Hi guys, just wanted to add on a little extra bit of success I've had in the days since I wrote my big 60 days post. Like I said in that post, I'm now a design lead on the group project for my final year at university, and we had our first proper meeting as a group yesterday. At the time of the meeting it was all professional from me, I have serious problems in most situations that involve groups but when it comes to my degree I have the weird ability to pull confidence out of my ass and take charge, that isn't what this post is about. Later that night I kept trying to think about the meeting and how it went (it went well) but my mind kept becoming fixated on one of the character artists, it was around that moment that it hit me, and I realised; "Holy shit, I have a crush!" This may seem like an extremely trivial thing to be happy about but its important to me, I've been PMO'ing since I started puberty pretty much and have never as much as given a girl a second look, I mean sure if you were to sit me down and force me to say whether I found girls attractive then sure I would, but in a real world environment they just blended into the background and I never gave a shit, I was practically asexual outside of PMO. Now all of a sudden I'm thinking about this girl in a wholesome and non-perverted way, whenever she smiled I couldn't help smiling as well, I cant explain it dudes but I guess my sexuality is coming back and at the risk of sounding sappy I feel so happy about it. I'm hesitant to do anything about these feelings because A. I'm still rebooting and B. She's in my group and I dont want to distract from the crucial final year work, but nonetheless this is progress, holy shit.
congratulations.It's so good to see that your efforts weren't fruitless and you're actually healing in so many ways. Good luck.
I'm probably not going to simply because I dont want to ruin the really good thing I have going on with my group, when I'm thinking objectively focusing on the reboot and my final year makes more sense to me. The point of this post wasn't to ask whether I should ask her out or anything, it was to report back on the fact that for the first time in forever I have gotten feelings like this, which for me was more relevant to the success section than the dating section. Not saying I wont change my mind, I'm just not convinced as of yet.
Healing my sexuality was the main focus of the reboot so this is the best thing that could have happened. If I am like this at day 63 I wonder how I will be in another month, its exciting to think about.
This is really cool! A similar thing has happened to me: I'm starting to find real guys attractive. It's great, but like you I'm in no hurry to jump into a relationship. Listen to yourself. It's a positive step and I'm sure she won't be your last crush.
Yeah exactly, I dont want to rush into anything when I'm not fully healed, its easy to say I'm being cowardly but I'm trying to approach this from a position of logic and to me it makes more sense to sort myself out first. Thats not to say I wont ask her out later, I just dont want to rush into it when I haven't known her that long.
There is absolutely nothing cowardly about what you're doing AT. It sounds very mature, logical and healthy to me. Keep up the good work!
Congrats on 64 days PMO free! Not just that, but hearing of the success in your Uni life makes the accomplishment all the more sweeter. The advice animal inside me making me say go talk to your new crush, at least befriend that person or something but that's all up to you. Plus, considering that she's a group member that could cause problems all the way and I'm putting way too much thought into this you do you man. Kudos to your development! Me and everyone else here can't wait to hear of the new developments you have in your journey to become PMO free.
Cheers, the kind words are appreciated. Considering we will be working together up until just after Christmas this gives me a safe way to gauge things, if I still want to ask her out after the project then I will, but for the time being my main focus is ensuring my uni work goes well.
Thats fantastic bro . During the reboot you will feel a lot of new feelings and sensations that were non existant while you were pmoing and these are the real signs that you are healing . About the girl just chill out dude dont rush things focus on your group and get things done crushes and girls will come and go .
Considering shes in the same group you probably have similar interests and what not. Plus when your in that group environment taking charge she will definitely notice your energy and be interested in you. Your not foaming over her which is a good thing, but come on dude! shes a fucking character artist, She makes you smile and feel good about yourself instead of making you feel awkward and uncomfortable. Never mind the class, Your a boss and your gonna ace it and carry the team along with you. Stop kidding yourself, Your obviously into her and your body will just keep on producing those feels around her no matter what your brain tells you. Plus your gonna work twice as hard on your project when she is your muse. Get to know her. Life's way to short to pass her by.
You are probably right, I just dont want to rush into anything, we are working together up until Christmas so I have plenty of time to get to know her better.
i know what your saying and feeling man now if i only knew this when i was a teenager i can only imagine
Congratulations on your 64th day of your way to rebooting your mind and for your crush you're having! You approach it with a really mature way! Keep leading your team to success! Be friend with each one of your team! Get to know her and everyone of the team! If she got crushed with you, the time until Christmas is great for both of you to learn more about your characters and other aspects of your life!! Keep going!!
so beautiful hope to have these feelings again soon ask her out when you feel more secure in your reboot. you can still concentrate on your project too and congrats for your 64 days PM free
This moves me so much! I'm new here and just starting my commitment. THIS is the goal that I have out of this and to see it work for someone gives me hope to stay on track. Thank you for sharing your wonderful story. So happy for you
