Doubting the process?

I think it will work. It is different for us all. I forget what is said about forming a new habit but it is not overnight. That is what we have here, a bad habit, very bad. And the access to our form of bad habit is so easily accessible, I dare say than any substance you can abuse. Hell this one can be dang near free and at an inexhaustible supply.

So like is said , we must retrain ourselves to do something different.

Let's be honest, if having an o didn't feel so good this would be easy to stop, but that is not the case.

 

Yeah I'd be lying if I ever said that I didn't doubt the process. I've never really had a serious history with drugs in the nofap process so I can't say much on that subject. Any times I have thoughts of being stuck this way I try to watch success videos or videos of motivational speeches. Meditation has been a main force in this streak. The first week of my journey was hard with urges but beyond that it has seemed somewhat peaceful, don't get me wrong I still have thoughts but somehow they disappear.
I am also still suffering from anxiety and depression however the brain fog has lifted. I believe by day 25 I will see even more improvements. I hope the same goes for you.

 

i doubt often but i respect the choice i made 8 month ago, to change my old shitty life and stop wasting my energy. And every time i doubt then i find out that it worth the effort.

 

Yes definitely doubt it if i can reboot to the point where i hope i can go. But as the days adding up and I see more and more progression i get more confident. We will only know if we try, time will tell!

 

Well, abstinence in itself is not a process per se, it is not doing something and hoping the natural healing processes kick in in time - which by itself is really just waiting.

I don't know what the official Nofap process and the tools consist of if you sign up for it since I haven't, but we are all capable of learning and continually refining our process through better understanding, that's why I started the reading challenge thread.

I mean even in terms of the tracker, PMO is really three things. Sure we want to abstain from all or at least PM if one is in a relationship, but that just means in terms of data collecting it would be ideal to have three trackers - though hopefully you don't end up needing it. But it's like Gary Wilson pointed out in Your Brain on Porn:

"Many ask the obvious question: ‘How much is too much?’ This question presumes that porn’s effects are binary.[202] That is, you either have no problem, or you are a porn addict (or have other porn-induced problems). However, asking where one crosses the line ignores the principle of neuroplasticity: the brain is always learning, changing and adapting in response to the environment."

The good news is that means everything you do makes a difference. Maybe you can't go more than say a week or a month in a streak now, but if you learn about yourself and work on it maybe by the end of that period you can go twice as long, and so on - which can end up extending that streak when you couldn't have in the beginning. What you're capable of to start with is different from what you can do later, but that's not going to be the case if it's a wait-and-see game.

 

When you expect the worst, you get the worst. When you expect the best, you find a way to get the best (or see the best). You have to believe, or this shit does nothing.

 

I think everyone goes through that '...this probably isn't going to work for me...' phase.

It's your screwed up brain trying to trick you into a relapse so it can get a dopamine rush.

Tell your brain to shut up, stay strong, and achieve you goals...

Best of luck to you!

 

I'm saying there are probably ways to speed up the process. Like people do all these self improvement activities, and like 12 Step there's a whole psychological process of working the steps. Most people are doing *something*.

 

I have only been able to abstain from sex once in my life. The desire mostly went away after a month or two, but I was in my mid 40's. I was very careful to avoid anything sexually suggestive too. Eventually, I started feeling sorry for myself and became careless. I haven't been able to abstain for any length of time since then (about 5 years ago).

For me, there is no happy medium. I must be so strict that I can't even allow myself to notice pretty women on the sidewalk. Otherwise I just slide down the slippery slope to PMO. ... Everybody is different though. I'm pretty weird. LOL

 

Well isn't some of what you read possibly a part of the healing process, especially if you read about related stuff? I've been doing 10 pages a day, over a year that's 3,650 pages - that's a lot on porn addiction (I'm not even sure if there are that many books on the subject) but if it's just about addiction in general that ends up being a lot of knowledge too. Also a lot of self improvement is about healing.

 

Before i started Nofap i usually masturbated to porn and binged every day, for several decades. I dont feel recovered yet, but i can list a couple of things that has definitely improved so far:
1. General anxiety is gone, at last. It was really painful to have.
2. Much less irritability and short temper.
3. I dont feel creepy around women.

I realized that my recovery will probably take a couple of years. for example my ED hasnt recovered yet.

 

I mean, i edged every day. But i did bing as well occassionally, in stressful periods.

I have tried to reboot for over 4 years. Longest streak so far: 270 days.