allow myself to think of people that way.

Still, i was wondering if anyone else viewed the world that way.

 

Metaphorically speaking, that's probably right.i got to the point where the objectification was the first thing I thought--what she looks like naked, sounds she would make, etc. shallow.

Everything becomes meat for the addiction's grinder.

 

I know I objectify people but I never obsessed over what they might looked like naked. For me, as a PA, my outlook on life is very bleak. Emotionally I’m either numb or depressed. I take no joy in anything and the hope that life will be joyful again is very low. I feel cut off from being able connect with others or empathize with them. Everyone feels like a stranger, even myself.

 

Well I kinda remember those days.. Hell days.. Now I look at women with respect. I talk to them without being so damn shy anymore. Good life.